Mu moyo nthawi zosiyanasiyana - ndipo nthawi zina nthawi yomweyo! Timakumana ndi mitundu yambiri yankhani zoipa. Pakhoza kukhala zododometsa zambiri panjira: kuchotsedwa ntchito, kutha kwa chibwenzi, kupita padera, kuzindikiridwa modabwitsa ndi dokotala, imfa ya wokondedwa…
Nkhani zoyipa zimatha kukhala zowononga, zokwiyitsa, ndipo nthawi zina zimatembenuza dziko lanu lonse mozondoka.
Kulandira uthenga woipa kungakhudze thupi nthawi yomweyo, kuchititsa kuti "kumenyana kapena kuthawa": adrenaline amalumphira, ndipo maganizo amayamba kuthamanga pakati pa zochitika zoipitsitsa kwambiri.
Mwa zina, mungafunikire kulimbana ndi zotsatira za zochitika zoipa: kufunafuna ntchito yatsopano, kulipira ngongole, kukumana ndi madokotala kapena kuuza anzanu ndi achibale nkhani, ndi kuthana ndi chiyambukiro chakuthupi ndi chamaganizo cha mbiri yoipa pa inu.
Aliyense amachita mosiyana ndi kupsinjika ndi kukhumudwa, koma aliyense amatha kuthana ndi nkhani zoyipa, kupanga njira yothanirana ndi vutoli, ndikupangitsa kuti zinthu zisakhumudwitse. Nawa masitepe 5 kuti muvomereze uthenga woyipa!
1. Landirani maganizo anu oipa
Kulandira uthenga woipa kungayambitse chisokonezo chosatha, chomwe anthu amayamba kukana kuti adziteteze.
Yunivesite ya California ku Berkeley idachita kafukufuku yemwe adawonetsa kuti kupeŵa kutengeka maganizo kungayambitse nkhawa kwambiri kusiyana ndi kulimbana nawo mwachindunji. Ofufuza apeza kuti kuvomereza malingaliro amdima m'malo molimbana nawo kungakuthandizeni kumva bwino m'kupita kwanthawi.
Ophunzira omwe nthawi zambiri amavomereza kukhumudwa kwawo adakumana ndi zochepa pambuyo pake ndipo motero adasintha malingaliro awo poyerekeza ndi omwe adapewa kukhumudwa.
2. Osathawa nkhani zoipa
Monga momwe anthu amapondereza malingaliro olakwika, anthu ambiri amakondanso kupeŵa nkhani zoipa ndikukankhira zonse zomwe zikugwirizana nazo. Koma nthawi zambiri, kupeŵa zomwe zikuchitika panopa sikumveka, ndipo, pamapeto pake, mumangoganizira kwambiri.
Kulimbana ndi chikhumbo chofuna kuganiza za nkhani zoipa kungayambitse kupsinjika kwa m'mimba, mapewa, ndi chifuwa, kutaya mtima, kupsinjika maganizo, mavuto a m'mimba, ndi kulefuka.
Ubongo wanu ndi wabwino kwambiri pothana ndi nkhani zoipa kuposa momwe mukuganizira. Ndi pokonza ndi kugaya zomwe mwakumana nazo kuti mutha kusiya malingalirowa ndikuyamba kupita patsogolo.
Yunivesite ya Tel Aviv ku Israel kuti kukumana mobwerezabwereza ndi chochitika cholakwika kumatha kusokoneza malingaliro ndi malingaliro anu.
Ofufuza amanena kuti ngati, mwachitsanzo, musanayambe kugwira ntchito, mwawerenga nkhani ya m’nyuzipepala yonena za tsokalo, ndi bwino kuwerenga nkhaniyo mosamalitsa ndikudziululira mobwerezabwereza ku chidziwitsochi kusiyana ndi kuyesa kusaganizira za chochitikacho. Kubwereza kubwereza nkhani zoipa kangapo kudzakuthandizani kukhala omasuka komanso okhoza kupitiriza tsiku lanu popanda zotsatirapo zoipa ndikukhala ndi maganizo abwino.
Wina, wochitidwa ndi University of Arizona ku Tucson, amathandiziranso lingaliro la kuwonekeranso. Gululo linapeza kuti m’mikhalidwe imene imadzetsa kupsinjika maganizo kwakukulu, monga ngati kutha kwa chisudzulo kapena chisudzulo, kulingalira kosalekeza pa zimene zinachitika kungathandize kuchira msanga.
3. Onani zomwe zidachitika mwanjira ina
Chotsatira ndikulingaliranso momwe mumawonera chochitikacho. Sizingatheke kulamulira chilichonse chomwe chimatichitikira m'moyo, koma mutha kuyesa kugwiritsa ntchito njira yotchedwa "cognitive reframing" kuti muwongolere zomwe zikuchitika.
