Kudzikonda ndi magwero a ubwino ndi ulemu. Ngati malingalirowa sali okwanira, ubalewo umakhala wolamulira kapena umamangidwa molingana ndi mtundu wa "wozunzidwa-wozunza". Ngati sindidzikonda ndekha, sindingathe kukonda wina, chifukwa ndimayesetsa kukondedwa ndekha.
Ndiyenera kupempha «kuwonjezeredwanso» kapena kusiya kumverera kwa munthu winayo chifukwa ndilibe zokwanira. Mulimonsemo, zidzakhala zovuta kwa ine kupereka chinachake: popanda kudzikonda ndekha, ndikuganiza kuti sindingathe kupereka chilichonse chofunika komanso chosangalatsa kwa wina.
Iye amene sadzikonda yekha, poyamba amagwiritsa ntchito, ndiyeno amawononga kukhulupirirana kwa mnzakeyo. "Wopereka chikondi" amachita manyazi, amayamba kukayikira ndipo pamapeto pake amatopa kutsimikizira zakukhosi kwake. Ntchito yosatheka: simungapatse wina zomwe angadzipatse yekha - kudzikonda yekha.
Munthu amene sadzikonda kaŵirikaŵiri amafunsa mosadziwa mmene wina akumvera kuti: “N’chifukwa chiyani akufunikira zinthu zopanda moyo ngati ine? Chifukwa chake ndi woyipa kwambiri kuposa ine! ” Kusadzikonda kungabwerenso m’njira ya kudzipereka kwaukali, kutengeka maganizo ndi chikondi. Koma kutengeka maganizo koteroko kumaphimba kufunikira kosakhutiritsidwa kwa kukondedwa.
Chifukwa chake, mayi wina adandiuza momwe amavutikira ndi ... manenedwe achikondi osalekeza a mwamuna wake! Panali nkhanza zobisika zamaganizo mwa iwo zomwe zinathetsa chirichonse chomwe chingakhale chabwino mu ubale wawo. Atasiyana ndi mwamuna wake, anataya makilogalamu 20, omwe adapeza kale, akuyesa kudziteteza ku zolakwa zake zoopsa.
Ndine woyenera kulemekezedwa, kotero ndine woyenera kukondedwa
Chikondi cha munthu wina sichingathetse kusakonda kwathu tokha. Monga ngati pansi pa chivundikiro cha chikondi cha wina mukhoza kubisa mantha anu ndi nkhawa! Pamene munthu sadzikonda yekha, amalakalaka chikondi chenicheni, chopanda malire ndipo amafuna kuti mnzakeyo amusonyeze umboni wowonjezereka wa malingaliro ake.
Mwamuna wina anandiuza za bwenzi lake lachibwenzi, amene anamzunza kwenikweni ndi malingaliro, kuyesa unansiwo kuti ukhale wolimba. Mayiyu ankawoneka kuti amamufunsa nthawi zonse kuti, "Kodi udzandikondabe ngakhale nditakuchitira zoipa ngati sungathe kundikhulupirira?" Chikondi chopanda ulemu sichimapanga munthu ndipo sichikwaniritsa zosowa zake.
Inenso ndinali mwana wokondedwa, chuma cha amayi anga. Koma adapanga ubale ndi ine kudzera m'malamulo, zachinyengo komanso zowopseza zomwe sizinandilole kuti ndiphunzire kudalira, kuchita zabwino komanso kudzikonda. Ngakhale kuti amayi ankandikonda, sindinkadzikonda ndekha. Ndili ndi zaka XNUMX ndinadwala ndipo ndinafunika kulandira chithandizo kuchipatala. Kumeneko ndinakumana ndi namwino yemwe (kwa nthawi yoyamba m'moyo wanga!) anandipatsa kumverera kodabwitsa: Ndine wofunika - momwe ndiriri. Ndine woyenera kulemekezedwa, zomwe zikutanthauza kuti ndine woyenera kukondedwa.
Panthawi ya chithandizo, si chikondi cha wothandizira chomwe chimathandiza kusintha maganizo ake, koma khalidwe la ubale umene amapereka. Ndi unansi wozikidwa pa kukomerana mtima ndi kukhoza kumvetsera.
N’chifukwa chake sinditopa kubwerezabwereza: mphatso yabwino kwambiri imene tingapereke kwa mwana si kumukonda kwambiri mpaka kumuphunzitsa kudzikonda.