Momwe Mungagonjetsere AYI: Kukambitsirana M'mikhalidwe Yovuta (W. Urey)

Kudalirika

Kodi mukufuna kuphunzira momwe mungapewere mikangano ndikuchita bwino pazokambirana zovuta kwambiri, kutsimikizira ophatikizana ovuta kwambiri, kutembenuza otsutsa kukhala mabwenzi, kumaliza mapangano opindulitsa ndi mapangano?

Wolemba bukuli, m'modzi mwa omwe adayambitsa pulojekiti yotchuka ya Harvard Negotiation Project, amapereka njira yosinthira "njira yopambana" yomwe ili ndi magawo asanu. Zisanu "zosuntha", zogwiritsidwa ntchito motsatizana, zidzathandiza kutembenuza ngakhale kukangana pamutu pakusaka kwapawiri kuti apeze yankho.

Njirayi itha kugwiritsidwa ntchito ndi mdani aliyense - bwana wokwiya, wachinyamata wosokonekera, mnzako wonyozeka, kapena kasitomala wonyansa. Itha kugwiritsidwa ntchito ndi akazembe, maloya, amalonda komanso okwatirana omwe akufuna kupulumutsa mabanja awo. Njira yopambana imakupatsani mwayi wokwaniritsa zomwe mukufuna ngakhale pazokambirana zovuta kwambiri.

I. Kukonzekera

Zofunikira zonse. Gonjetsani zolepheretsa mgwirizano

Diplomacy ndi luso lolola munthu wina kuchita zomwe mukufuna.

Daniel Vare, kazembe waku Italy

Tonse timalowa mu zokambirana tsiku lililonse. Timathera nthawi yathu yambiri kuyesa kupanga mgwirizano ndi anthu ena. Monga momwe tingayesere kukambirana mu mzimu wa mgwirizano, nthawi zambiri tidzakhumudwa. Timalakalaka mgwirizano, koma yankho nthawi zambiri «AYI».

Tangoganizirani tsiku lenileni. Pa chakudya cham'mawa, mumakangana ndi mwamuna kapena mkazi wanu za kugula galimoto yatsopano. Mukuona kuti nthawi yakwana yoti musinthe galimotoyo, koma mwamuna kapena mkaziyo akuyankha kuti: “Zimenezi n’zopusa! Mukudziwa bwino lomwe kuti sitingakwanitse pakali pano. " Ndiye mumabwera kuntchito, komwe mumakhala ndi msonkhano ndi manejala. Mumakamba za polojekiti yatsopano yokonzedwa bwino, koma pakangopita mphindi imodzi bwana akusokonezani ndi mawu akuti: "Tidayesa kale izi, koma sizinaphule kanthu. Funso lotsatira!

Pa nthawi yopuma masana, mumayesa kubwezera chowotcha chowotcha chosalongosoka ku sitolo, koma wogulitsa akukana kubwezera ndalamazo, akumalongosola kuti mulibe risiti: “Awa ndi malamulo m’sitolo yathu.”

Mukatha nkhomaliro, mumabweretsa mgwirizano womwe mwagwirizana kale kwa kasitomala kuti asayine. Mukukula kale. Khalani ndi anzanu za izo ndipo anagwirizana pa kupanga. Koma wolandira chithandizoyo mosayembekezera ananena kuti: “Pepani. Abwana akukana kuvomereza mgwirizanowu pokhapokha mutatichotsera magawo khumi ndi asanu pa zana."

Madzulo muyenera kuyankha mafoni angapo, koma foni imakhala yotanganidwa ndi mwana wanu wamkazi wazaka khumi ndi zitatu. Mumakwiya n’kupempha kuti mutulutse foniyo, ndipo mwana wanuyo akukufuulani ali m’khola kuti: “N’chifukwa chiyani ndilibe mzere wosiyana? Anzanga onse!

Aliyense wa ife amalowa m’kukambitsirana kovuta ndi mwamuna kapena mkazi wake woipidwa, ndi bwana wopondereza, wogulitsa wosanyengerera, kasitomala wosadalirika, kapena wachinyamata wosalamulirika. Pansi pa kupsinjika, ngakhale anthu abwino komanso oganiza bwino amatha kukhala otsutsa okwiya komanso amakani. Kukambitsirana kungapitirire kapena kusokonekera, kutenga nthaŵi, kukusoŵetsani tulo, ndi kuyambitsa zilonda zam’mimba.

M'lingaliro lalikulu, kukambirana ndi njira ya njira ziwiri zoyankhulirana zomwe cholinga chake ndi kukwaniritsa mgwirizano ndi anthu ena pamene zokonda zanu zimagwirizana mwanjira ina ndikusiyana mwa zina. Lingaliro la "zokambirana" silimangokhalira zochitika zovomerezeka, pamene maphwando amakhala patebulo ndikukambirana za ndondomeko; ndikulankhulanso kosakhazikika komwe mumalowera, kuyesa kupeza zomwe mukufuna kuchokera kwa munthu wina.

Kumbukirani momwe mumapangira zisankho zofunika zomwe zimakhudza tsogolo lanu - zisankho zomwe zimakhudza ntchito yanu ndi moyo wanu. Ndi gawo lanji la mavutowa lomwe mungalithetse nokha, ndipo ndi gawo liti lomwe muli nalo kuthetsa pamodzi ndi anthu ena, pokambirana? Pafupifupi aliyense amene ndinamufunsa funsoli anavomereza kuti m'pofunika kukambirana pafupifupi onse. Kukambirana ndiye njira yayikulu yopangira zisankho muzochita zamaluso komanso m'moyo wamunthu.

Tiyeneranso kudziwa kuti iyi ndi njira yayikulu yopangira zisankho pakati pa anthu. Ngakhale muzochitika zimenezo pamene ife eni sitikhala pagome lokambirana, moyo wathu umadalira zotsatira zawo. Zokambilana za kayendetsedwe ka sukulu ndi bungwe la aphunzitsi zikayimilira komanso aphunzitsi atanyanyala, ana athu sapita kusukulu, amakhala kunyumba. Kukambitsirana kwa eni ake akampani imene timagwira ntchito ndi munthu amene angagule zinthu kutha, kampaniyo yatsala pang’ono kugwa ndipo tingathe kutaya ntchito. Ngati kukambirana pakati pa boma la dziko lathu ndi mdani wake sikunapite kulikonse, zotsatira zake zingakhale nkhondo. Mwa kuyankhula kwina, miyoyo yathu imatsimikiziridwa ndi zokambirana.

Kuthetsa vuto limodzi

Tonse ndife okambirana, ngakhale anthu ambiri sakonda ndondomekoyi. Timawona zokambirana ngati kukumana kovutitsa. Zikuwoneka kwa ife kuti tiyenera kupanga chisankho chosasangalatsa. Ngati tiwonetsa "kufewa", kuyesera kukhalabe ndi ubale wabwino ndi mbali inayo, ndiye kuti tidzataya. Ngati titenga "zovuta" kuti tikwaniritse zotsatira zomwe tikufuna, izi zidzasokoneza kapena kusokoneza ubale ndi mbali ina.

Komabe, njira iyi ili ndi njira ina: kuthetsa mavuto ogwirizana. Uku ndi kuphatikiza kwa njira zolimba komanso zofewa: kufewa pokhudzana ndi anthu komanso kukhazikika pazabwino za nkhaniyi. M’malo molimbana wina ndi mnzake, mumagwirizana kuti muukire vutolo. Simumaboolana ndi kuyang'ana mwaukali patebulo, koma khalani pansi pafupi ndi wina ndi mzake ndikuthana ndi vuto linalake. Mwa kuyankhula kwina, mumachotsa kukangana kwanu ndi kuthetsa mavuto pamodzi. Uwu ndi mtundu wa zokambirana zomwe Roger Fischer ndi ine tafotokoza zaka khumi zapitazo mu Negotiating Without Defeat.

Pothetsa mavuto pamodzi, zokonda zimatengedwa ngati maziko, osati malo. Mumayamba ndi kuzindikira zokonda za chipani chotsutsacho—kukayika, zosoŵa, mantha, ndi zikhumbo zimene zimachititsa kaimidwe kawo ndi kuwasonkhezera khalidwe lawo. Kenako muyenera kusanthula njira zosiyanasiyana zokhutiritsa zokonda izi. Cholinga chanu ndi kukwaniritsa mgwirizano wopindulitsa onse awiri m'njira yabwino kwambiri komanso yaubwenzi.

Ngati, mwachitsanzo, mukufuna kukwezedwa ndi kukweza malipiro, ndipo bwana wanu akunena kuti ayi, ponena za kusowa kwa ndalama mu bajeti, musayime panthawiyi. Onani mkhalidwewo ngati vuto lothetsa mavuto. Woyang'anira wanu akuyang'ana zomwe mumakonda, zomwe zingaphatikizepo kulipirira maphunziro a ana anu ndi kukwezedwa pantchito. Kenako mumakambilana pamodzi kuyesa kukwaniritsa zofunazo popanda kupitirira bajeti. Mutha kukambirana kuti muwonjezere ntchito ndi ngongole ya ophunzira yoperekedwa ndi kampani, komanso kulonjeza kuti mupeza ndalama pakatha chaka kuti muthe kubweza ngongoleyo. Pa nthawi yomweyi, zonse zomwe mumakonda komanso zomwe abwana anu amawafunira zidzakwaniritsidwa.

Kuthetsa mavuto pamodzi kumapereka zotsatira zabwino kwa onse awiri. Njirayi imapulumutsa nthawi ndi khama, popeza palibe chifukwa choyima poima. Kuthetsa mavuto pamodzi kaŵirikaŵiri kumakulitsa ubale wapakati pa maguluwo ndipo kumabweretsa kupindulitsana mtsogolo.

Ngati mudakonda kachidutswachi, mutha kugula ndikutsitsa bukulo pa malita

Zopinga zisanu za mgwirizano

Okayikira adzanena kuti zonsezi ndizosavuta kulengeza koma zovuta kuzikwaniritsa. Mfundo za mgwirizano wothetsera mavuto, iwo amati, n’zofanana ndi lumbiro la kukhulupirika la okwatirana kumene: zowinda zaukwati mosakayika zimawongolera maunansi, koma n’zovuta kuzitsatira m’dziko lenileni, lodzala ndi kupsinjika maganizo ndi mikangano, ziyeso ndi mikuntho.

