Zamkatimu
Zomwe simungamuuze mwana wanu - wama psychologist
Ndithudi inunso mwanenapo chinachake kuchokera mu seti iyi. Chomwe chilipo, tonse ndife opanda uchimo.
Nthawi zina makolo amachita chilichonse kuti mwana wawo apambane m'tsogolo: amawatumiza kusukulu yapamwamba, kulipira maphunziro ku yunivesite yotchuka. Ndipo mwana wawo amakula alibe chochita komanso alibe zochita. Mtundu wa Oblomov, wokhala ndi moyo ndi inertia. Ife, makolo, muzochitika zotere ndizozoloŵera kuimba mlandu aliyense, koma osati tokha. Koma pachabe! Ndipotu zimene timauza ana athu zimakhudza kwambiri tsogolo lawo.
Katswiri wathu wapanga mndandanda wamawu omwe mwana wanu sayenera kumva!
Komanso "musakhudze", "musapite kumeneko". Ana athu amamva mawu awa nthawi zonse. Inde, nthawi zambiri, timaganiza kuti ndi chifukwa cha chitetezo. Ngakhale nthawi zina zimakhala zosavuta kubisa zinthu zoopsa kutali, kuika chitetezo pazitsulo, kusiyana ndi kugawira malangizo nthawi zonse.
- Ngati tiletsa kuchita zinazake, timamulanda mwanayo zochita. Pa nthawi yomweyi, mwanayo samawona "ayi" tinthu tating'onoting'ono. Inu mukuti, “Musachite,” ndipo iye amatero ndipo amalangidwa. Koma mwanayo sakumvetsa chifukwa chake. Ndipo ukam’dzudzula kachitatu, zimakhala ngati chizindikiro kwa iye: “Ndikachita chinthu, ndidzalangidwa. Chifukwa chake mumapanga kusowa kochitapo kanthu mwa mwanayo.
Taonani mmene mnyamatayo alili bwino, osati ngati inuyo. "Anzako onse ali ndi ma A, koma ndiwe chiyani?!".
– Simungayerekeze mwana ndi munthu wina. Izi zimabweretsa kaduka, zomwe sizingakhale zolimbikitsa kuphunzira. Kawirikawiri, palibe nsanje yakuda kapena yoyera, nsanje iliyonse imawononga, imachepetsa kudzidalira. Mwanayo amakula wosatetezeka, nthawi zonse amayang'ana mmbuyo pa miyoyo ya anthu ena. Anthu ansanje adzalephera. Iwo amalingalira motere: “N’chifukwa chiyani ndiyenera kuyesetsa kukwaniritsa chinachake, ngati chilichonse chikugulidwa kulikonse, ngati chilichonse chipita kwa ana a makolo olemera, ngati okhawo amene ali ndi zibwenzi apambana.”
Yerekezerani mwanayo ndi iye yekha: "Tawonani momwe munathetsera vutoli mwamsanga, ndipo dzulo munaliganizira kwa nthawi yaitali!"
“Perekani chidole ichi kwa mchimwene wanu, ndinu wamkulu.” "N'chifukwa chiyani munamubwezera, iye ndi wamng'ono." Mawu oterowo ndi ambiri a ana oyamba kubadwa, koma izi sizipangitsa kuti zikhale zosavuta kwa iwo.
– The mwana alibe mlandu kuti anabadwa kale. Choncho, musalankhule mawu ngati amenewa ngati simukufuna kuti ana anu akule ngati achilendo kwa wina ndi mnzake. Mwana wamkuluyo amayamba kudziona ngati nanny, koma sangakonde mchimwene wake kapena mlongo wake. Komanso, moyo wake wonse adzatsimikizira kuti ndi woyenera kukondedwa kwambiri, m'malo momanga tsogolo lake.
Chabwino, ndiyeno: "Ndiwe wopusa / waulesi / wopanda udindo."
“Ndi mawu ngati awa, umadzutsa wachinyengo. Kudzakhala kosavuta kwa mwana kunama ponena za magiredi ake kusiyana ndi kumvetsera mawu onyoza ena ponena za kuipa kwake. Munthu amakhala ndi nkhope ziwiri, amayesa kukondweretsa aliyense, pamene akuvutika ndi kudzidalira.
Pali malamulo awiri osavuta: "kudzudzula kamodzi, kutamanda zisanu ndi ziwiri", "kudzudzula m'modzi, kutamanda pamaso pa aliyense." Atsatireni, ndipo mwanayo adzafuna kuchita chinachake.
