Ichi si chisankho chopanda kulingalira, osati mongoganiza chabe. Atakhala limodzi kwa zaka zambiri, akumapatsana pafupifupi gawo limodzi mwa magawo atatu a moyo wawo, anaganiza zochoka. N’chifukwa chiyani anthu awiri amasiyana akadutsa pamoto, madzi ndi mapaipi amkuwa? Nanga mungatani kuti zimenezi zisakuchitikireni?
Ngati zimenezi zachitikira munthu wina amene mumamudziwa kapena inuyo, dziwani kuti simuli nokha. Ichi chikukhala chizoloŵezi chodziwika kwambiri padziko lonse lapansi. Mwachitsanzo, mmodzi mwa anayi amene amasudzulana ku America ali ndi zaka zoposa 50, ndipo mwayi woti anthu a msinkhu wotha kusudzulana ndi wowirikiza ndendende mmene analili m’ma 1990.
Kwa abwenzi ndi abale, izi nthawi zambiri zimakhala zodabwitsa, koma timawona kusudzulana koteroko pakati pa anthu komanso pakati pa omwe takhala tikuwadziwa bwino kwa zaka zambiri. N’chifukwa chiyani zimenezi zikuchitika?
1. Anapatukana pang'onopang'ono. Njira yomwe imatsogolera kusudzulana kwasiliva imachedwa. Zonse zimachitika pang'onopang'ono. Zili ngati mbale zosasweka zomwe mungathe kuponya, ngakhale mutagwetsa bwanji, palibe chomwe chimachitidwa. Koma ma microcracks ena amakhalabe, pali ochulukirapo a iwo. Ndiyeno nambala yawo imakhala yovuta, mumagwetsa mbale - ndipo imasweka. Choncho zili mu maubwenzi.
Ambiri mwa anthu amene anapatukana kumapeto kwa moyo wawo amanena kuti anangosiyana kalekale, n’kupita kosiyana.
Penapake pansi, pafupi ndi pansi, pamakhala kuzizira kosalekeza, kusakhutira. Siziwoneka kwa aliyense, koma kukhudza kwake kozizira kumamveka ndi omwe amakhala pamodzi nthawi zonse. Kusakhutitsidwa kumeneku ndi kupsa mtima pang'onopang'ono kumatha kusokoneza ndikuwononga zomwe zikuwoneka zolimba pamwamba.
Nthawi zambiri amayi amamva kuti akupereka mochulukira: kusiya ntchito zawo, osatenga tchuthi, ndikusunga. Ndipo zikuwoneka kwa iwo kuti muubwenzi alibe wina womudalira. Ndipo iwo, osati amuna, asankha kuchoka, atalera ana.
2. Kusiyana kwa zaka kumawonekera kwambiri. Nthawi zina zaka zimayamba kuchitapo kanthu, ngakhale mutakumana koyamba, kusiyana kumawoneka ngati kocheperako. Izi ndizochitika zodziwika bwino zamaganizidwe - kusiyana kwa zaka khumi pamibadwo yosiyana kumawoneka ngati kosaneneka (woyamba giredi ndi omaliza maphunziro!), Kapena wopanda pake (msungwana wazaka 20 ndi mnyamata wazaka 30). ).
45 ndi 60 anali kamodzi kokha 20 ndi 35. Ndipo tsopano ziwerengerozi zikuyimira vuto la midlife ndi zizindikiro zoyamba za ukalamba.
Nthawi zonse mukakumana ndi zovuta, mumafuna kubwerera ku zakale, komwe zonse zinali zodziwika bwino komanso zodziwika bwino.
Kangapo m'miyoyo yawo, akufotokoza Stephen Tatkin, PhD, anthu amadutsa m'maganizo ndi zamoyo "kusintha" kwa ubongo. Izi zimachitika ali ndi zaka 15, ndi zaka 40.
Nthawi zonse mukakumana ndi zovuta, mumafuna kubwerera ku zakale, komwe zonse zinali zodziwika bwino komanso zodziwika bwino. Pachifukwa ichi, anthu amayamba maubwenzi ndi okondedwa awo aang'ono kwambiri kuposa iwowo - amawathandiza kuti azikhala nthawi yotentha dzuwa lachilimwe.
3. Amadzilola kumasuka. Pokhala pafupi ndi munthu yemweyo maola 24 pa tsiku, masiku 7 pa sabata, timazolowerana ndikukula kukhala wina ndi mnzake. Koma nthawi zina zimachititsa kuti anthu asiye kuyesera.
Mumagwira ntchito molimbika, mukukulitsa bizinesi yanu, ndipo mumapezera ndalama zothandizira banja lanu, koma mwasiya kugwira ntchito mwakhama kuti mukhale bwenzi loganizirana komanso munthu wokongola. Munadzilola nokha kumasuka.
4. Ndalama zimapeza mtengo wosiyana. Kusiyanasiyana kwa kagwiritsidwe ntchito ka ndalama kumawonekera kwambiri pamene mungafunike kukhala osamala kwambiri ngati zosankha sizili zazikulu monga momwe zilili m'zaka zapakati.
5. Kugonana. Pamene mukukalamba, kusintha kwa mahomoni kumachitika, ndipo izi zingakhudze momwe wokondedwa wanu amakuwonerani. Kapena kugonana kumasiya kukhala chinthu chokhacho chomwe chinagwirizanitsa awiriwa ndikukusungani pamodzi.
Nthawi zina kusiyana kwa khalidwe la kugonana kumakhala kosaoneka bwino ndipo kutha kugwirizana ndi wina ndi mzake kumawonekera, okwatirana amakhala pamodzi monga mabwenzi apamtima. Nthawi zina, m'malo mwake, m'modzi wa iwo kufunika kogonana kumawonjezeka mwadzidzidzi.
Mukufuna chiyani kuti izi zisakuchitikireni?
1. Pangani ubale wanu chofunika kwambiri. Kumatanthauza kutetezana wina ndi mnzake - pamaso pa aliyense, komanso ngakhale mutakhala nokha. Khalani odziwa wina ndi mzake, phimbani misana. Ana akukula, ntchito yatha, tsopano mwatsala nokha, ndipo ndinu gulu limodzi.
2. Dzisamalireni nokha. Kulemera, kukhazikika kunyumba ndi kuvala mumayendedwe a «home chic» si njira yoyenera. Uwu ndi uthenga kwa okondedwa wanu kuti simusamalanso. Dzisamalireni nokha ndi iye.
3. Dziwani gawo lanu pakusamvana. Koma musamafulumire kutaya mtima n’kungoganiza zothetsa banja. Yang'anani pagalasi. Ngati munawona munthu wotopetsa, wotopa m'chithunzichi, mwinamwake mbali ina ya vuto ili ndi inu? Ndipo ngati ndi choncho, pangani chisankho - kubwezeretsa chidwi ku moyo wanu. Ulendo watsopano - ngakhale mutasankha kukulitsa mavwende amitundu yosiyanasiyana - apanga nkhani yatsopano yokhudza banja lanu. Zatsopano komanso zosangalatsa.
4. Kambiranani za kugonana. Thupi lanu likusintha, kugonana kwanu kukutenga mitundu yosiyanasiyana. Pezani mokhudzana, madzulo opanda phokoso limodzi, mwachikondi ndi kumwetulira. Simungathe kubwereza usiku wokonda kwambiri, koma akadali nanu - m'makumbukiro.
5. Ndi china chilichonse. Muzikambirana chilichonse. Iyi ndi njira yokhayo yothetsera mavuto.