Mwina mungayesetse kuphatikizira otsutsawo kuti athetse vutolo, koma zotsatira zake zitha kukhala kulimbana. Anthu amagonja mosavuta ku kutengeka mtima, chizolowezi choumirira, kapena kugonja ku chikakamizo cha mbali inayo.

Dziko lenileni limadzutsa zolepheretsa mgwirizano. M'munsimu muli zopinga zisanu zofala kwambiri.

Zomwe mumachita. Chotchinga choyamba chiri mwa inu nokha. Khalidwe la munthu limatengera zochita. Mukakhala ndi nkhawa, kukanidwa, kapena kuopsezedwa, chilakolako chanu chachibadwa ndicho kubwezera. Nthawi zambiri, izi zimangotengera zomwe zimachitika, mbali zonse ziwiri zimalephera. Chinanso chomwe chingachitike ndikusiya kukambirana kuti muteteze ubalewo. Pankhaniyi, mumataya powonetsa kufooka ndikulola anthu ena kuti akugwiritseni ntchito. Choncho, vuto siliri mu khalidwe la mbali inayo, komanso momwe mumachitira, zomwe zingayambitse khalidweli.
Malingaliro awo. Cholepheretsa chotsatira ndicho malingaliro oipa a mbali ina. Ukali ukhoza kuyambitsa mkwiyo ndi chidani. Kuumirira kaŵirikaŵiri kumazikidwa pa mantha ndi kusakhulupirira. Otsutsa, otsimikiza za kulondola kwawo ndi kulakwa kwa malo anu, nthawi zambiri amangokana kukumverani. Poganizira kuti dziko lamangidwa pa mfundo ya «munthu ndi nkhandwe kwa munthu», iwo kulungamitsa zidule zawo zauve.
Udindo wawo. Pothetsa vutoli palimodzi, khalidwe la mbali ina, chifukwa cha chizolowezi cholimbitsa maudindo awo ndi kufunafuna kudzipereka kwa wina, kungakhale chopinga. Nthawi zambiri, otsutsa sadziwa njira ina yolankhulirana, koma amangogwiritsa ntchito njira zodziwika bwino zomwe adazidziwa bwino mu sandbox. Zikuwoneka kwa iwo kuti njira yokhayo ndiyo kugonjera, ndipo, mwachibadwa, sangachite izi.
Kusakhutira kwawo. Ngakhale mutakhala ndi cholinga chopanga mgwirizano wopindulirana, mbali inayo sikhala ndi chidwi ndi chotsatiracho. Mwina otsutsa samadzionera okha ubwino. Ngakhale mutakhala okhoza kukhutiritsa zokonda zawo, iwo angatayike mwa kuvomereza zololera. Ndipo ngati mgwirizanowo umachokera pa lingaliro lanu, ukhoza kukanidwa pazifukwa izi.
Mphamvu zawo. Ndipo potsiriza, ngati mbali yotsutsa amaganizira zokambirana mawu a «chigonjetso - kugonja», ndiye izo ndithudi anapereka kupambana. Ndipo zikhoza kutsogoleredwa ndi mfundo yakuti: "Zanga ndi zanga, ndi zanu - tidzawona." Bwanji mugwirizanitse ngati zomwe mukufuna zitha kukwaniritsidwa mothandizidwa ndi mphamvu?

Kuti musamve "ayi", muyenera kuthana ndi zopinga zisanu zonse za mgwirizano: momwe mumamvera, malingaliro awo, malingaliro awo, kusakhutira kwawo, ndi mphamvu zawo. N’zosavuta kukhulupirira kuti kumanga zotchinga, ndewu, ndiponso chinyengo ndi makhalidwe a mbali yotsutsanayo ndipo palibe chimene mungachite. Komabe, ndi mwa mphamvu yanu kukhudza khalidwe lawo ngati mungathe kukhala ndi njira yoyenera pazifukwa zomwe zimatsimikizira khalidweli.

Njira yopulumukira

Bukhuli limapereka njira zisanu zomwe zimapangidwira kuthana ndi zopinga zonse zisanu za mgwirizano-Breakthrough Negotiation Strategy.

Tanthauzo la njirayi lidzakuthandizani kumvetsetsa fanizoli ndi kuyenda. Woyendetsa panyanja pafupifupi sakwanitsa kukwaniritsa cholingacho ngati achita njira yake. Zopinga zochulukirapo zidzabuka pakati pa iye ndi komwe akupita: mphepo yamphamvu ndi mafunde, matanthwe ndi osaya, osatchulanso mikuntho ndi zipolowe. Kuti mufike komwe mukupita, inu, monga woyendetsa panyanja wodziwa zambiri, muyenera kusintha njira yanu nthawi zonse - njira yanu ndi ya zigzag.

Mfundo zomwezi zimagwiranso ntchito pokambirana. Cholinga chanu ndi mgwirizano wopindulitsa nonse. Njira yachindunji (kuyang'ana zokonda poyamba ndiyeno perekani zosankha kuti mukwaniritse zokondazo) imawoneka yosavuta komanso yokopa. Koma m'dziko lenileni la kuyankhidwa koopsa ndi kutengeka maganizo, maudindo okhwima, kusakhutira ndi nkhanza, nthawi zambiri zimakhala zosatheka kukwaniritsa mgwirizano wopindulitsa molunjika. Kuti musakumane ndi zolephera, muyenera kuwongolera - ndiko kuti, kupita ku cholingacho mozungulira.

Cholinga cha njira yopambana ndikungochita zachindunji. Njira imafuna kuti muzichita motsutsana ndi chibadwa chanu pazovuta. Mbali inayo ikakulepheretsani kapena kukuukirani, mumakopeka kuchita chimodzimodzi. Mukakumana ndi chidani, mumayamba mkangano, ndipo mkhalidwe wopanda nzeru umakukakamizani kukana. Kusamvera kwa mdani wanu kumakupangitsani kufuna kumukakamiza, ndipo chiwawa cha mdani chimakukakamizani kubwezera. Komabe, kuchita koteroko kumangokhumudwitsa - mukusewera masewera a munthu wina potsatira malamulo a wina.

mwayi wanu monga negotiator ndi kusintha malamulo a masewera. M'malo mongosewera ndi malamulo a wina, lolani mbali inayo imvetsetse ndikuvomereza njira yanu, yomwe ndi kuthetsa mavuto pamodzi. Mmodzi wa osewera mpira wamkulu, Sadahara Oh (mukhoza kumutcha Japanese Babe Ruth) kamodzi anaulula chinsinsi cha kupambana kwake. Ananenanso kuti amawona seva yotsutsa ngati mnzake, aliyense amamupatsa mwayi wogoletsa. Okambirana opambana amachitanso chimodzimodzi: amachitira winayo ngati bwenzi kuti akwaniritse mgwirizano wopindulitsa. Mu masewera a karati a ku Japan - monga judo, jujitsu ndi aikido - imodzi mwa mfundo zazikuluzikulu ndikupewa kutsutsa mwachindunji mphamvu yanu kwa wotsutsa. Popeza kuyesa kuswa kukana kumangolimbitsa, mukuyesera kudutsa kukana kwa mdani. Umu ndi momwe kupambanitsa kumapangidwira.

Njira yodumphadumpha simaphatikizapo kukakamiza wina kuti akhale mbali inayo. M'malo mobweretsa lingaliro latsopano kuchokera kunja, mumathandizira chipani chotsutsana nacho kuti chidzipange okha. Simuwauza zoyenera kuchita, koma aloleni asankhe okha. Simuwakakamiza kuti asinthe malingaliro awo, koma mumapanga mikhalidwe yophunzirira. Ndi iwo okha omwe angagonjetse kukana kwawo, ntchito yanu ndikuwathandiza.

Kukana kuthetsa mavuto ogwirizana kumatsimikiziridwa ndi zotchinga zisanu zomwe zatchulidwa pamwambapa. Monga wokambirana nawo, muyenera kuchotsa zotchinga pakati pa AYI ndi YES ku mgwirizano wopindulitsa. Chotchinga chilichonse chili ndi njira yakeyake.

