Mfundo 8 za momwe mwamuna wokondana ndi mkazi amamvera

Moni okondedwa owerenga mabulogu! Zomwe mwamuna wachikondi amamva ndi chinsinsi kwa akazi ambiri. Nthawi zina zimakhala zovuta kumvetsa zomwe zikuchitika kwa iye, makamaka ngati ali wosungidwa ndi laconic. Koma lero tidzachotsa chophimba chachinsinsi. Ndidzakuuzani za zizindikiro zomwe mungathe kudziwa ngati munakwanitsa kupambana mtima wake, kapena ngati ali waulemu ndi inu, kuchita luso lonyamula katundu ndikuwonjezera kudzidalira. Choncho tiyeni tiyambe.

8 mfundo za chikondi cha mwamuna

Chikondi ndicho chofunika kwambiri kwa munthu aliyense. Ndipo maubwenzi ndi njira yovuta kwambiri yomwe imabweretsa chisangalalo ndi zowawa, zokhumudwitsa, ndi zowononga. Zilibe kanthu kuti munthuyo ndi wamtundu wanji. Ndipo ziribe kanthu momwe akuyesera kuti apewe kuzunzidwa, popanda ubwenzi ndi chikondi, moyo wake siwolemera komanso wodzaza. Tiyeni tiwone momwe oimira theka lachimuna laumunthu amachitira ngati wina angakwanitse kupambana mtima wawo.

Choncho, zizindikiro zodziwika kwambiri ndi izi:

kulolerana

Anthu ndi osiyana. Nthawi zina kusiyana kumeneku kwa anthu otchulidwa ndi zokonda kumakhala koonekeratu, ndipo ndikofunikira kuti muthe kupeza zotsutsana, kukambirana ndi kuvomerezana wina ndi mzake. Izi ndi ngati wokondedwayo ndi wofunikira, ndipo pali chikhumbo chokhala ndi ubale ndi iye. Choncho, zikatere, timakhala ololera. Ngakhale sitikumvetsetsa zokonda ndi zokhumba za wokondedwa. Mwachitsanzo, ngati mnyamata akuvomera kuonera melodrama girly, ngakhale kuti iye sangataye nthawi pa icho mwachinyengo chilichonse - iye amangofuna kusangalatsa inu ndi kukhala pafupi. Ngakhale atakwiya kapena kutsutsa poyamba, komabe adakhala pansi kuti awonere - ichi ndi chochitika chomwe chimalankhula za mtengo wanu kwa iye.

Iye ndi wokonzekanso kupirira zolakwa zanu. Ndiko kuti, osati kuchoka kukafunafuna china chabwinoko, koma kukhala pafupi ndikuyesera kukhazikitsa kulumikizana kuti mumvetsetse. Koma simuyenera mwapadera kumukonzera mkwiyo kuti muyese kuleza mtima ndi kuwona mtima kwamalingaliro. Kotero inu chiopsezo kutaya ubwenzi, ngati wakwanitsa kupanga, ndi malo ake.

Chilengedwe

Chikondi chimalimbikitsa ndi kulimbikitsa. Pali mphamvu zambiri zomwe mukufuna kuzizindikira. Osati kokha ku chiwonongeko, monga ndi kudzikundikira ndi kusunga maganizo oipa, koma kwa chilengedwe, chilengedwe cha kukongola. Ndi chifukwa chake ambiri amapeza maluso atsopano ndi luso mwa iwo okha. Mwachitsanzo, wina angayambe kulemba ndakatulo kapena nyimbo, ngakhale kuti panalibe chidwi ndi nkhaniyi kale. Wina amalenga ndi manja awo zinthu zamkati, nthawi zina ngakhale mipando.

