Njira yopezera moyo wabwino ndi kuchitira ena chifundo. Zimene mumamva pa Sande sukulu kapena nkhani ya Chibuda tsopano zatsimikiziridwa mwasayansi ndipo zingalingaliridwe monga njira yovomerezedwa mwasayansi yopezera chimwemwe. Pulofesa wa Psychology Susan Krauss Whitborn amalankhula zambiri za izi.
Chikhumbo chofuna kuthandiza ena chingakhale m’njira zosiyanasiyana. Nthawi zina, kusalabadira kwa mlendo ndikothandiza kale. Mutha kukankhira kutali lingaliro lakuti “lolani wina achite” ndi kufikira munthu wodutsa m’njira amene akupunthwa m’mphepete mwa msewu. Thandizani kuyang'anira munthu yemwe akuwoneka wotayika. Uzani munthu wodutsa pafupi kuti nsapato yake yamasulidwa. Zochita zing'onozing'ono zonsezi ndizofunikira, atero pulofesa wa psychology wa pa University of Massachusetts Susan Krauss Whitbourne.
Pankhani ya mabwenzi ndi achibale, thandizo lathu lingakhale lofunika kwambiri kwa iwo. Mwacitsandzo, m’bale anathimbana na nyatwa pa basa, ife tisagumana ndzidzi toera kumwa khofi toera kumphedza toera kulonga na kumwaza mphangwa. Mnansi wina akulowa pakhomo ndi zikwama zolemera, ndipo timamuthandiza kunyamula chakudya kupita ku nyumbayo.
Kwa ena, zonsezi ndi gawo la ntchito. Ogwira ntchito m'sitolo amalipidwa kuti athandize ogula kupeza zinthu zoyenera. Ntchito ya madokotala ndi psychotherapists ndiyo kuthetsa ululu, m'thupi ndi m'maganizo. Kutha kumvetsera ndikuchita zinazake kuthandiza osoŵa mwina ndi mbali yofunika kwambiri ya ntchito yawo, ngakhale kuti nthawi zina imakhala yolemetsa.
Chifundo vs chifundo
Ochita kafukufuku amakonda kuphunzira chifundo ndi kudzikonda osati chifundo chokha. Aino Saarinen ndi anzake a pa yunivesite ya Oulu ku Finland ananena kuti, mosiyana ndi chifundo, chimene chimaphatikizapo kutha kumvetsetsa ndi kugaŵana maganizo abwino ndi oipa a ena, chifundo chimatanthauza “kudera nkhaŵa masautso a ena ndi chikhumbo chowathetsera. ”
Ochirikiza maganizo abwino akhala akuganiza kuti kutengeka kwa chifundo kuyenera kuthandiza kuti anthu azikhala ndi moyo wabwino, koma derali lakhalabe losawerengeka. Komabe, asayansi aku Finnish amatsutsa kuti pali kugwirizana pakati pa makhalidwe monga chifundo ndi kukhutitsidwa kwa moyo wapamwamba, chisangalalo ndi maganizo abwino. Makhalidwe ngati chifundo ndi kukoma mtima, chifundo, kusaganizira ena, kudzikonda, kudzimvera chisoni kapena kudzivomereza.
Kafukufuku wam'mbuyomu wokhudza chifundo ndi mikhalidwe yake yofananira wavumbulutsa zododometsa zina. Mwachitsanzo, munthu amene amamvera chisoni anthu mopambanitsa komanso wosakonda zinthu zambiri amakhala pachiwopsezo chachikulu chodwala matenda ovutika maganizo chifukwa “kuchita chifundo pa anthu ena amene akuvutika kumawonjezera kupsinjika maganizo ndiponso kumakhudza munthuyo molakwika, pamene kuchita chifundo kumamukhudza bwino.”
Tiyerekeze kuti mlangizi amene wayankha foniyo limodzi ndi inuyo, mwayamba kukwiya kapena kukhumudwa chifukwa cha mmene zinthu zilili zoipa.
M’mawu ena, pamene timva zowawa za ena koma osachitapo kanthu kuti tichepetseko, timayang’ana mbali zoipa za zimene takumana nazo ndipo tingadzimve kukhala opanda mphamvu, pamene chifundo chimatanthauza kuti tikuthandiza, osati kungoyang’ana mwachidwi kuvutika kwa ena. .
Susan Whitburn akuwonetsa kukumbukira zomwe zidachitika titalumikizana ndi othandizira - mwachitsanzo, omwe amapereka intaneti. Mavuto amalumikizidwe pa nthawi yosayenera akhoza kukukwiyitsani kwambiri. “Tiyerekeze kuti mlangizi amene wayankha foniyo pamodzi ndi inu anakwiya kapena kukhumudwa chifukwa cha mmene zinthu zilili. N’zokayikitsa kuti adzatha kukuthandizani kuthetsa vutolo. Komabe, izi sizingachitike: nthawi zambiri, amafunsa mafunso kuti adziwe vutoli ndikupereka njira zothetsera vutoli. Pamene chilumikizanocho chikhoza kukhazikitsidwa, ubwino wanu udzawongoka, ndipo, mosakayika, iye adzamva bwino, chifukwa adzapeza chikhutiro cha ntchito yochitidwa bwino.