Khwerero XNUMX. Popeza chotchinga choyamba ndicho kuyankha kwanu kwachilengedwe, chinthu choyamba ndikuletsa kuyankha komweko. Kuti muthetse mavuto pamodzi, muyenera kukhalabe ndi mtendere wamumtima ndikuyang'ana kwambiri kukwaniritsa cholingacho. Njira yothandiza yowonera zochitika zonse ndikulingalira kuti mwaima pa khonde ndikuyang'ana pansi pazokambirana. Gawo loyamba la njira yopambana ndikukwera pakhonde.
Gawo Lachiwiri. Chotchinga chotsatira chomwe muyenera kuthana nacho ndi malingaliro oyipa a mbali inayo, yomwe imaphatikizapo chitetezo, mantha, kukayikira, ndi chidani. N’zosavuta kukangana, koma musagonje pa mayeserowo. Mukathana ndi malingaliro anu, muyenera kuthandiza winayo kuti achite zomwezo. Kuti pakhale nyengo yabwino yothetsera vuto limodzi, ndikofunikira kuchotsa malingaliro oyipa a okondedwa. Kuti muchite izi, muyenera kuchita zosiyana ndi zomwe amayembekezera. Amayembekezera kuti muzichita zinthu ngati mdani. M’malo mwake, muyenera kupita njira ina mwa kumvetsera otsutsa, kuvomereza zokangana ndi malingaliro awo, kuvomerezana nawo, ndi kusonyeza ulemu. Ngati mukufuna kukhala pansi ndikuyamba kuthetsa mavuto, muyenera kupita kumbali yawo.
Khwerero XNUMX. Tsopano ndi nthawi yoti tiyambe kugwira ntchito limodzi kuti tithetse vutoli. Izi ndizovuta kuchita ngati mbali inayo sibwereranso sitepe imodzi pa malo ake ndikuyesera kukwaniritsa kudzipereka kwanu. Muli ndi chikhumbo chachibadwa chokana kupereka kwawo, koma izi zidzangowonjezera kuuma kwawo. Chitani zosiyana. Mvetserani chiganizocho ndikuchikonzanso poyesa kuthetsa vutolo. Kotero, mwachitsanzo, mukhoza kudziwana ndi malo a mbali ina ndikuyesera kupeza zolinga: "Chonde fotokozani mwatsatanetsatane. Ndikufuna kumvetsetsa chifukwa chake mukuzifuna. ” Chitani ngati adani anu akufunadi kuthetsa vutoli. Choncho, Gawo lachitatu la njira yopulumukira ndikusintha chimango.
Gawo Lachinayi. Ngakhale mutakwanitsa kuphatikizira mbali inayo pothetsa mavuto pamodzi, mgwirizano wothandizana nawo ungakhale kutali kwambiri. Okambirana nawo angakhale osakhutira ndikukayikira ubwino wa mgwirizano. Mwinamwake mukufuna kuwakakamiza, koma izi zidzangowonjezera kukana. Chitani zosiyana. Monga momwe wanzeru wina waku China adanenera, munthu ayenera "kumanga mlatho wagolide" kulumikiza malo awo ndi mgwirizano wopindulitsa. Muyenera kutseka kusiyana pakati pa zomwe amakonda ndi zanu. Athandizeni kupulumutsa nkhope ndikuvomereza zotsatira za zokambiranazo ngati chigonjetso chawo. Gawo lachinayi njira yopambana ndikumangira mlatho wagolide.
Khwerero XNUMX. Mosasamala kanthu za kuyesayesa kwanu kopambana, mbali inayo ingakhalebe yosagwirizanika, yokhutiritsidwa kuti ingakugonjetseni mwaukali. Panthawi imeneyi, pali chiyeso chokulitsa mkangano. Komabe, ziwopsezo ndi kukakamiza nthawi zambiri zimakumana ndi kukana, zomwe zimapangitsa kuti pakhale nkhondo zodula komanso zopanda phindu. Njira ina ndiyo kugwiritsa ntchito mphamvu osati kukulitsa mkangano, koma kuphunzitsa. Limbitsani mphamvu zanu ngati wokambirana kuti mubweretse mbali inayo ku tebulo lokambirana. Onetsani adani anu kuti sangapambane paokha - ndi inu nokha. Choncho, Gawo lachisanu la njira yopambana ndikugwiritsa ntchito mphamvu kuti muphunzire.

Mayendedwe a masitepewa ndi ofunika kwambiri. Simungathe kuzimitsa malingaliro oyipa a mbali ina popanda kulimbana ndi zanu. Ndizovuta kumanga mlatho wagolide kwa mnzanu mpaka mutasintha masewerawa kukhala njira yogawana nawo vuto. Koma izi sizikutanthauza kuti, mutatenga, mwachitsanzo, sitepe yoyamba, muyenera kuganizira gawo ili latha. M'malo mwake, panthawi yonse yokambirana, muyenera "kukwera khonde". Mukangowona mkwiyo kapena kukhumudwa kwa omwe akukutsutsani, muyenera kuchitapo kanthu kwa iwo. Njira yolankhulirana ingayerekezedwe ndi symphony, momwe zida zosiyanasiyana zimalowera chimodzi pambuyo pa chimzake, ndiyeno zimatsogolera mbali zawo mpaka kumapeto.

Njira yopambana ingagwiritsidwe ntchito kwa aliyense, monga bwana wokwiya, wachinyamata wokhumudwa, wogwira naye ntchito wankhanza, kapena kasitomala wosayembekezereka. Itha kugwiritsidwa ntchito ndi akazembe omwe akufuna kupewa nkhondo, ndi maloya omwe safunikira mlandu wodula, kapena okwatirana omwe akufuna kupulumutsa banja.

Palibe anthu awiri ndi mikhalidwe yofanana, kotero kuti mupange njira yanu, muyenera kuphatikiza mfundo zazikuluzikulu za njira yopambana ndi chidziwitso chazomwe zikuchitika. Palibe Chinsinsi chamatsenga chomwe chimatsimikizira kupambana pazokambirana zilizonse. Koma kuleza mtima, kupirira, ndi njira yopambana zidzakulitsa mwayi wanu wopeza zomwe mukufuna ngakhale pazokambirana zovuta kwambiri.

Mitu yotsatirayi ikufotokoza masitepe asanu a njira yopulumutsira ndikupereka njira zenizeni zowagwiritsira ntchito, zowonetsedwa ndi zitsanzo zenizeni. Choyamba, komabe, pali mawu oyamba okhudza zomwe ndizofunikira pakukambitsirana kothandiza: kukonzekera.

Mawu Oyamba. Kukonzekera, kukonzekera ndi kukonzekera zambiri

Nthaŵi ina ndinafunsa kazembe wa dziko la Britain, Lord Carendon, phunziro lalikulu limene anaphunzira m’zaka zambiri za ntchito yabwino m’boma. “Phunziro lalikulu,” iye anayankha motero, “ndinaliphunzira kuchiyambi kwenikweni kwa ntchito yanga, pamene ndinaikidwa ku Middle East monga phungu wa mmodzi wa oimira akuluakulu a m’deralo. Abwana anga amayenera kubwera kumudzi wina tsiku lililonse kuti athetse mikangano ndi kuthetsa mavuto ena ovuta. Kufika kwake kunayambitsa mliri weniweni - anthu ammudzi adamuzungulira ndi zopempha ndikumenyana wina ndi mzake kuti apereke khofi. Ndipo kotero izo zinapitirira mpaka madzulo, mpaka ife tinachoka. M'malo otere, amatha kuyiwala mosavuta cholinga chaulendo wake, ngati sichoncho chizolowezi chimodzi ...

Asanalowe m’mudzi, ankaimitsa jipi m’mphepete mwa msewu n’kufunsa kuti, “Kodi m’mudzi muno tichita chiyani lerolino?” Tinayankha limodzi funsoli kenako n’kupitirira. Atatuluka m’mudziwo kumapeto kwa tsikulo, anaimitsanso jeep m’mphepete mwa msewu n’kufunsa kuti: “Kodi tinagwira ntchito bwanji? Kodi mwakwanitsa kuchita zomwe mukufuna?"

Chizolowezi chosavutachi ndi phunziro lalikulu lomwe Carendon anaphunzira. Msonkhano uliwonse uyambe kukonzekera. Pambuyo pa msonkhano uliwonse, m'pofunika kuwunika momwe zikuyendera, kusintha ndondomekoyi ndikukonzekera kuzungulira kwatsopano. Chinsinsi cha zokambirana zogwira mtima ndi zophweka: kukonzekera, kukonzekera, kukonzekera.

Zokambirana zambiri zimapambana kapena kutayika zisanayambe, kutengera mtundu wa kukonzekera. Aliyense amene akuyembekezera bwino «improvisation» nthawi zambiri amalakwitsa kwambiri. Ngakhale ngati anthu oterowo akwanitsa kumvana, kaŵirikaŵiri amaphonya mipata yopindula imene ingadzabwere kuchokera m’kukonzekerako. Kukambitsiranako kumakhala kovuta kwambiri, kukonzekera kumayenera kukhala kozama.

Pankhani yokonzekera, anthu ambiri amadzuka m’mwamba mokhumudwa kuti: “Koma sindingathe kuwononga nthawi pokonzekera!” Zikuwoneka kuti kukonzekera kuli pansi pamndandanda wawo woti achite. Mwina foni idzayimba, kufuna kuyankha mwachangu, kapena muyenera kuthamangira kumsonkhano womwe simungathe kuphonya, kapena vuto lachangu libuka m'nyumba ...

Ndipotu, simungakwanitse kukonzekera. Tengani nthawi yokonzekera, ngakhale zitatanthauza kufupikitsa zokambiranazo. Kuchita bwino kwa zokambirana kudzawonjezeka kwambiri ngati otenga nawo mbali amathera nthawi yochuluka yokonzekera, ndipo zochepa pazokambiranazo.

Sitikukayikira kuti nthawi zambiri timagwira ntchito nthawi yochepa. Malangizo otsatirawa okonzekera zokambirana amaganizira izi. Malingaliro awa (tebulo lokonzekera mwachangu laperekedwa mu Zakumapeto kumapeto kwa bukhuli) litha kutha mu mphindi khumi ndi zisanu zokha. Lamulo la chala chachikulu ndi: mphindi imodzi yokonzekera mphindi iliyonse yolumikizana ndi mbali inayo.

Koma kodi munthu angakonzekere bwanji zokambirana? Pazokambirana, monga paulendo, chinthu chofunikira kwambiri ndi mapu abwino.

Kupanga njira yopita ku mgwirizano

Njira yopita ku mgwirizano wopindulirana ili ndi mfundo zisanu zofunika. Izi ndi zokonda, zosankha zokhutiritsa zokonda izi, miyezo yothanirana ndi zotsutsana, njira zina zokambilana ndi malingaliro.

1. Zosangalatsa

Kukambitsirana, monga lamulo, kumayamba pamene udindo wa gulu limodzi umatsutsana ndi udindo wa mbali inayo. Mu malonda wamba, ndikwanira kuti mudziwe malo anu pasadakhale. Komabe, njira yolumikizirana yavutoyi ikuwonetsa kuyitanitsa zokonda zomwe zimayika mbali zonse ziwiri. Kusiyana kwa mfundozi n’kofunika kwambiri. Udindo ndi chinthu chofunikira chomwe chimafotokozedwa mu madola, masenti, mawu ndi zikhalidwe. Zokonda ndizo zolinga zosaoneka zomwe zimakulimbikitsani kuti mutenge malo omwe mwapatsidwa, ndiko kuti, zosowa, zokhumba, nkhawa, mantha, ndi zokhumba. Kuti mupange mgwirizano womwe ungakhutiritse onse awiri, choyamba muyenera kudziwa zokonda za gulu lililonse.