Kotero, ngati muwona kuti wosankhidwayo akuyaka ndi chikhumbo chofuna kulenga kukongola, kapena anangogwira ntchito yake ndi chidwi ndi kulimbana nazo mopepuka, dziwani kuti munatha kumugonjetsa.

ntchito

Mukakuwonani, "amayaka", maso ake amawala, ndipo kumwetulira sikumachoka pa nkhope yake? Izi ndi zotsatira za zotsatira za thupi la mahomoni omwe amamasulidwa akagwa m'chikondi. Dopamine imawonjezera kumverera kwachisangalalo, kukhutira. Ndi chifukwa chake anthu amanena kuti ngakhale poganiza za wokondedwa wawo, zikuwoneka kuti ali "m'mwamba wachisanu ndi chiwiri ndi chisangalalo."

Serotonin imawonjezera kamvekedwe ka minofu, zomwe nthawi zina zimapangitsa kuti kusuntha kuwoneke ngati kosokoneza. Ndipo munthu samawoneka ngati akudzipezera yekha malo panthawi yopatukana ndi chinthu chopembedzedwa. Koma zimachitika kuti, mosiyana, zimasiya kupangidwa, ndiyeno chisoni chimawuka, kuopa kutaya wokondedwa. Matendawa ndi opweteka kwambiri komanso amawononga thanzi. Popeza zambiri chuma anathera kudzisunga wabwinobwino osati mantha. Pangakhalenso malingaliro opyola malire, nsanje yopanda maziko.

Adrenaline imawonjezera ntchito, zomwe zimakupangitsani kufuna kusuntha mapiri, ndipo zikuwoneka kuti mapiko amamera kumbuyo kwanu. Endorphins amakuthandizani kuti mukhale ndi mtendere, mgwirizano komanso chisangalalo. Zimatithandizanso kukhala ndi zolinga komanso kudzidalira. Mwa njira, iwo amakula mwachangu panthawi yogonana ndi mnzanu, ndipo nthawi zambiri zimachitika, kugwirizana kwanu kumakhala kolimba.

Oxytocin imalimbikitsa kupanga chiyanjano. Wokondedwa wanu akhoza kukhala wochepa maganizo m'mawonetseredwe ake kwa inu, koma izi sizikutanthauza kuti wasiya kukonda. Anangodekha ndipo tsopano ali ndi chidaliro mu kukhazikika kwa ubale, chifukwa chake kukoma mtima kumabwera m'malo oyendetsa galimoto komanso chisangalalo chochuluka. Chifukwa chake, musathamangire kuganiza za kusaona mtima kapena kusazindikira, mwina ichi ndi chizindikiro chakuti "amapuma mosagwirizana ndi inu."

Mawonetseredwe osalankhula

Pali chikhumbo chokhudza wokondedwayo nthawi zambiri momwe zingathere. Ndipo ngati si aliyense amene angakwanitse kugula zinthu zoterezi pachiyambi, ndiye kuti, panthawi yamaluwa a maswiti, ndiye kuti kukhudza kumakhala "mwachisawawa". Angayesere kukhala pafupi kwambiri ndi inu, kukukhudzani manja, tsitsi, ndi zina zotero mosadziwa. Akhozanso kukunyengererani pamaso panu ndi kuyesa kukhala mowongoka. Ana asukulu adzakulitsidwa, ndipo zala za nsapato ndi nsapato zidzatembenuzidwira kumbali yanu. Mutha kudziwa zambiri za mawonekedwe osagwiritsa ntchito mawu podina ulalowu.

Kuwonetsa kusayanjanitsika

Musakhulupirire, koma nthawi zina, pamene mwamuna amakonda kwambiri mkazi, amayesa kutsindika kudziimira kwake komanso kusamukonda. Apa m’pamene zimakhala zovuta kuzindikira mmene akumvera. Ndipo mungamvetse bwanji apa, kunamizira, kapena kusasamala kwenikweni? Pali chenjezo limodzi - adzayesa kukhala m'munda wake wamasomphenya nthawi zonse. Ngakhale atayima ndi nsana wake, cham’mbali n’kumanamizira kuti ali wotanganidwa ndipo osaona aliyense pafupi, amangomuyang’ana mosadziwa. Izi mwina ndi mantha ndi kudzikayikira, manyazi, kapena njira yotero yokopa chidwi. Momwe mungakwiyire mtsikana kuti afune kumunyengerera.

