Ana amasiku ano ndi osiyana ndi mibadwo yakale: sangathe kudziletsa ndipo sadziwa momwe angaletsere maganizo. Kodi mungawaphunzitse bwanji kusamalira khalidwe lawo? Malangizo ochokera kwa mtolankhani komanso katswiri wa zamaganizo Katherine Reynolds Lewis.
Zizolowezi zachizoloŵezi, monga «khalani ndikuganiza za khalidwe lanu» ndi njira yabwino yakale yopindulitsa, sagwira ntchito ndi ana amakono. Tangoganizani kuti mwana wanu sanathe kukwera njinga kupita kumalo oyimitsa ndi kubwerera - kodi mungamutumize kuti "akhale pansi ndikuganiza" yekha pa izi? Inde sichoncho. Choyamba, izi ndizopanda pake: mwanayo ayenera kukulitsa mgwirizano ndi mgwirizano, ndipo chilango sichidzamuthandiza pa izi. Kachiwiri, mwanjira iyi mudzamuchotsera mwayi wodabwitsa wophunzirira ... kuphunzira.
Ana sayenera kutengera mphotho ndi zilango. M’malo mwake, makolo ayenera kuphunzitsa ana awo kudziletsa, kuphatikizapo chitsanzo. Nchiyani chingathandize ndi izi?
Support
Dziwani zinthu zimene zingakhudze khalidwe la mwana wanu: kukhala wotanganidwa kwambiri, kusowa tulo kapena mpweya wabwino, kugwiritsa ntchito zipangizo zamakono mopitirira muyeso, kusadya bwino, kuphunzira, kusamalidwa bwino kapena kusokonezeka maganizo. Ntchito yathu monga makolo si kukakamiza ana kuchita zonse bwino. Tifunika kuwapatsa ufulu wowonjezereka ndi udindo, kuwaphunzitsa zimene zimafunika kuti zinthu ziyende bwino, ndi kuwalimbikitsa pamene alephela. Musaganize kuti: "Ndingamulonjeza chiyani kapena kumuopseza kuti azichita bwino?" Ganizirani: "Mukufuna kumuphunzitsa chiyani pa izi?"
Lumikizanani
Chisoni cha anthu otizungulira - makamaka amayi ndi abambo - komanso kukhudzana kwakuthupi kumatithandiza tonse kudziletsa bwino. Kulankhulana ndi mwana mmodzimmodzi, kulimbikitsana, zosangalatsa za mlungu ndi mlungu za banja lonse, ntchito zapakhomo pamodzi, ndi kuvomereza thandizo la mwanayo kapena zokonda zake (m’malo mwa “kutamandani mwachisawawa”) n’zothandiza kuti mukhalebe ogwirizana. Ngati mwanayo wakhumudwa, choyamba bwezeretsani kukhudzana ndikuchitapo kanthu.
Kukambiranako
Ngati mwana ali ndi vuto, musalithetse nokha. Ndipo musanene kuti mukudziwa chomwe chalakwika: mverani kaye mwanayo. Lankhulani naye mwaulemu monga mmene mungachitire ndi mnzanu. Osaumiriza, osakakamiza malingaliro anu, koma gawana zambiri.
Yesani kunena kuti «ayi» pang'ono momwe mungathere. M'malo mwake, gwiritsani ntchito "pamene ... ndiye" ndi zitsimikizo zabwino. Musamatchule mwana wanu. Pofotokoza khalidwe lake, onetsetsani kuti mwatchula makhalidwe abwino amene munaona. Ndemanga za khalidwe linalake kapena chipambano zingalimbikitse mwanayo kuchitapo kanthu, pamene "kutamanda kwakukulu" kungabweretse mavuto.
Malire
Zotsatira za zochita zina ziyenera kuvomerezedwa pasadakhale - mwa kuvomerezana komanso kulemekezana wina ndi mnzake. Zotsatira zake ziyenera kukhala zokwanira zolakwazo, zodziwika pasadakhale komanso zogwirizana ndi khalidwe la mwanayo. Msiyeni aphunzire kuchokera pa zomwe zinamuchitikira.
Ntchito
Pangani mwanayo kukhala ndi udindo wa gawo la ntchito zapakhomo: kutsuka mbale, kuthirira maluwa, kuyeretsa nazale. Homuweki nthawi zambiri imakhala pa udindo wake. Ngati sukulu ikufunsani zambiri, lankhulani ndi mphunzitsi kapena thandizani mwanayo kukambirana motere (zowona, muyenera kumvetsetsa pasadakhale ngati kukambirana koteroko kuli komveka).
luso
Musamaganizire kwambiri za kupambana mu maphunziro, masewera, ndi zaluso komanso zambiri pa kasamalidwe ka malingaliro, kuchitapo kanthu mwanzeru, ndi luso la moyo. Thandizani mwana wanu kudziwa zomwe zingathandize kuti akhazikike mtima pansi: ngodya yabata, masewera olimbitsa thupi, opotapota kapena mpira wopanikizika, kukambirana, kukumbatirana, kapena zina.
Khalidwe loyipa ndi "udzu" womwe umakula ngati "muukulitsa" ndi chidwi chanu. Osalakwitsa izi. Ndi bwino kuzindikira zochitika pamene mwanayo amachita momwe mungafune.
Gwero: C. Lewis «Good News About Bad Behaviour» (Career Press, 2019).