Nenani zokonda zanu. Ngati simukudziwa komwe mukupita, simudzafika kumeneko. Mwachitsanzo, tiyerekeze kuti muli ndi kasitomala wokana yemwe amaumirira pamtengo woyambira wa ntchito zanu. Panthawi imodzimodziyo, amanyalanyaza mtengo wa ntchito yowonjezera, kufunikira kwake komwe sikukanadziwikiratu. Pazokambirana zotere, malingaliro anu atha kufotokozedwa motere: "Ndikufuna kuonjezera mtengo ndi makumi atatu peresenti kuti ndiziwerengera ndalama zowonjezera." Chidwi chanu pakukweza mtengo chingakhale kusunga phindu ndikusunga kasitomala wosangalala. Kupeza zokonda zanu kumathandiza funso limodzi losavuta: chifukwa chiyani? Chifukwa chiyani ndikufuna izi? Kodi ndikuyesera kuthetsa vuto lanji?

Ndikofunikira kwambiri kugawa zokonda zanu molingana ndi kufunikira kwake. Kupanda kutero, mutha kupanga cholakwika chofala kwambiri popereka chiwongola dzanja chofunikira pa zomwe sizofunikira. Ngati ubale ndi kasitomala umalonjeza kukhala wopindulitsa kwambiri, ndiye kuti chidwi ichi chikhoza kuperekedwa patsogolo kwambiri. Chidwi chopanga phindu mu polojekitiyi chikhoza kuzimiririka kumbuyo, ndipo chachitatu pamndandanda chidzakhala chikhumbo chofuna kusapanga chitsanzo cha ntchito yowonjezera yaulere.

Dziwani zokonda za mbali inayo. Kukambirana ndi njira ziwiri. Nthawi zambiri simungathe kukwaniritsa zofuna zanu popanda kukhutiritsa zofuna za gulu lina. Choncho, n'kofunika kwambiri kumvetsa zofuna zawo - osati zochepa kuposa zanu. Mwina kasitomala wonyinyirika akuda nkhawa ndi kukhala mkati mwa bajeti ndi kufunafuna kutamandidwa ndi bwana.

Ndimakumbukira amalume anga a Mel akubwera muofesi yanga ku Harvard Law School paulendo wawo wazaka makumi awiri ndi zisanu. Anandikokera pambali nati, “Ukudziwa, Bill, zinanditengera zaka makumi awiri ndi zisanu kuti ndiiwale zomwe ndinaphunzira ku Harvard Law School. Chifukwa apa ndinaphunzitsidwa kuti chinthu chokhacho chofunika m’moyo ndicho mfundo. Ndani ali wolondola ndi wolakwa ndani. Zinanditengera zaka makumi awiri ndi zisanu kuti ndizindikire kuti chofunikira kwambiri, ngati sichinali chofunikira kwambiri kuposa zenizeni zenizeni, ndi momwe anthu amawonera zenizeni. Ngati simukumvetsetsa izi, simungathe kutseka mapangano kapena kuthetsa mikangano. ”

Chinthu chofunika kwambiri pa luso la zokambirana ndikutha kudziyika nokha pamalo a mbali ina. Ngati mukuyesera kusintha malingaliro awo, ndiye kuti muyenera kumvetsetsa malingaliro amenewo poyamba.

Koma kodi mungadziŵe bwanji zokonda za mbali inayo? Yesani kungoyang'ana vutolo momwe amawonera ndikumvetsetsa zomwe amasamala kwambiri. Kenako dzifunseni nokha: kodi ndizovuta kuchita nawo bizinesi konse, kapena kodi uku ndikupatuka kwakanthawi kuchokera kuchizolowezi? Ndi zochitika ziti m'moyo wawo waukatswiri kapena waumwini zomwe zidakhudza momwe amakuonerani? Kodi ali ndi mbiri yokhala olankhulana moona mtima komanso mwachilungamo? Ngati nthaŵi ilola, mungalankhule ndi anthu amene ali nawo pafupi—ndi mabwenzi, anzanu akusukulu, makasitomala ndi antchito amene ali pansi pawo. Mukamaphunzira zambiri za mbali yotsutsayo, m'pamenenso mumakhala ndi mwayi waukulu woti muwasonkhezere.

2. Zosankha

Cholinga chozindikiritsa zokonda za onse awiri ndikuwona ngati zosankha zosavomerezeka zitha kupezeka kuti zikwaniritse zokonda izi. Kupangidwa kwa zosankha zopindulitsa ndi mwayi waukulu wa wokambirana. Okambirana bwino samangodula chitumbuwa cha kukula kodziwika. Poyamba amafunafuna njira zokulitsira chitumbuwachi.

Sikuti nthaŵi zonse n’zotheka kukhalabe ndi udindo, koma kaŵirikaŵiri kumakhala kotheka kukwaniritsa zofuna za munthu. Simungathe kukweza mtengowo ndi makumi atatu peresenti, koma mukhoza kupeza njira yomwe ingakuthandizeni kuti mupindule ndi polojekitiyi ndipo nthawi yomweyo mukhutiritse kasitomala. Kodi ndizotheka kusamutsa zina mwazowonjezera kwa antchito a kasitomala? Ndipo ngati mukulitsa pulojekitiyi mpaka chaka chamawa chandalama, kuti ndalama zowonjezera ziphatikizidwe mu bajeti ya chaka chamawa? Ndipo kodi n'zotheka kubwezera kuchepa kwa phindu la polojekitiyi pochita mgwirizano pa ntchito yaikulu yamtsogolo? Koma bwanji ngati mungasonyeze kwa kasitomala kuti ntchito yowonjezera idzabweretsa ndalama zambiri, zina zomwe zingagwiritsidwe ntchito kulipira ntchitozi?

Kulakwitsa kofala kwambiri pakukambirana ndikulephera kuchoka pa njira yokhayo, ndiko kuti, malo oyambira. Pozindikira kukhalapo kwa zosankha zingapo, mumatsegula njira zatsopano, imodzi yomwe ingatumikire zokonda zanu ndikukhutiritsa mbali inayo.

Cholepheretsa chachikulu pakupanga zosankha zatsopano ndi mawu ang'onoang'ono m'mutu mwathu omwe amangobwerezabwereza kuti, "Izi sizigwira ntchito." Zinthu zofunika kwambiri za kuganiza monga kusanthula mozama ndi kuwunika zimatha kulepheretsa malingaliro. Choncho, ndi bwino kulekanitsa ntchito zimenezi. Pewani kuweruza kwa mphindi zingapo ndikuyesera kubwera ndi malingaliro ambiri momwe mungathere. Osataya zomwe poyang'ana koyamba zimawoneka zachilendo - kumbukirani kuti zambiri mwazinthu zodabwitsa kwambiri za anthu zidayamba ndi malingaliro achilendo, okanidwa ndi aliyense. Poganizira zosankha zambiri momwe mungathere, mumatha kuzisanthula ndikuwunika momwe akukwaniritsira zokonda zanu komanso za mbali inayo.

3. Miyezo

Mukakulitsa chitumbuwacho, ndi nthawi yoganizira momwe mungagawire. Koma kodi palimodzi mungasankhe bwanji njira yoyenera ngati zokonda zanu zikusiyana ndi za mbali ina? Wofuna chithandizo akufuna kulipira pang'ono momwe angathere pantchitoyo, ndipo mukufuna kupeza zambiri. Kodi mungathetse bwanji kusagwirizanaku? Mwinamwake njira yodziwika kwambiri ndiyo kukangana. Mbali iliyonse imaumirira pa malo ake, kuyesera kukakamiza mdani kugonja. Vuto lonse lagona pa mfundo yakuti palibe amene amafuna capitulate. Mkangano pa zoyenereza mwachangu kwambiri umasanduka mkangano wa zikhumbo. Munthu amene amakakamizika kugonjera amakumbukira kugonjetsedwa kwake ndipo amayesa kubwezera nthawi ina - ngati pali nthawi ina.

Okambirana opambana amapewa kugundana mwa kusintha njira yosankhidwa kukhala kusaka kophatikizana kwa mgwirizano wachilungamo komanso wopindulitsa. Zimakhazikitsidwa pamiyezo yabwino popanda zofuna za mbali zonse ziwiri. Muyezo wodziyimira pawokha ndiye njira yopezera yankho labwino. Miyezo yofanana yotereyi ndiyo mtengo wamsika, kufanana, malamulo, ngakhalenso momwe mkangano wam'mbuyomu umathetsedwera.

Ubwino waukulu wa miyezo ndi wakuti mbali zonse zimagwirizana pa zomwe zimaonedwa kuti ndi zachilungamo, m'malo moumirira kuti gulu limodzi lilole linzake pamfundo inayake. Ndikosavuta kuti kasitomala agwirizane ndi muyezo monga mtengo wamsika kusiyana ndi kulipira chindapusa chifukwa choti mwalipira.

Pazifukwa izi, muyenera kuganizira pasadakhale kuti ndi miyezo iti yomwe ingatchulidwe pakukambirana. Kukonzekera kunyumba kuyenera kuphatikizira kusanthula mitengo yamisika, njira zasayansi, mtengo, miyezo yaukatswiri, ndi zoyambira. Dzikonzekereni ndi mfundo kuti mutsimikizire.

4. Njira zina

Nthawi zambiri, anthu amabwera kudzakambirana ndi cholinga chofuna kupeza zomwe akufuna ndipo amangoyamba kuganizira njira zina akakumana ndi zovuta zazikulu. Ichi ndi cholakwika chakale. Kudziwa zisankho kungapangitse chipambano pokwaniritsa zokonda zanu.

Cholinga cha zokambirana sichiyenera kukhala mgwirizano. Zoona zake n’zakuti mgwirizano wangokhala njira yongokhutiritsa zofuna zake. Cholinga cha zokambirana ndikuzindikira zomwe zingakusangalatseni: mgwirizano kapena Njira Yabwino Kwambiri Pamgwirizano Wokambirana (BAT).