Msampha woterewu kwa anthu omwe amafuna kusangalatsa amuna kapena akazi anzawo komanso kukopa chidwi. Kuonjezera apo, amayi nthawi zambiri amatopa ndi kuyamikiridwa kwa banal ndikuyesera kuti adziwe. Ndipo kuti akumbukire, kuti awonekere, anyamata ayenera kukhala ochenjera. Amasankha njira zosiyanasiyana, mpaka masewera omwe samawona kukongola ndi kukongola kwa dona wapafupi.

Kulondola pakugwira ndi malingaliro ongoganizira

Mukakumana ndi anthu, ndizofala kuwonetsa mikhalidwe yokopa komanso yovomerezeka ndi anthu. Ndipo izi ndizabwinobwino. Makamaka pamene interlocutor ndi chidwi ndipo mukufunadi kumukonda kuti kudzutsa chikhumbo kukumana kachiwiri. Zochepa. Pali, ndithudi, kuchotserapo pamene kuwongoka ndi khalidwe lochititsa chidwi kwambiri. Koma munkhaniyi, mudzadziwitsidwa nthawi yomweyo zomwe mumatulutsa. Ngati muwona kuti munthuyo akuchokadi, akuyesera kusonyeza luso lake lonse ndi makhalidwe ake abwino, onetsetsani kuti "mum'kola".

Kupadera ndi kufunikira

Mkazi amene mwamuna ali naye pachibwenzi amamva kukhala wapadera, wofunidwa. Kupatula apo, ndi momwe zilili. Iye ndi wapadera kwa iye. Mmodzi mwa miliyoni, ngakhale alibe zodzoladzola kapena mawonekedwe owoneka bwino komanso khungu lopanda chilema. Chikondi chopanda malire, ndiko kuti, ziribe kanthu, chingaperekedwe ndi makolo okha. Koma mu maunansi apamtima, anthu amayamikirana ngakhale chifukwa cha zophophonya zimene zimawasiyanitsa ndi ena onse. Choncho, ngati amakusamalirani, ndipo mumamasuka pamaso pake, osaopa kukhala weniweni, ndiye kuti muli ndi mwayi kwambiri.

chidwi

Ngati amasamala za momwe mudakhalira tsiku lanu, ndizabwino. Koma nthawi zina anthu amachita chidwi ndi nkhani za mnzake mwaulemu kapena chifukwa chongofuna kudziwa. Koma ngati akufunsani za mapulani amtsogolo, kumapeto kwa sabata, tchuthi, tchuthi, pamapeto - iyi ndi foni yabwino. Amafuna kuyanjana, amafuna kukhala pafupi ndikukhala ndi inu nthawi yopumula. Amakuphatikizani m'moyo wake, osati kungoyesa kukwaniritsa kugonana. Mwa njira, ngati pambuyo paubwenzi samataya chidwi ndi inu, koma amakhala, m'malo mwake, wachifundo komanso watcheru, kapena sasintha khalidwe, ichi ndi chizindikiro chabwino.

Kutsiliza

Ndipo ndizo zonse za lero, owerenga okondedwa! Kuti mumvetse bwino zomwe kwenikweni theka lachimuna likuyang'ana mu ubale ndi mkazi. Komanso, ndi mtundu wanji wosankhidwa womwe anthu ambiri amalota, ndikupangira kuti muwerenge nkhaniyi. Mmenemo mudzapeza mfundo zothandiza zomwe zingathandize kukopa chidwi cha mnyamata yemwe mumakonda. Kotero kupambana kwa inu, ndipo, ndithudi, chikondi chogwirizana ndi chowala!

Nkhaniyi inakonzedwa ndi katswiri wa zamaganizo, Gestalt Therapist, Zhuravina Alina.