Ndidamva kufuna kukankha, ndipo mwana wanga wamkazi adatuluka thupi lonse! Mwamuna wanga ankanamizira kuti sachita mantha
Ndili ndi zaka 32, ndinabereka mwana wanga wachitatu, nditaimirira ndekha m'khitchini yanga ... Sizinakonzedwe! Koma inali nthawi yabwino kwambiri pa moyo wanga!
Kubadwa kwa mwana wanga wachitatu kunali kosangalatsa kwambiri! Pa nthawi ya mimba yanga, ndinapanga ziganizo zazikulu, monga kupita ku makalasi obala nthawi zonse popanda ululu, kupempha epidural, mwachidule zonse zomwe sindinachite kwa mphindi yanga yachiwiri. Ndipo ndinanong'oneza bondo kuti kubalako kunali kovutirapo. Ndi zigamulo zabwinozi, ndinali wodekha, ngakhale makilomita 20 omwe adandilekanitsa kuchokera kumalo osungirako amayi ankawoneka ngati ambiri kwa ine. Koma hei, kwa awiri oyambirirawo, ndinali nditafika panthaŵi yake ndipo zimenezo zinandilimbikitsa. Kutatsala masiku khumi kuti abadwe, ndinamaliza kukonza zinthu za mwanayo, ndili wodekha. Ndinali wotopa, ndizowona, koma kuti ndisakhale bwanji nditatsala pang'ono kutha ndipo ndimayenera kusamalira ana anga azaka 6 ndi 3. Ndinalibe minyewa, ngakhale yaying'ono bwanji, yomwe ikanandichenjeza. Koma tsiku lina madzulo ndinatopa kwambiri ndipo ndinagona msanga. Ndiyeno, cha m’ma 1:30 m’mawa, ululu waukulu unandidzutsa! Kudumpha kwamphamvu kwambiri komwe sikunawoneke ngati kufuna kuyimitsa. Atangomaliza kumene, mikwingwirima ina iwiri yamphamvu kwambiri inafika. Kumeneko ndinazindikira kuti ndidzabereka. Mwamuna wanga adadzuka ndikundifunsa chomwe chikuchitika! Ndinamuuza kuti aimbire foni makolo anga kuti abwere kudzasamalira ana, makamaka kuimbira ozimitsa moto chifukwa ndinadziŵa kuti mwana wathu akubwera! Ndinaganiza kuti mothandizidwa ndi ozimitsa moto, ndidzakhala ndi nthawi yopita kumalo oyembekezera.
Chodabwitsa, ine amene ndili ndi nkhawa, ndinali Zen! Ndinkaona kuti ndili ndi chinachake choti ndikwaniritse ndipo ndiyenera kulamulira. Ndinadzuka pabedi langa kukatenga chikwama changa, kukonzekera kupita kuchipinda cha amayi. Ndinali ndisanafike kukhitchini, kukomoka kwatsopano kunandilepheretsa kuyika phazi limodzi kutsogolo. Ndinali nditagwira patebulo, osadziwa choti ndichite. Chilengedwe chinandipangira ine: Ndinadzimva ndekha ndikunyowa, ndipo ndinamvetsetsa kuti ndikutaya madzi! Chakutalilaho, ngwaputukile kulinangula chikuma. Ndinali chiyimire, nditagwira mutu wamwana wanga. Kenako, ndinamva kulakalaka kukankha: Ndinatero ndipo thupi lonse la mwana wanga wamkazi linatuluka! Ndinamukumbatira ndipo analira mwachangu kwambiri zomwe zinandilimbitsa mtima! Mwamuna wanga, yemwe ankanamizira kuti sachita mantha, anandithandiza kugona pa matailosi ndi kutikulunga m’bulangete.
Ndinamuyika mwana wanga wamkazi pansi pa t-shirt yanga, khungu mpaka khungu, kuti akhale wofunda komanso kuti ndimumve kuti ali pafupi kwambiri ndi mtima wanga. Ndinali ngati wazizindikiro, wosangalala pamene ndinadzimva kukhala wonyada kuti ndinabala m’njira yachilendo imeneyi, popanda kuchita mantha ngakhale pang’ono. Sindinadziwe kuti padutsa nthawi yochuluka bwanji. Ndinali mumthovu wanga… Komabe, zonse zomwe zidachitika mwachangu: ozimitsa moto adafika ndipo adadabwa kundiwona ndili pansi ndi mwana wanga. Zikuoneka kuti ndinkamwetulira nthawi zonse. Dokotalayo anali nawo ndipo ankandiyang’anitsitsa, makamaka kuti aone ngati ndikutaya magazi. Anamuyeza mwana wanga n’kudula chingwe. Ozimitsa motowo ndiye anandiyika m’galimoto yawo, mwana wanga akadali wotsutsana nane. Ndinaikidwa pa IV, ndipo tinapita kuchipinda cha amayi oyembekezera.
Nditafika, anandiika m’chipinda chogwirira ntchito chifukwa nkhokwe inali isanatuluke. Anandichotsera chip changa, ndipo pamenepo ndinapenga ndikuyamba kulira pamene ndinali wodekha modabwitsa. Mwachangu ndinadekha chifukwa azamba anandipempha kuti ndikankhire mphuno. Panthaŵiyo, mwamuna wanga anabweranso ndi mwana wathu, yemwe anamuika m’manja mwake. Atationa chonchi, anayamba kulira chifukwa anakhudzidwa mtima, komanso chifukwa zonse zinatha bwino! Anandipsompsona ndikundiyang'ana monga momwe anali asanandichitirepo: “Wokondedwa, ndiwe mkazi wapadera kwambiri. Kodi mukuzindikira zomwe mwachita kumene! Ndinkaona kuti amandinyadira, ndipo zimenezi zinandithandiza kwambiri. Mayeso anthawi zonse atatha, anatiika m’chipinda momwe tonse atatu tinatha kukhalamo. Sindinatope kwenikweni ndipo zinandisangalatsa mwamuna wanga kundiona chonchi, ngati kuti palibe chodabwitsa chimene chinachitika! Pambuyo pake, pafupifupi onse ogwira ntchito pachipatala anabwera kudzalingalira za "chodabwitsa", ndiko kunena kuti ine, mayi yemwe anabala atayima pakhomo pa mphindi zochepa!
Ngakhale lero, sindikumvetsetsa zomwe zidandichitikira. Palibe chomwe chidandipangitsa kuti ndibereke mwachangu, ngakhale mwana wachitatu. Koposa zonse, ndidapeza mwa ine zinthu zosadziwika zomwe zidandipangitsa kukhala wamphamvu, wodzidalira ndekha. Ndipo koposa zonse, kawonedwe ka mwamuna wanga pa ine kasintha. Sandiwonanso ngati mkazi wamng'ono wosalimba, amanditcha "heroine wanga wokondedwa" ndipo izi zatibweretsa pafupi.