Kafukufuku wanthawi yayitali
Saarinen ndi ogwira nawo ntchito adaphunzira kugwirizana pakati pa chifundo ndi ubwino mozama. Mwachindunji, adagwiritsa ntchito deta kuchokera ku kafukufuku wadziko lonse omwe adayamba mu 1980 ndi 3596 achichepere aku Finns obadwa pakati pa 1962 ndi 1972.
Kuyesedwa mkati mwa dongosolo la kuyesera kunachitika katatu: mu 1997, 2001 ndi 2012. Panthawi yoyesedwa komaliza mu 2012, zaka za ochita nawo pulogalamuyi zinali pakati pa 35 mpaka 50 zaka. Kutsata kwa nthawi yayitali kunalola asayansi kuti azitha kuyang'anira kusintha kwa chifundo ndi miyeso ya momwe otenga nawo mbali akuyendera bwino.
Kuti ayese chifundo, Saarinen ndi anzake adagwiritsa ntchito njira yovuta ya mafunso ndi ziganizo, zomwe mayankho ake adakonzedwanso ndikufufuzidwa. Mwachitsanzo: “Ndimasangalala kuona adani anga akuvutika”, “Ndimasangalala kuthandiza ena ngakhale atandichitira nkhanza” komanso “Sindimadana ndi kuona wina akuvutika”.
Anthu achifundo amapeza chithandizo chochulukirapo chifukwa amakhala ndi njira zolankhulirana zabwino.
Miyezo yakukhala bwino m'maganizo imaphatikizapo mawu ambiri monga: "Nthawi zambiri, ndimakhala wokondwa", "Ndili ndi mantha ochepa kusiyana ndi anthu amsinkhu wanga." Mulingo wosiyana waumoyo wabwino umaganizira za chithandizo chomwe anthu amachiwona ("Ndikafuna thandizo, anzanga amandipatsa nthawi zonse"), kukhutitsidwa ndi moyo ("Kodi mwakhutitsidwa bwanji ndi moyo wanu?"), thanzi laumwini ("Muli bwanji thanzi poyerekezera ndi anzanga?”), ndi kukhala ndi chiyembekezo (“Muzochitika zosamveka bwino, ndikuganiza kuti zonse zidzathetsedwa m’njira yabwino kwambiri”).
Kwa zaka zambiri za phunziroli, ena mwa omwe adatenga nawo mbali asintha - mwatsoka, izi zimachitika mosakayikira ndi ntchito zanthawi yayitali. Amene anafika komaliza kwenikweni anali aja amene anali achikulire kumayambiriro kwa ntchitoyo, amene sanasiye sukulu, ndipo anachokera m’mabanja ophunzira a gulu lapamwamba la anthu.
Chinsinsi cha moyo wabwino
Monga momwe zinanenedweratu, anthu omwe ali ndi chifundo chachikulu amakhalabe ndi thanzi labwino komanso lachidziwitso, chikhutiro cha moyo wonse, chiyembekezo, ndi chithandizo. Ngakhale kuwunika kwaumoyo wa anthu oterowo kunali kokulirapo. Zotsatirazi zikusonyeza kuti kumvetsera ndi kukhala wothandiza ndi zinthu zofunika kwambiri kuti munthu akhale ndi moyo wabwino.
Panthawi yoyesera, ofufuzawo adawona kuti anthu achifundo iwo eni, adalandira chithandizo chochulukirapo, chifukwa "amasunga njira zolankhulirana zabwino. Ganizirani za anthu amene mumasangalala nawo. Mwachionekere, amadziŵa kumvetsera mwachifundo ndiyeno kuyesa kuthandiza, ndipo samawonekanso kuti ali ndi chidani ngakhale kwa anthu osakondweretsa. Mwina simungafune kukhala paubwenzi ndi munthu wokuthandizani wachifundo, koma simungafune kuthandizidwa nthawi ina mukadzakumana ndi vuto. ”
"Kukhoza kuchitira chifundo kumatipatsa zopindulitsa zazikulu zamaganizidwe, zomwe sizimangowonjezera kukhazikika kwamalingaliro, thanzi, komanso kudzidalira, komanso kukulitsa ndi kulimbikitsa maukonde a abwenzi ndi othandizira," akufotokoza mwachidule Susan Whitbourne. M’mawu ena, asayansi atsimikizira mwasayansi zimene afilosofi akhala akulemba kwa nthaŵi yaitali ndi zimene ochirikiza zipembedzo zambiri amalalikira: kuchitira ena chifundo kumatipangitsa kukhala achimwemwe.
Za Mlembi: Susan Krauss Whitborn ndi pulofesa wa zamaganizo pa yunivesite ya Massachusetts komanso wolemba mabuku 16 a psychology.