NAOS ndi njira ina mukatuluka pamasewera. Iyi ndiye njira yomveka bwino ngati palibe mgwirizano. Ngati mukukambirana ndi abwana anu kuti akweze malipiro, ndiye kuti njira yabwino kwambiri yomwe mungachitire ingakhale yogwirira ntchito kukampani ina. Ngati mukukangana ndi wogulitsa, kuyankhula ndi woyang'anira dipatimenti kapena kugwiritsa ntchito ntchito za sitolo ina kungakhale ngati BAT. Ngati mayiko awiri akukangana pazamalonda, khoti lapadziko lonse lapansi lingakhale njira yabwino kwambiri. Monga lamulo, kupita ku NAOS kumabweretsa ndalama zowonjezera ndikuwonjezera ubale - chifukwa chake mukukambirana, kuyesera kupeza njira yabwino yothetsera vutoli.

NAOS imatsimikizira mphamvu ya wokambirana aliyense. Mphamvu zanu monga wokambirana sizidziwika ndi kukhala wamkulu, wamkulu, kapena wolemera kuposa mbali ina, koma ndi khalidwe la njira yabwino yothetsera yankho lomwe likukambidwa. NAOS yotheka imakupatsani mwayi wokwaniritsa cholinga chanu. Momwe NAOS ilili bwino, mumakhalanso wamphamvu.

Fotokozerani NAOS yanu. Njira yabwino yothetsera vuto lomwe likukambidwa liyenera kukhala njira yomwe mungafikire mgwirizano womwe ungachitike. Pali mitundu itatu ya njira zina zomwe muyenera kuziganizira popanga NEA.

Choyamba, kodi mungatani kuti mukwaniritse zokonda zanu? Njira ina yanu mukatuluka pamasewerawa ingakhale kuyang'ana wogulitsa wina (kapena kasitomala wina ngati ndinu wogulitsa).

Kachiwiri, mungawapangitse bwanji kuti azilemekeza zofuna zanu? Izi "zochita" njira zina monga, mwachitsanzo, kugunda ndi nkhondo. Ndipo chachitatu, momwe mungayikitsire mbali inayo pamalo pomwe ingalimbikitse zokonda zanu? Njira ina yophatikizira "chipani chachitatu" ingaphatikizepo kupita kwa mkhalapakati, wotsutsana kapena bwalo lamilandu. Mukapanga zosankha zingapo, sankhani pakati pawo yomwe ikugwirizana ndi zomwe mumakonda.

Khalani ndi NAOS nthawi zonse. Mukapanikizika kwambiri komanso mukuchita mantha, mutha kunyamula mthumba mwanu ndikunena kuti, "Zili bwino ngakhale izi zitalakwika."

Konzani NAOS yanu. Monga lamulo, NAOS sikuwoneka mu mawonekedwe okonzeka - iyenera kupangidwa. Ngati njira ina si yabwino kwambiri, njira ziyenera kuchitidwa kuti ziwongolere. Kotero, mwachitsanzo, kufufuza malo ena mu bizinesi yomweyi sikuyenera kutengedwa ngati NAOS. Ndi bwino kuyesetsa ndi kusintha kwenikweni ntchito. Ngati mukugulitsa nyumba, musazengereze kusonyeza munthu mmodzi atasonyeza chidwi chenicheni; yang'anani ogula ena. Ngati kampani yanu ili pachiwopsezo cholandidwa ndi wowononga, yesani kupeza ogula ochezeka kapena lingalirani kutenga ngongole kuti mugulitsenso magawo, kutenga kampaniyo mwachinsinsi.

Sankhani ngati mukufuna kukambirana. Popeza mwakonza njira yabwino koposa m’malo mwa mgwirizano umene mukukambitsirana, muyenera kudzifunsa kuti: “Kodi n’koyenera kuchita zokambirana?” Kodi munayamba mwadzifunsapo kuti n’chifukwa chiyani anthu ena sasiya kukambirana ndi bwana wankhanza pamene anayenera kusiya kalekale? Kapena n’chifukwa chiyani makolo othedwa nzeru amapitirizabe kukhulupirira malonjezo a achinyamata amene ali ndi mavuto, omwe amasweka mwamsanga ngati omalizira? Chizolowezi, manyazi, kulakwa ndi mantha zonse zimathandizira, koma chifukwa chachikulu ndi chakuti wogwira ntchitoyo kapena makolo aiwala za njira yabwino yothetsera yankho lomwe likukambidwa. Ngati akanaganizira za NAOS, akanapeza njira yabwino yochitira zofuna zawo popanda kukambirana ndi mdani wochenjera komanso wankhanza.

N'zotheka kuti NAOS yanu ndi yabwino kuposa mgwirizano uliwonse womwe mungathe kumaliza ndi munthu uyu. Kumbukiraninso kuti zokambirana zokha zimafuna ndalama zina. Zitha kutenga nthawi yambiri komanso khama, ndipo chifukwa chake, muyenera kusiya njira zina zonse. Choncho, chisankho choyambitsa zokambirana chiyenera kuyesedwa mosamala.

Musaiwale kuopsa kopitilira muyeso wa NEA yanu. Oyang'anira makampani ambiri, atamvera malangizo a maloya odzidalira, anakana kukambitsirana ndi kupita kukhoti, ndipo kenako anapezeka kuti ali pafupi ndi kugwa kwachuma. Chifukwa cha mlandu uliwonse, kumenyedwa kapena nkhondo, mmodzi wa magulu omenyana - ndipo nthawi zina onse awiri - amapeza kuti NAOS yake si yabwino monga momwe amaganizira. Ngati mukudziwa pasadakhale kuti njira ina si wokongola kwambiri, ndiye kuyesetsa kukwaniritsa mgwirizano.

Tsimikizirani NAOS ya chipani chotsutsa. Kudziwa njira yabwino ya mbali inayo kungakhale kofunika monga kupanga zanu. NAOS. Izi zimakupatsani lingaliro lazovuta zomwe zili patsogolo panu: kupanga mgwirizano womwe umaposa njira zawo zabwino kwambiri. Izi zikuthandizani kupewa misampha iwiri yongoyerekeza kapena kupeputsa NAT ya chipani chotsutsa. N'zotheka kuti NAOS yanu ndi yofooka, koma NAOS ya chipani chotsutsa ingakhalenso yofooka. Ogulitsa ambiri ndi alangizi ali otsimikiza kuti makasitomala awo amatha kusintha nthawi yomweyo kwa omwe akupikisana nawo. Nthawi zambiri sizimayimira mtengo weniweni wosinthira ogulitsa. Kuwunika kwa cholinga cha njira zina zabwino za makasitomala awo kudzapatsa ogulitsa chidaliro pazokambirana zovuta.

Ngati mbali yotsutsana ya NAOS ikuphatikizapo kugwiritsa ntchito mphamvu, ndiye kuti muli ndi mwayi wokonzekera pasadakhale kulimbanako. Kotero, mwachitsanzo, ngati kampani yanu ikuopsezedwa ndi owononga, mukhoza kusintha ndondomeko ya kampaniyo kuti ikhale yovuta kwambiri kuti ikhale yovuta. Ganizirani za momwe mungachepetsere zotsatira za zochita za adani.

5. Zopereka

Kuganizira zokonda ndi kusanthula zosankha kumatsegula njira yothetsera vutoli. Kukhazikitsidwa kwa miyezo yoyenera ndi kukhazikitsa njira zina kumathandiza kusankha njira yoyenera, yomwe idzakhala maziko a malingaliro a mgwirizano wotheka.

Kuti mupange chopereka choyenera, muyenera kusankha njira yomwe ikugwirizana ndi zokonda zanu kuposa NAOS. Njirayi iyeneranso kutumikira zofuna za chipani chotsutsa bwino kuposa NAOS yawo, ndipo ziyenera kukhazikitsidwa pamiyezo yabwino ngati kuli kotheka. Malingaliro amasiyana ndi momwe amakhalira nthawi zonse: lingalirolo ndi mgwirizano womwe mwakonzeka kuvomereza.

Zachidziwikire, malingaliro angapo amatha kukwaniritsa izi nthawi imodzi. Chifukwa chake, ndikofunikira kukumbukira njira zitatu zopangira mgwirizano.

Kodi mukuyesetsa chiyani? Ambiri aife tili ndi chizolowezi chodziikira zolinga zosavuta kuti tipewe "zolephera". Tsoka ilo, zofunidwa zochepa nthawi zambiri zimangokwaniritsa zokha. Mbali inayo nthawi zambiri sangakupatseni zomwe simukupempha. Choncho, n'zosadabwitsa kuti omwe amayamba ndi zopempha zapamwamba, koma zenizeni, amapeza mgwirizano wabwino. Koma kodi «zenizeni» zikutanthauza chiyani? Malire a zenizeni amatsimikiziridwa ndi chilungamo ndi njira yabwino kwambiri ya mbali inayo. Khalani ndi zolinga zapamwamba.

Yambani ndi kufunsa, “Kodi ndikuyang’ana mgwirizano wanji? Ndi chiyani chomwe chidzakhutiritse zokonda zanga komanso nthawi yomweyo kuchotsa nkhawa zazikulu za mbali ina - kotero kuti pali mwayi wopeza mgwirizano wawo?

Mukulolera kuvomera chiyani? Nthawi zambiri, kupeza chilichonse chomwe mukufuna sikutheka. Choncho, n’kothandiza kudzifunsa funso lachiŵiri lakuti: “Ndi mgwirizano wotani, ngakhale ngati sunali wabwino, umene ungakhutiritse zofuna zanga zazikulu kuti ndigwirizane nawo?”

Mudzapirira ndi chiyani? Lingaliro lachitatu liyenera kuzikidwa pa kuwunika kwa NEA yomwe: "Ndi mgwirizano uti womwe ungakwaniritse zokonda zanga bwino pang'ono kuposa njira yabwino yothetsera yankho lomwe likukambidwa? Kodi ndivomereza mgwirizano wanji, ngakhale movutikira? Ngati simungathe kukwaniritsa ngakhale mgwirizano wotere, ndi bwino kuganizira kusiya tebulo lokambirana ndikutembenukira ku njira ina. Njirayi imagwira ntchito ya «mpanda waya», kukukumbutsani kuopsa kovomereza mgwirizano woipa kuposa NEA.

