Mwana wanga ali m'chikondi

Chikondi chake choyamba

Zaka 3-6: zaka za chikondi choyamba

Ma idyll oyambirira achikondi amabadwa kwambiri mwa ana. "Maganizowa amadza akangoyamba kucheza, azaka zapakati pa 3 ndi 6. Panthawi imeneyi, amakopeka ndi kukonda chidwi", Akufotokoza za psychiatrist ya ana Stéphane Clerget. “Akayamba sukulu, amazindikira kuti amatha kumva chikondi kwa anthu ena osati awo omwe amawasamalira tsiku ndi tsiku: makolo, nanny… Gawoli lisanafike, sakuthamangitsidwa. kuposa iwo okha ndi mabanja awo. “

Kuti ayambe kukondana, ayeneranso kupatsirana Kape ya Oedipus complex ndi kumvetsa kuti sangakwatire kapena kukwatiwa ndi kholo lawo lomwe si amuna kapena akazi anzawo.

Zaka 6-10: abwenzi poyamba!

“Azaka zapakati pa 6 ndi 10, nthaŵi zambiri ana amasiya chikondi chawo. Amayang'ana kwambiri mbali zina zomwe amakonda, zomwe amakonda ... Komanso, ngati maubwenzi okondana atenga malo ochulukirapo panthawiyi, izi zitha kuchitika ndikusokoneza kukula kwa mwanayo. Makolo safunika kulimbikitsa ana awo pa nthaka imeneyi. Tiyenera kulemekeza kuchedwa kumeneku mu chikondi. ”

Sinthani chikondi chachikulu cha ana athu aang'ono

Kumva bwino

Stéphane Clerget anatsindika kuti: “Chikondi choyamba n’chofanana kwambiri ndi chimene anthu achikulire amamva, ndi chilakolako chochepa cha kugonana. "Pakati pa zaka 3 mpaka 6, malingalirowa amapanga autilaini, a chikondi chenicheni kudzoza, yomwe imayikidwa pang'onopang'ono. Ndikofunika kuti musamakakamize ana komanso kuti musamawonetsere zomwe achikulire akukumana nazo pa chikondi ichi. Simuyenera kudziseka kapena kukhala wokonda kwambiri, zomwe zingawalimbikitse kuti adzitseke. ”

Amachulukitsa kugonjetsa

Kodi mwana wanu wamng'ono amasintha wokondedwa wake komanso malaya ake? Kwa Stéphane Clerget, iye osapereka ngongole zambiri ku maubale achibwana awa. "Zitha kuchitika kuti izi zikuwonetsa kuti banja lili ndi nkhawa. Mmodzi mwa odwala anga aang'ono ankakayikira bambo ake kuti ali ndi zibwenzi zakunja ndipo anawamasulira choncho, koma mwana amene amasintha okonda nthawi zambiri sadzakhala wokonda akazi pambuyo pake! Ngati, m'malo mwake, mwana wanu alibe okonda ngati anzake ena, choyamba muyenera kufunsa ngati ali ndi anzake kusukulu. Ndilo lofunika kwambiri. Ngati ali yekhayekha, adzipatula yekha, padzakhala kofunika kuchitapo kanthu kuti amuthandize kulankhulana. Kumbali ina, ngati alibe womukonda chifukwa alibe nazo chidwi, koma ndi wochezeka, palibe chodetsa nkhawa. Zidzabwera pambuyo pake. ”…

Chisoni choyamba

N'zomvetsa chisoni kuti palibe amene akuthawa. Ndizofunikira lingalirani zachisoni izi mozama. Monga momwe Stéphane Clerget akulongosolera, “kutetezera” ana ku mavuto amtima kumakula m’maphunziro onse. Palibe chifukwa chowakonzekeretsa kaye. M’chenicheni, kuli mwa kupeza malire a mphamvu zake zonse, kuyambira ali wamng’ono, m’pamene mwanayo amakonzekeretsedwa bwino kwambiri kaamba ka kupwetekedwa mtima. Ngati adazolowerabe kupatsidwa chilichonse, sakanamvetsetsa kuti wokondedwa wake samukondanso, amachepetsa zilakolako zake ndipo zimakhala zovuta kuti athane nazo. “

Kufotokozera ana kuti simungakakamize mnzanu wamng’ono kusewera nanu komanso kuti muyenera kulemekeza zosankha za wina n’kofunikanso. “Mwana akakumana ndi vutoli, makolo ayenera lankhulani naye, mutonthoze, mulimbikitseni, mubwezereni mtsogolo", Amafotokoza za psychiatrist ya ana.

Woyamba kukopana

Mukalowa ku koleji, zinthu nthawi zambiri zimakhala zovuta kwambiri. Mwana akhoza kudzitsekera m’chipinda chake kuti azicheza kwa maola ambiri pafoni kapena pa Intaneti ndi chibwenzi chake. Kodi mungatani?

“Kaya ndi kukambirana ndi anzanu a m’kalasi kapena chibwenzi chawo, makolo ayenera kuchepetsa nthawi imene amathera pakompyuta kapena pafoni ngakhale kuti amalemekeza mwana wawo. Ndikofunikira pakukula kwake. Akuluakulu ayenera kumuthandiza kuti azichita zinthu zina. “

Kupsompsona koyamba kumachitika zaka 13 ndipo kumayimira sitepe yopita ku kugonana kwa akuluakulu. Koma m'dera lino limene unyamata umakula kwambiri, kodi tiyenera kugwirizanitsa kukopana koyamba ndi kugonana koyamba?

“Makolo ayenera kuphunzitsa ana awo ndi kupanga dongosolo. Ndikofunikira kukonzekeretsa achinyamata ku moyo wawo wamtsogolo wogonana, ndikugogomezera kuti ambiri ogonana ali ndi zaka 15, ndipo mpaka atakhwima, amatha kukopana. “

Kuopa zisonkhezero zoipa, kuchita mopambanitsa… makolo nthaŵi zonse sakonda zibwenzi…

Stéphane Clerget akufotokoza kuti: “Ngati n’chifukwa chakuti simukukonda maonekedwe ake, musamangoganizira za ubwenzi wanu woyamba. Koma makolo ayenera kukhala aulemu ndi kulemekeza zibwenzi zawo. Mulimonse mmene zingakhalire, ngati sakumukonda, ndi bwino kumulandira bwino kuti adziwena naye, kukumana ndi makolo ake. Kulumikizana naye ndi njira yabwino kwambiri yoti achikulire azitha kuwongolera ndikuwona zomwe zikuchitika. ”