“Muli ndi lipoti mawa. Gulitsani patebulo! - “Kukayika ndi chinthu, pakadali tsiku lathunthu kutsogolo, kulibwino ndimuimbire mnzanga…” Nthawi zina kukambirana kotere kumachitika mkati mwa chikumbumtima chathu. Ndipo izi sizikutanthauza kuti tili ndi umunthu wogawanika. Ndipo za chiyani?
Lingaliro la subpersonalities linapangidwa mu 1980s ndi akatswiri a zamaganizo Hal ndi Sidra Stone.1. Njira yawo imatchedwa Dialogue with Voices. Mfundo yake ndi yoti tizindikire mbali zosiyanasiyana za umunthu wathu, tizitchula dzina lililonse ndi kuliona ngati lapadera. Dongosolo logwirizanitsa limasintha kwambiri tikamvetsetsa kuti dziko lamkati silingatheke kuzindikirika kamodzi. Izi zimatithandiza kuvomereza dziko lamkati mwachuma chake chonse.
Zigawo za "I" wanga
Katswiri wa zamaganizo Nikita Erin anati: “Munthu ndi wovuta kumvetsa komanso wovuta kumvetsa nthawi imodzi. - Chifukwa chake, ngati tikufuna kumvetsetsa tokha kapena wina, kuti tithandizire ntchitoyi, timayesetsa kusiyanitsa zinthu zadongosolo, ndikuziphatikiza kukhala "Ine ndine munthu ...".
Ndi njira yotereyi "yachiyambi", kutsimikizika kwa malingaliro kumawonjezeka. Ndi chiyani chomwe chili chothandiza kudziwa: kuti "ndiye munthu woti" kapena kuti "amagwira ntchito yabwino, koma momwe amachitira ndi ena sizikugwirizana ndi ine"? Munthu mmodzimodziyo amadziwonetsera yekha m’njira zosiyanasiyana malinga ndi mmene zinthu zilili, malo okhala, maganizo ndi thupi lake.
Monga lamulo, subpersonalities zimayamba ngati njira yotetezera yamaganizidwe. Mwachitsanzo, mwana wosatetezeka wokulira m'banja laulamuliro amatha kukhala ndi umunthu wa "Obediant Baby". Adzamuthandiza kupeŵa mkwiyo wa makolo ake ndi kulandira chikondi ndi chisamaliro. Ndipo umunthu wosiyana, "Wopanduka", adzaponderezedwa: ngakhale akukula, adzapitirizabe kutsata chizolowezi chogonjetsa zilakolako zake zamkati ndikuwonetsa kutsata, ngakhale pamene zingakhale zothandiza kuti azichita mosiyana.
Kuponderezedwa kwa chimodzi mwazinthu zazing'ono kumayambitsa kukangana kwamkati ndikuchotsa mphamvu zathu. Ichi ndichifukwa chake ndikofunikira kwambiri kubweretsa mthunzi (wokanidwa) kuwunikira, akutsindika Nikita Erin.
Tiyerekeze kuti mkazi wamalonda ali ndi "Amayi" woponderezedwa. Masitepe atatu adzakuthandizani kuunika.
1. Kusanthula ndi kufotokozera khalidwe. Ngati ndikufuna kukhala mayi, ndimayesetsa kuganiza komanso kuchita zinthu ngati mayi.
2. Kumvetsetsa. “Kodi kukhala mayi kumatanthauza chiyani kwa ine? Zikukhala bwanji iye?
3. Kusiyanitsa. "Ndimasewera angati osiyanasiyana?"
Ngati subpersonality imayendetsedwa mozama mu chikomokere, chiwopsezo chimawonjezeka kuti pakachitika zovuta zimawonekera ndikuyambitsa chiwonongeko chachikulu m'miyoyo yathu. Koma ngati tivomereza subpersonalities zathu zonse, ngakhale mthunzi, chiwopsezo chidzachepa.