Ganizirani za mitundu itatu iyi yamalingaliro osati ngati malo okhazikika, koma ngati mafanizo owoneka bwino a zosankha zosiyanasiyana kuti mukwaniritse zokonda zanu. Simungadziwe pasadakhale ngati gulu lotsutsa lidzavomereza malingaliro anu. Kuonjezera apo, pokambirana, nthawi zambiri pamakhala yankho lomwe liri loyenera kwambiri pazokonda zanu - komanso zofuna za mbali inayo.

Kubwereza

Kukonzekera kukambitsirana kungakhale kosavuta mwa kukambitsirana ndi munthu wina. Wakunja adzawayamikira ndi mawonekedwe atsopano; akhoza kubweretsa malingaliro atsopano; kukupatsani chidwi pa mfundo zokayikitsa zomwe mwina simunazizindikire; ndipo, potsiriza, kukupatsani inu chithandizo cha makhalidwe abwino. Choncho, ndi bwino kuganizira zobwereza zokambirana ndi mnzanu kapena mnzanu. Ubwino wowonjezera wa njirayi ndikuti pankhaniyi kukonzekera zokambirana sikungapewedwe.

Pokonzekera, yambani zonse zomwe munganene kwa otsutsawo, komanso mayankho anu ku malingaliro awo. Kupatula apo, maloya amayeserera zokamba pamilandu yovuta, andale amayeserera zoyankhulana ndi atolankhani, oyang'anira mabungwe amayeserera zolankhula kwa omwe ali ndi masheya - bwanji osayezetsa zokambirana zovuta? Ndi bwino kulakwitsa mu rehearsal ndi bwenzi kapena mnzanu kuposa kukambirana kwenikweni.

Funsani mnzanu kuti atenge gawo la mdani ndikuyesa mphamvu zanu zokopa, luso lanu loyang'ana zomwe mumakonda, zosankha, ndi miyezo. Mukamaliza, funsani mnzanu zomwe zinagwira ntchito ndi zomwe sizinagwire ntchito. Zimakhala bwanji kukhala mdani wanu? Kodi muyenera kusintha chiyani muzochita zanu? Kenako yesaninso mpaka mutapeza bwino. Ngati simungapeze mnzanu kapena mnzanu woti azichita nawo mdani, yesani kulemba zonse zomwe munganene ndikubwereza nokha.

Yesetsani kuyembekezera machenjerero a mbali inayo ndikuganiziratu momwe mungayankhire. Pochita izi, mudzachepetsa mwayi woti mutengeke modzidzimutsa. Simudzasokonezeka ndipo mudzatha kunena kuti: “Eya! Ndinadziwa kuti uku n’kumene ukulowera,” ndiyeno n’kupereka yankho lokonzekera. Uwu ndiye mtengo wokonzekera.

Kukonzekera kuyenda

Momwemo, zokambirana zimapitilira monga momwe mwafotokozera pokonzekera. Mumayamba ndi kuyang'ana zokonda, kuyesa kudziwa zomwe mbali iliyonse ikufuna. Kenako mumakambirana zosankha zosiyanasiyana, kufunafuna njira zokwaniritsira zofuna za onse awiri. Mukuyang'ana mitundu yosiyanasiyana ya mgwirizano wachilungamo kuti muthetse zotsutsana. Ndipo potsiriza, mumasinthanitsa malingaliro, kuyesera kuti mukwaniritse mgwirizano wopindulitsa womwe uli bwino kwa onse awiri kusiyana ndi kugwiritsa ntchito NAOS yanu.

Komabe, m'dziko lenileni, zoyesayesa zanu zophatikizira mdani wanu munjira yolumikizirana yothetsa mavuto zimakumana ndi machitidwe amphamvu, malingaliro audani, malo okhwima, kusakhutira kwakukulu komanso kukakamizidwa mwaukali. Ntchito yanu ndikusintha masewerawa ndikusintha kuchoka pamikangano kupita pamavuto olumikizana, kutembenuza mdani wanu kukhala mnzake wokambirana. Tsopano popeza muli ndi mapu abwino okhala ndi njira yopita ku cholinga chanu, muyenera kugwiritsa ntchito njira yopambana kuti mugonjetse zopinga zomwe zikutsekereza njira yanu. Mitu isanu yotsatirayi ikukonzekera kukonzekera kuyenda.

II. Kugwiritsa Ntchito Njira Yopambana

1. Osachitapo kanthu

Kwerani mmwamba pa khonde

Lankhulani mukakwiya ndipo mudzalankhula mawu omveka bwino omwe mudzanong'oneza bondo kwa moyo wanu wonse.

Ambrose Beers

Ngati muyang'anitsitsa momwe anthu amalankhulirana wina ndi mzake, mudzapeza zitsanzo zambiri za machitidwe osaganizira mawu a interlocutor. Tsoka ilo, zokambirana zambiri zimakhala motere:

MWAMUNA (poganiza kuti waika maganizo ake pa vuto): Wokondedwa, tifunika kuchitapo kanthu panyumba. Khola lenileni la nkhumba.

MKAZI (kuzitenga ngati kuukira): Simukufuna ngakhale kudzikweza chala! Simuchita ngakhale zomwe munalonjeza. Usiku wapita…

MWAMUNA (momudula mawu): Ndikudziwa. Ndikudziwa. Basi…

MKAZI (osamvetsera): …munalonjeza kuti mudzachotsa zinyalala. Ndipo m’mawa ndinayenera kunyamula ndekha.

HUSBAND (kuyesa kubwerera ku vuto): Osaima. Ndimangofuna kunena kuti tonse…

MKAZI (osamvetsera): Ndipo inali nthawi yako yotengeranso ana kusukulu.

MWAMUNA (mokwiya): Tamverani! Ndinawafotokozera kuti ndinali ndi kadzutsa ka bizinesi.

MKAZI (akufuula): Ndiye nthawi yako ndiyofunika kuposa yanga? Inenso ndimagwira ntchito! Ndatopa ndikukhala pambali nthawi zonse!

MWAMUNA (anayamba kulira): Khalani chete! Ndipo ndani amalipira ndalama zambiri?

Pakukangana uku, ngakhale zofuna za mwamuna, yemwe akufuna kuwona dongosolo m'nyumba, kapena zofuna za mkazi, yemwe akufuna thandizo lochulukirapo ndi ntchito zapakhomo, sakhutira. Koma zimenezi sizilepheretsa banjali. Zochita zimayambitsa zomwe zimachitika, zomwe zimayambitsa kuyankha, ndipo mkangano umapitilirabe. Malingana ndi zochitika zomwezo, mkangano pakati pa ogwira nawo ntchito umayamba kuti ndani adzakhala ndi ofesi kumapeto kwa korido, komanso mkangano pakati pa mabungwe ogwira ntchito ndi oyang'anira zokhudzana ndi mgwirizano wa ogwira ntchito, kapena mkangano wachigawo pakati pawo. mafuko.

Zinthu zitatu zachilengedwe

Anthu ndi makina ochitira zinthu. Munthawi yovuta, mwachibadwa timachita mokhazikika, ndiko kuti, popanda kuganiza. Nayi mitundu itatu yodziwika bwino yamachitidwe.

kugunda kumbuyo. Mukakumana ndi zigawenga zochokera kumbali inayo, mwachibadwa mumathamangira kumbuyo kuti muukire, ndikubwereranso. - molingana ndi mfundo yakuti "monga momwe zimakhalira, zimayankha." Ngati adani anu atenga malo ovuta komanso okhwima, mumachita chimodzimodzi.

Nthawi zina yankho lotere limasonyeza adani anu kuti mutha kusewera mofanana ndikuwaletsa. Koma nthawi zambiri, njira yotereyi imabweretsa kukangana kopanda pake komanso kowononga ndalama. Mwakuyankha kwanu, mumalungamitsa khalidwe losalolera la mdani wanu. Iye akuganiza kuti, “Ndinkaganiza kuti mukufuna kunditenga. Ndipo umboni ndi uwu.” Izi nthawi zambiri zimatsatiridwa ndi kuchuluka kwa mikangano - mkangano, kukakamizidwa kwamakampani, milandu, kapena nkhondo.

Mwachitsanzo, lingalirani mmodzi wa atsogoleri a kampani amene apanga njira yatsopano yopangira zidziwitso. Kukhazikitsidwa kwa dongosololi kumafuna chilolezo cha otsogolera mabizinesi m'dziko lonselo. Chivomerezo choterocho chinaperekedwa ndi atsogoleri onse, kupatulapo mkulu wa fakitale yaikulu kwambiri ku Dallas, yemwe anati: “Sindikufuna kuti anthu anu azindisumira m’nkhani zanga. Ndiyenera kukhala ndi udindo pazonse zomwe zikuchitika pano. Ndingathe popanda inu. " Atakhumudwa ndi kukanaku, wopanga makinawo adawopseza kuti adandaula kwa pulezidenti wa kampaniyo, koma izi zidakwiyitsanso mkuluyo. Zotsatira: pempho kwa pulezidenti wa kampaniyo linali ndi zotsatira zosiyana, kusonyeza kuti wopanga zidziwitso sangathe kupeza chinenero chofanana ndi anzake. Komanso, pulezidenti anakana kulowerera mkanganowo, ndipo dongosolo latsopano lachidziwitso linakhalabe ntchito.

Pobwezera, simungathe kukwaniritsa zokonda zenizeni, ndipo maubwenzi anthawi yayitali amatha kuwonongeka. Mukapambana pankhondoyo, mudzagonja.

Vuto lina nlakuti anthu amene amagwiritsa ntchito mphamvu nthawi zambiri amadziwa zimene akuchita. N’zotheka ndithu kuti akungoyembekezera kubwezera. Pololera kukukwiyitsani, mumayamba kuchita masewera awo motsatira malamulo awo.