Makolo amanena mawu awa nthawi zambiri, osazindikira. Kupatula apo, tikufuna kuphunzitsa munthu wamalingaliro olimba, osati chiguduli. Chifukwa chake, nthawi zambiri timawonjezera kuti: "Ndiwe wamkulu", "Ndiwe mwamuna."
-Kuletsa kutengeka sikudzabweretsa zabwino zonse. M'tsogolomu, mwanayo sangathe kusonyeza malingaliro ake, amakhala wosasamala. Komanso, kupondereza maganizo kungayambitse matenda somatic: matenda a mtima, matenda a m'mimba, mphumu, psoriasis, shuga komanso khansa.
“Ukadali wamng’ono. Ine ndekha"
Inde, n'zosavuta kuti tizitsuka mbale tokha kusiyana ndi kupereka izi kwa mwana, ndikusonkhanitsa mbale zosweka kuchokera pansi. Inde, ndipo ndi bwino kunyamula zogula kuchokera ku sitolo nokha - mwadzidzidzi mwanayo amapanikizika kwambiri.
-Kodi zotsatira zake ndi zotani? Ana amakula ndipo tsopano iwo eni amakana kuthandiza makolo awo. Nawu moni kwa iwo akale. Ndi mawu akuti “ndisiye, ine ndekha,” “udakali wamng’ono,” timalanda ana ufulu wodzilamulira. Mwana sakufunanso kuchita chinachake payekha, mwa dongosolo. Ana oterowo m’tsogolo sadzamanga ntchito yabwino, sadzakhala mabwana aakulu, chifukwa anazoloŵera kuchita ntchito zimene anauzidwa kuchita.
“Usakhale wanzeru. Ndikudziwa bwino"
Chabwino, kapena ngati kusankha: "Khalani chete pamene akuluakulu akunena", "Simudziwa zomwe mukuganiza", "Simunafunsidwa."
-Makolo omwe amanena izi ayenera kulankhula ndi katswiri wa zamaganizo. Ndipotu, iwo, mwachiwonekere, safuna kuti mwana wawo akhale wanzeru. Mwina makolo amenewa poyamba sankafuna kwenikweni mwana. Nthawi inali kuyandikira, koma simudziwa zifukwa.
Ndipo mwana akamakula, makolo amayamba kusirira luso lake ndipo nthawi iliyonse amayesa ‘kumuika m’malo mwake. Amakula popanda kuchitapo kanthu, ndi kudzikayikira.
“… Ndidzamanga ntchito”, “… kukwatiwa”, “… kupita kudziko lina” ndi zitonzo zina zochokera kwa amayi.
- Pambuyo mawu owopsa, mwanayo kulibe. Iye ali ngati malo opanda kanthu, amene moyo wake suyamikiridwa ndi amayi ake omwe. Ana otere nthawi zambiri amadwala, mwinanso akhoza kudzipha.
Mawu oterowo angayankhulidwe kokha ndi amayi omwe sanadziberekere okha, koma kuti, mwachitsanzo, awononge mwamuna. Amadziona ngati ozunzidwa ndipo amaimba mlandu aliyense chifukwa cha zolephera zawo.
“Ndiwe wofanana ndi bambo ako”
Ndipo potengera kamvekedwe ka mawu omwe mawuwa amanenedwa nthawi zambiri, kufananiza ndi bambo mwachiwonekere sikuli kuyamikira.
- Mawu otere amatsitsa udindo wa bambo. Choncho, atsikana nthawi zambiri amakhala ndi mavuto ndi amuna m'tsogolomu. Mnyamata amene akukula samamvetsa udindo wa mwamuna m’banja.
Kapena: "Sinthani mwachangu!", "Muli kuti mu fomu iyi?!"
-Mawu omwe tikuyesera kugonjetsera mwana tokha. Kusankha zovala zawo kwa ana, timapha chikhumbo chawo cholota, kuthekera kwawo kupanga zisankho ndi kumvetsera zokhumba zawo. Amazolowera kukhala mmene ena amawauzira.
Ndipo ndizofunikira kwambiri osati zomwe timanena kwa mwanayo, komanso momwe timanenera. Ana mosavuta kuwerenga maganizo athu oipa ndi kutenga zambiri mu nkhani yawo.