Mtendere ukuyankhula
Sikuti nthaŵi zonse mbali zosiyanasiyana za umunthu wathu zimakhala zogwirizana. Nthawi zambiri pamakhala mkangano wamkati pakati pa Kholo ndi Mwana wathu: awa ndi awiri mwa zigawo zitatu zoyambira za "Ine" zomwe katswiri wa psychoanalyst Eric Berne adafotokoza (onani bokosi patsamba lotsatira).
"Tiyerekeze kuti munthu wina wa ku Child state akufuna kuvina, ndipo kuchokera ku boma la Makolo akukhulupirira kuti ntchito yabwino kwambiri padziko lonse ndi dokotala," anatero katswiri wa zamaganizo Anna Belyaeva. - Ndipo tsopano amagwira ntchito ngati dokotala ndipo samamva kukwaniritsidwa. Pankhaniyi, ntchito zamaganizo ndi iye cholinga kuthetsa kusamvana ndi kulimbikitsa Akuluakulu boma, zomwe zikuphatikizapo luso kusanthula mopanda tsankho ndi kupanga zisankho. Zotsatira zake, pali kuwonjezeka kwa chidziwitso: kasitomala amayamba kuona mwayi wa momwe angachitire zomwe amakonda. Ndipo zosankha zingakhale zosiyana.
Mmodzi adzalembetsa maphunziro a waltz panthawi yake yopuma, winayo adzapeza mwayi wopeza ndalama mwa kuvina ndikusintha ntchito yake. Ndipo wachitatu adzamvetsetsa kuti loto laubwana ili lataya kale kufunika kwake.
Mu ntchito ya psychotherapeutic, kasitomala amaphunzira paokha kumvetsa Mwana wake wamkati, kumukhazika pansi, kumuthandiza, kumupatsa chilolezo. Khalani Kholo Lanu Losamalira ndipo tsitsani voliyumu pa Critical Parent yanu. Yambitsani Mkulu wanu, dzitengereni nokha ndi moyo wanu.
Ma subpersonalities amatha kumveka osati monga maiko a "I" athu, komanso ngati maudindo a anthu. Komanso akhoza kukangana! Motero, udindo wa mkazi wapakhomo kaŵirikaŵiri umasemphana ndi wa katswiri wochita bwino. Ndipo kusankha imodzi mwa izo nthawi zina kumatanthauza kusadzimva ngati munthu wozindikira. Kapena mmodzi wa subpersonalities angayese molakwika chigamulo chomwe chinapangidwa ndi winayo, monga momwe zinachitikira ndi Antonina wazaka 30.
Iye anati: “Ndinakana kukwezedwa pantchito chifukwa ndinkafunika kuthera nthawi yambiri kuntchito komanso ndinkafuna kuona mmene ana athu amakulira. - Koma posakhalitsa ndinaganiza kuti ndikuwononga talente yanga, ndipo ndinamva chisoni, ngakhale kuti sindidzasintha chilichonse. Kenako ndinazindikira kuti maganizo amenewa akundikumbutsa mawu a mayi anga akuti: “Mkazi sangadzipereke ku banja lake!” Ndizodabwitsa kuti kwenikweni amayi sanandidzudzule ngakhale pang’ono. Ndinalankhula naye, ndiyeno “amayi anga am’kati” anandisiya ndekha.
Ndi ndani yemwe
Nkhani iliyonse ndi yapadera, ndipo mikangano yosiyana imabisala kumbuyo kwa kusakhutira. "Kuphunzira kwa mayiko osiyanasiyana a "I" kapena subpersonalities kumathandiza kasitomala kupeza ndi kuthetsa zotsutsana zawo mkati m'tsogolomu," Anna Belyaeva ndi wotsimikiza.
Kuti tidziwe zomwe tili nazo, mndandanda wa mikhalidwe, yabwino komanso yoyipa, ithandiza. Mwachitsanzo: Wokoma Mtima, Wotopa, Wotopa, Wolimbikitsa… Ndi zinthu ziti zomwe mumawonekera nthawi zambiri? Kodi cholinga chanu chabwino ndi chiyani (ndi zabwino zotani zomwe mukundichitira)?