Perekani. Chosiyana ndi kubwezera ndicho kulolera. Mbali inayo ingakuikeni m’mavuto moti mungagonje, ngati kungothetsa nkhaniyo mwamsanga. Amakukakamizani, akukunenerani kuti mwaletsa mgwirizano. Kodi mukufuna kuyimbidwa mlandu pazokambirana kwanthawi yayitali, maubwenzi owonongeka, ndi mwayi wophonya kamodzi kokha? Si bwino kungovomerezana ndi otsutsa?

Anthu ambiri amapanga mapangano ndiyeno m’maŵa mwake amamenya pamphumi pawo, akumafuula mothedwa nzeru kuti, “Ndingakhale bwanji wopusa chonchi? Ndinavomera chiyani? Ambiri aife timasaina mapangano - mwachitsanzo, pogula galimoto - osawerenga zolemba zosindikizidwa pang'ono. Chifukwa chiyani? Chifukwa chakuti wogulitsa ali pamwamba pa malingaliro athu, ana amafuna kupita kunyumba ndi galimoto yatsopano, ndipo tikuwopa kuti tidzawoneka opusa ndikufunsa mafunso okhudza mgwirizano womwe sitingathe kuupeza.

Kuloledwa nthawi zambiri kumabweretsa zotsatira zosasangalatsa. Mwasiyidwa ndi malingaliro osasangalatsa akuti "wakunyinyirika". Komanso, pochita izi mumalungamitsa khalidwe loipa la mbali yotsutsana ndikukhala ndi mbiri yofooka, yomwe otsutsa anu apano ndi amtsogolo sadzalephera kupindula nawo. Mofanana ndi kuti kutengeka maganizo kwa ana kumangolimbitsa khalidwe lotere la mwana, kugonjera munthu waukali kumadzetsa mkwiyo m’tsogolo. Mwina khalidwe loipa la bwana kapena kasitomala likuwoneka kuti silingalamulire kwa inu, koma izi siziri choncho - khalidwelo likhoza kulamulidwa. N'zokayikitsa kuti apanga zonyansa zomwezo kwa akuluakulu awo.

Nthawi zina timasochera ndikuyamba kukondweretsa munthu wosadziletsa, kudzitonthoza tokha ndi chinyengo chakuti kuvomereza kungatithandize kumuchotsa kamodzi kokha, ndipo sitidzafunikanso kuchita naye. Komabe, nthawi zambiri anthu oterowo amabwerera, kufuna kupatsidwa chilolezo chatsopano. Ndipotu mtendere uli ndi vuto lake. Ndizopanda pake kuyembekezera kuti podyetsa nyama ya nyalugwe mudzamupanga kukhala wamasamba.

Kuthetsa ubale. Chinthu chachitatu chimene chimachitika mwachibadwa ndicho kusiya kucheza ndi munthu kapena makampani amene ndi ovuta kuchita nawo. Timasudzula mwamuna kapena mkazi wathu, kusiya ntchito, kapena kusiya ntchito yogwirizana.

Nthawi zina njira imeneyi imapindulitsa. Zimachitika kuti ndi bwino kusiya maubwenzi aumwini kapena amalonda kusiyana ndi kuchititsidwa manyazi kapena kulowa m’mikangano yosatha. Nthawi zina, kusiyana kumathandiza kuyika wotsutsayo, ndipo amayamba kuchita zinthu mwanzeru.

Komabe, zonse zakuthupi ndi zamaganizo za kusiyana ndizokwera kwambiri. Uku ndi kutayika kwa kasitomala, kugwa kwa ntchito kapena kutha kwa banja. Nthawi zambiri, kutha kwa ubale kumachitika chifukwa chakuthamangira, komwe timanong'oneza bondo pambuyo pake. Aliyense wa ife ali ndi anzake amene, atakhumudwitsidwa ndi bwana kapena mwamuna kapena mkazi wake, amathetsa maubwenzi mwamsanga popanda kudzipatsa mpata wowongolera. Nthawi zambiri amatanthauzira molakwika khalidwe la mdaniyo ndipo samayesa kumvetsetsa. Chizoloŵezi chothetsa maubwenzi chimachititsa kuti chiyimire - simudzapindula chilichonse, ndipo muyenera kuyambiranso.

Kuopsa kwachibadwa

Mwachibadwa, timayiwala zokonda zathu. Ganizirani za kuyankha kwa Pentagon pavuto laukapolo la Iran la 1979-1981.

Atangogwidwa, mtolankhani adafunsa mkulu wa Pentagon thandizo lomwe asitikali angapereke kuti amasule. Mkuluyo anayankha kuti chilichonse chingaike pangozi miyoyo ya nzika za ku America. Pentagon, adapitilizabe, ikupanga njira zolimba zomwe ziyenera kuchitidwa pambuyo pomasulidwa kwa ogwidwawo. Koma kuganiza kwake n’kopanda tanthauzo. Chifukwa chiyani ophunzira aku Iran amamasula ogwidwawo ngati akudziwa motsimikiza kuti kubwezera ku United States kudzatsatira? Pentagon idalakwitsa kwambiri posokoneza kubwezera ndi zotsatira.

Kaŵirikaŵiri mbali ina imadalira mwachibadwa chanu. Wozunzidwa woyamba ndi cholinga chanu - khalidwe lofunika kuti mukambirane bwino. Otsutsa akuyesera kukusokonezani ndikukulepheretsani kuganiza bwino komanso momveka bwino. Amafuna kukunyengererani ngati nsomba ndikukupangani kuchita zomwe akufuna. Ndikoyenera kugonja ku malingaliro - ndipo muli pa mbedza.

Kulimba kwa mbali yotsutsa kumadalira kwambiri kuthekera koyambitsa chibadwa mwa inu. Kodi munayamba mwadzifunsapo chifukwa chake gulu laling'ono la zigawenga ku Middle East limatha kukopa chidwi cha dziko lonse lapansi ndikuletsa mtsogoleri wa mphamvu zamphamvu kwambiri padziko lapansi? Kuti muchite izi, ndikokwanira kugwira munthu waku America akuyenda mumsewu. Obedwawo alibe mphamvu iliyonse - ndi momwe anthu aku America amachitira zomwe zimawapangitsa kukhala amphamvu.

ngakhale ngati kuchita mwachibadwa sikukupangitsani kuti mulakwitse kwambiri, zotsatira zake zimakhala zotsutsana ndi kuchitapo kanthu. Funsani mkazi chifukwa chake akukalipira mwamuna wake ndipo mumva yankho: "Chifukwa amandilalatira." Funsani funso lomwelo kwa mwamuna wanu, ndipo adzanena zomwezo: "Chifukwa amandilalatira." Kuchita mwachibadwa kumangowonjezera vutolo. Pamafunika awiri kukangana, monga tango.

Kwerani pa khonde

Ngati mumadana ndi kumva kuti mukuthandizira pakukula kwa machitidwe oyipa ndi kuyankha, ndikufulumira kukutsimikizirani - mutha kuthetsa izi nthawi iliyonse, ndipo osagwirizana. Bwanji? Osachitapo kanthu. Kuyambira pachiyambi cha sayansi, tikudziwa kuti "pazochita zilizonse pali zofanana komanso zosiyana." Komabe, lamulo la Newton limeneli limakhudza zinthu zopanda moyo zokha, osati maganizo a munthu. Zinthu zimayankha. Munthu amatha kudziletsa kuchitapo kanthu.

Nkhani ya O. Henry, «Mkulu wa Redskins,» ndi fanizo lomveka bwino la kuletsa mphamvu kungakhale. Makolo, omwe mwana wawo adabedwa, sanachite chilichonse ndi zofuna za obedwawo. M’kupita kwa nthaŵi, mnyamatayo anasanduka mtolo wa zigawenga, ndipo anali okonzeka kulipira makolo awo kuti atenge mwanayo. Nkhaniyi imasonyeza masewera a maganizo, omwe amatsimikiziridwa ndi zomwe munthu amachita. Popewa kuchita zinthu mwachibadwa, makolowo anawononga mapulani a zigawengazo.

Mukakhala pamavuto, muyenera kubwerera m'mbuyo, sonkhanitsani malingaliro anu ndikuwunika momwe zinthu zilili. Tangoganizani kuti zokambirana zikuchitika pabwalo la zisudzo, ndipo mukupita ku khonde lopachikidwa pamwamba pa siteji. "Balcony" ndi chifaniziro cha gulu la maganizo. Kuchokera pamtunda wa khonde, mutha kusanthula modekha kusamvana, pafupifupi ngati wowonera kunja. Mutha kupereka malingaliro olimbikitsa m'malo mwa onse awiri ndikupeza njira yokhutiritsa pamakanganowo.

Mu luso lakale la ku Japan la lupanga, ophunzira akulimbikitsidwa kuyang'ana mdani wawo ngati kuti ndi phiri lakutali. Samurai Musashi wamkulu adachitcha "kuyang'ana kutali ndi zinthu zapafupi." Tanthauzoli likugwiritsidwa ntchito mokwanira pakuwona kuchokera pa khonde.

Kukwera pakhonde kumatanthauza kudzipatula ku zilakolako zachilengedwe ndi malingaliro.

Pankhani imeneyi, chitsanzo cha Janet Jenkins, yemwe adachita malonda a madola mamiliyoni ambiri kuti agulitse mapulogalamu a pawailesi yakanema ku intaneti ya chingwe, ndi chizindikiro. Patangotha ola limodzi chiyambi cha zokambirana zomaliza ndi woimira chingwe cha intaneti, mtsogoleri wa kampaniyo adalowa muofesi. Iye anadzudzula mankhwala a Janet, kukayikira kukhulupirika kwake, ndipo anafuna kuti zisinthe kwambiri pa mgwirizano. Komabe, Janet adatha kukhala ndi malingaliro ake ndi malingaliro "kupita ku khonde". Iye anazindikira kuti podziteteza kapena kumenyana naye, amangowonjezera moto ndipo sangayandikire pafupi ndi mgwirizano. Choncho anangosiya mkulu wa kampaniyo kuti alankhule. Atamaliza kulankhula mokwiya ndikuchoka, Janet anapepesa kwa mphindi imodzi - mwachiwonekere kuti ayimbe foni, koma kuti akhazikike mtima pansi.