Yesetsani kumvetsetsa zomwe mphamvu zimatulutsidwa panthawi ya subpersonality iyi, tcherani khutu ku zomverera m'thupi. Mwina ena subpersonalities ali overdeveloped? Kodi zikukuyenererani? Ma subpersonalities awa ndiye maziko a umunthu wanu.
Tiyeni tipitirire kwa adani awo. Lembani makhalidwe osiyana ndi amene mungakhale nawo. Mwachitsanzo, subpersonality Dobryak akhoza kukhala chosiyana ndi Zlyuka kapena Egoist. Kumbukirani ngati ma subpersonalities otsutsa adawonekera nthawi iliyonse? Zinali bwanji? Kodi zingakhale zothandiza ngati amawonekera pafupipafupi?
Awa ndi ma subpersonalities anu okanidwa. Afunseni mafunso omwewo monga poyamba. Mudzapeza zilakolako zosayembekezereka mwa inu nokha, komanso maluso atsopano.
wosaoneka
Gulu lachitatu ndi zobisika zobisika, kukhalapo komwe sitikudziwa. Kuti muwapeze, lembani dzina la fano lanu - munthu weniweni kapena munthu wotchuka. Lembani makhalidwe omwe mumasirira. Woyamba mwa munthu wachitatu: “Iye amafotokoza bwino maganizo ake.” Kenako bwerezani mawuwo mwa munthu woyamba kuti: “Ndimalankhula bwino.” Timakhalanso ndi maluso omwe timasilira mwa ena, samveka bwino. Mwina ziyenera kupangidwa?
Kenako lembani dzina la munthu amene amakukwiyitsani, lembani makhalidwe ake amene amakuchititsani kuti musamachite zinthu zolakwika. Izi ndi zolakwika zanu zobisika. Kodi mumadana ndi chinyengo? Ganizirani zinthu zimene munafunikira kuchita mwachinyengo, ngakhale pang’ono. Kodi chinali chifukwa chiyani? Ndipo kumbukirani: palibe amene ali wangwiro.
Siziwoneka kuchokera kunja momwe ma subpersonality athu amachitira. Koma ubale wapakati pawo umakhudza kudzidalira ndi moyo wabwino, kukhazikitsa akatswiri ndi ndalama, ubwenzi ndi chikondi ... Powadziwa bwino ndi kuwathandiza kupeza chinenero chimodzi, timaphunzira kukhala mogwirizana ndi tokha.
Mwana, Wamkulu, Makolo
Katswiri waku America wa psychoanalyst Eric Berne, yemwe adayika maziko a kusanthula kwazinthu, adazindikira zinthu zitatu zazikulu zomwe aliyense wa ife ali nazo:
- Mwana ndi chikhalidwe chomwe chimatilola kuti tigwirizane ndi malamulo, kupusitsa, kuvina, kufotokoza momasuka, komanso kusunga zowawa zaubwana, zosankha zowononga za ife eni, ena ndi moyo;
- Kholo - dziko ili limatithandiza kudzisamalira tokha ndi ena, kulamulira khalidwe lathu, kutsatira malamulo okhazikitsidwa. Kuchokera mu chikhalidwe chomwechi, timadzidzudzula ife eni ndi ena ndikuchita mopambanitsa pa chilichonse padziko lapansi;
- Wachikulire - dziko lomwe limakupatsani mwayi woti muchitepo kanthu pa "pano ndi pano"; zimatengera zochita ndi mikhalidwe ya Mwana ndi Kholo, zomwe zikuchitika pano, zomwe zidamuchitikira ndikusankha momwe angachitire pazochitika zinazake.
Werengani zambiri m'buku: Eric Berne "Masewera Anthu Amasewera" (Eksmo, 2017).
1 H. Stone, S. Winkelman "Kudzivomereza Nokha" (Eksmo, 2003).