Atabwerera patebulo lokambirana, woimira ma network network adamuyang'ana ndikumufunsa kuti: "Ndiye, kubwerera komwe tidasiyira?" Mwa kuyankhula kwina, anali kumudziwitsa kuti, “Musanyalanyaze zomwe bwana akunena. Anangotulutsa nthunzi. Tiyeni tibwerere ku bizinesi." Janet akanapanda kudziletsa, zokambirana zikadafika patali. Koma iye «anakwera pa khonde» ndipo anatha modekha kutsiriza zokambirana, kupanga pangano.

Muyenera «kupita ku khonde» zokambirana asanayambe - monga kukonzekera. Komanso, m'pofunika pa mwayi woyamba «kupita kwa khonde» mu kukambirana ndondomeko. Khalidwe la mbali yotsutsanayo nthawi zonse limakupangitsani kuchita mwachibadwa. Koma simuyenera kuyiwala kwakanthawi cholinga chomaliza.

Cholinga chanu ndi mgwirizano womwe umagwirizana ndi zokonda zanu kuposa njira yabwino kwambiri. Kuonjezera apo, mgwirizanowu uyeneranso kukwaniritsa zofuna za gulu lotsutsa. Mukakhala ndi cholinga, muyenera kuganizira kwambiri kuti muchikwaniritse. Sizophweka. Mukakwiya kapena mukakhala pakona, mumafuna kukalipira mdani wanu. Kukhumudwa ndi mantha zimayambitsa chikhumbo chosiya ndi kuchoka. Momwe mungathanirane ndi zomwe mwachita mwachilengedwe?

Tchulani masewerawo

Nthawi zambiri mumatanganidwa kwambiri ndi zomwe zikuchitika moti simudziwa zomwe mukuchita. Chifukwa chake, ntchito yanu yoyamba ndikumvetsetsa machenjerero a mbali ina. Makolo athu akutali ankakhulupirira kuti n’zotheka kuthetsa mzimu woipa poutchula dzina. Zomwezo zimagwiranso ntchito pazachinyengo zachinyengo - zizindikireni ndipo adzataya mphamvu zawo.

Mitundu itatu ya machenjerero

Machenjerero ndi ambiri, koma onse akhoza kugawidwa m'magulu atatu: kudziletsa, mwaukali, ndi kusokeretsa.

Kutsekereza. Njira zolepheretsa ndikukana kuvomereza kulikonse. Mbali yotsutsanayo ingakutsimikizireni kuti ilibe malo ochitirapo kanthu ndi kuti chimene iwo angasankhe ndicho kusankha kwawo. Kutsekereza kungatenge mawonekedwe a fait accompli: "Zomwe zachitika zachitika. Palibe chomwe chingasinthidwe. ” Nthaŵi zina wotsutsayo amanena za lamulo la kampani kuti: “Sindingathe kukuthandizani. Ndi ndondomeko ya kampani." Ndikothekanso kupempha zomwe zidachitika m'mbuyomu: "Ndinalonjeza kusiya udindo wa mtsogoleri wa bungweli ngati sindipeza chiwonjezeko chachisanu ndi chitatu." Mbali inayo ikhoza kuchedwa kuchedwa: "Tidzakulumikizani." Kapena mudzamva mawu amtundu: "Monga mufuna. Mwina simungavomereze.” Iwo amakana kupereka kwina kulikonse.
Zowukira. Kuwukira ndi machitidwe aukali omwe amapangidwa kuti akuwopsyezeni mpaka mutagwirizana ndi zomwe mdani wanu akufuna. Mwina njira yodziwika bwino yowukira ndi kuwopseza kuti angakuchititseni ngati simuvomereza zomwe akufuna: "Gwirizanani, kapena ayi ..." Wina akhoza kutsutsa zomwe mwapereka ("Nambala zanu sizikuwonjezera!"), Luso lanu (“ Ndiwe watsopano paudindowu, sichoncho?”), udindo wanu ndi ulamuliro wanu (“Tikufuna kulankhula ndi amene amapanga zisankho!”). Wochita zankhanzayo adzakunyozani, kukunyozani ndi kukukwiyitsani mpaka atapeza njira yake.
Zidule. Subterfuge ndi njira yomwe imapangidwa kuti ipeze ndalama mwachinyengo. Pankhaniyi, mbali inayo imagwiritsa ntchito chidaliro chanu - mumawona otsutsawo moona mtima komanso owona mtima. Chimodzi mwa zinyengo izi ndikusokoneza deta, ndiko kuti, kugwiritsa ntchito manambala abodza, okwera kapena osagwirizana. Chinyengo china ndi «kusowa ulamuliro», kumene wotsutsa amayesa kukutsimikizirani kuti ali ndi ulamuliro woyenera, ndipo atatha kulandira maulamuliro kuchokera kwa inu, amanena kuti wina amapanga zisankho. Chinyengo china chimatchedwa «zowonjezera», pamene mbali inayo imapanga zofuna zina pambuyo potsimikizira kuti mgwirizano wakwaniritsidwa.

Zindikirani Njira

Kuti muthane bwino ndi machenjerero a mdani wanu, muyenera kuwazindikira.. Ngati mumvetsetsa kuti mbali inayo ikugwiritsa ntchito njira za filibuster, ndiye kuti simungakhulupirire kuti alibe kusinthasintha. Mutazindikira kuukiridwa munthawi yake, simudzakhala wogwidwa ndi mantha komanso kusamva bwino, ndipo mutawona chinyengocho pakapita nthawi, simudzagwa chinyengo.

Tiyeni tifotokoze zimenezi ndi chitsanzo.

Bambo ndi Mayi Albin anali atangogulitsa kumene nyumba yawo—kapena ankaganiza choncho pamene ankalongedza katundu wawo kuti asamukire. nyumba yake. Komanso, iye anakana kupereka chipukuta misozi ku banja la Albin chifukwa cha kuchedwa. Iwo nawonso anati asakasaka wogula wina. “Mukudziwa,” a Meloni anayankha, “ndinu mwamwayi kuti mukuchita nane. Pangakhale ena amene angakusuzeni chifukwa chofuna kugulitsa nyumbayo kwa wina. Mlanduwo ukhoza kupitirira kwa zaka zambiri, ndipo nthawi yonseyi katundu wanu adzakhala womangidwa ...

Bambo Albin atasanzikana ndi a Meloni anapumira m’mwamba n’kuuza mkazi wawo kuti, “Tikuthokoza Mulungu chifukwa sangasumire. Kupanda kutero tikanakhala kuno kwa zaka zambiri. Mwina mupatseni pang'ono? Akazi a Albin anayankha kuti: “Wokondedwa, wachita mantha kwambiri, ndipo sunazindikire n’komwe. Ayenera kuimbidwa mlandu ndipo tiyenera kuthana naye moyenera. ” Bambo Albin anachita zomwe Bambo Meloni anachita ndendende zomwe Bambo Meloni ankafuna chifukwa cha mantha. Koma Mayi Albin adatha kupondereza maganizo awo pamene adazindikira masewerawo.

Nthawi zambiri, zanzeru izi zimapambana chifukwa cha kusadziwa kwanu. Tiyerekeze kuti kasitomala wakuuzani kuti wasangalala ndi mgwirizanowo, koma mnzakeyo sasayina mgwirizano popanda kusintha kwakukulu. Osazindikira kuti akugwiritsa ntchito mnzake ngati «munthu woyipa», mutha kuvomereza mosalakwa kusintha kwa mgwirizano. Pozindikira machenjerero a mbali ina, mudzakhala tcheru.

Chovuta kwambiri kuzindikira mabodza. Muyenera kufufuza chisokonezo - pakati pa mawu a otsutsa ndi zonena kapena zochita zawo zam'mbuyo, mawonekedwe a nkhope, mawonekedwe a thupi, mawu omveka, ndi zina zotero. Onama amadziwa kuwongolera mawu, koma kuwongolera chisangalalo chomwe chimasintha kamvekedwe ka mawu ndikovuta kwambiri. Ndizovutanso kuwongolera mawonekedwe a nkhope yanu - mwachitsanzo, kumwetulira kwa wabodza kumatha kutuluka kokhota. Komabe, kumbukirani kuti nkhaŵa ingayambitsidwe ndi zifukwa zina ndipo chizindikiro chimodzi chokha sichingadalire. Muyenera kuyang'ana gulu la zizindikiro.

Kuwona machenjerero a mdani wanu kumatanthauza kukhala tcheru, koma osati kukayikira kwambiri. Nthawi zina khalidwe la munthu limangoganiziridwa molakwika. Chimodzi mwa zithunzi zodziwika kwambiri za ndale m'mbiri yaposachedwa ndi Pulezidenti wa Soviet Nikita Khrushchev akugwedeza nsapato yake pa nsanja pakulankhula kwake ku UN mu 1960. pa podium akhoza, popanda kukayikira, kugwiritsa ntchito chida cha nyukiliya. Zaka makumi atatu pambuyo pake, mwana wa Khrushchev Sergei anafotokoza kuti izi sizinali zomwe abambo ake ankaganizira. Khrushchev, yemwe anali asanakhalepo kunja kwa Soviet Union, anamva kuti a Kumadzulo amakonda mikangano yoopsa ya ndale. Choncho anaonetsa omvera zimene ankaganiza kuti akufuna kuziona. Amene analipo anadabwa, ndipo Khrushchev mwiniyo anadabwa kwambiri ndi izi. Amangoyesa kuoneka ngati "bwenzi lake". Zomwe zakhala zofanana ndi kusadziŵika kwa anthu a ku Russia kwenikweni zinali zotsatira za kusamvana komwe kulipo pakati pa anthu a zikhalidwe zosiyanasiyana.

Chifukwa chake, muyenera kuyatsa radar, koma osavala zida. M'maganizo zindikirani chiwembu chomwe chingachitike kapena kuwukira mozemba. Chisalowerera ndale ndi chidziwitso ndikuchiganizira ngati chotheka, osati ngati chowonadi chosatsutsika. Yang'anani umboni wowonjezera, pokumbukira kuti otsutsa ovuta sakhala ndi njira imodzi yokha.