Chofunikira ndikutanthauzira chochitika chosasangalatsa mwanjira yosiyana, yabwino, kuwunikira mbali zabwino ndi zowala za chochitikacho.
Mwachitsanzo, ngati mwachotsedwa ntchito, musayese kudziwa chifukwa chake zinachitikira. M’malo mwake, yang’anani mkhalidwewo monga mwaŵi woyesera china chatsopano!
Monga momwe yunivesite ya Notre Dame ku Indiana ikusonyezera, kutaya ntchito ndi kugunda pansi kungakhale chinthu chopindulitsa, kulola anthu kuyamba mutu watsopano m'miyoyo yawo, kukhala ndi zochitika zatsopano za ntchito ndikumasula malingaliro oipa.
Ofufuza a pa yunivesite ya Illinois ku Urbana-Champaign adapeza kuti ndizothandizanso kuyang'ana pazochitika za kukumbukira kolakwika m'malo motengera zomwe zikuchitika. Poganizira za momwe munapwetekera, mwachisoni, kapena mwachita manyazi pazochitika zosasangalatsa, mumadzitsutsa kuti mudzakhala ndi thanzi labwino kwambiri pambuyo pake. Ngati muchotsa malingaliro anu pamalingaliro olakwika ndikuganizira za chikhalidwe - monga bwenzi lomwe linalipo, kapena nyengo ya tsikulo, kapena mbali ina iliyonse yosagwirizana ndi malingaliro - malingaliro anu adzasokonezedwa ndi zomverera zosafunikira.
4. Phunzirani kuthana ndi mavuto
Kulephera mayeso a ku koleji, kukanidwa ntchito, kapena kukhala ndi zochitika zoipa ndi bwana wanu ndi zina mwazochitika zomwe zingayambitse kukhumudwa kapena kudziona kuti ndiwe wolephera.
Pafupifupi aliyense amakumana ndi mavuto amenewa nthawi ina, koma anthu ena amalimbana nawo bwino. Ena amasiya pa chopinga choyamba, pamene ena amakhala ndi mphamvu zomwe zimawathandiza kukhala odekha ngakhale atapanikizika.
Mwamwayi, aliyense akhoza kukhala olimba mtima ndikuphunzira kuthana ndi mavuto potengera malingaliro, zochita, ndi makhalidwe awo.
Izi zinatsimikiziridwa, mwachitsanzo, ndi mmodzi wa ophunzira omwe adalephera m'maphunziro ndipo adapeza kuti mwayi wopita ku msika wa ntchito unali wochepa chifukwa chosowa ziyeneretso. Kafukufukuyu adapeza kuti kuphunzira luso lodziletsa, kuphatikiza kuyika zolinga komanso momwe angasinthire njira yawo pambuyo pa zopinga, zidathandizira ophunzira kubwereranso ndikukhala okonzeka kuyesetsa kuchita bwino m'moyo watsopano komanso kuthana ndi zovuta zilizonse zomwe akukumana nazo.
Ena asonyezanso kuti kulemba mabulogu okhudza nkhani za chikhalidwe cha anthu kungathandize kupirira.
Kulemba nkhani kumadziwika kuti kumathandiza kuthetsa kupsinjika maganizo. Kafukufuku wofalitsidwa ndi American Psychological Association wasonyeza kuti kulemba mabulogu kungakhale njira yabwino yothetsera achinyamata omwe akuvutika.
Poyerekeza ndi achinyamata omwe sanachite kalikonse kapena kusunga zolemba zawo zokha, omwe adalemba mabulogu zamavuto awo adakulitsa kudzidalira, kuchepa kwa nkhawa komanso kupsinjika maganizo.
5. Dzichitireni chifundo
Pomaliza, mukakumana ndi mbiri yoipa yamtundu uliwonse, ndikofunikira kwambiri kudzichitira chifundo ndi kusamalira thanzi lanu lakuthupi ndi lamalingaliro. M'nthawi ya zoopsa, nthawi zambiri timanyalanyaza thanzi lathu mosazindikira.
Idyani chakudya chopatsa thanzi. Musaiwale kudya zakudya zoyenera ndi zipatso ndi ndiwo zamasamba katatu patsiku. Kudya mopanda thanzi kumawonjezera kukhumudwa.
Yesani kusinkhasinkha mwanzeru. Pokonzekera mbiri yoipa, m'malo modzidodometsa kapena kuyesa kukhalabe ndi malingaliro abwino, yesetsani kusinkhasinkha, zomwe zimakulolani kuti muganizire zomwe zikuchitika komanso kuthetsa nkhawa yodikira nkhani.
Lembani kutikita minofu. , yofalitsidwa m’magazini yotchedwa Journal of Clinical Nursing, inapeza kuti mpaka milungu 8 kuchokera pamene wokondedwa wamwalira, kusisita manja ndi mapazi kunali kotonthoza ndipo inali “njira yofunika kwambiri kwa achibale amene ali ndi chisoni.”
Mukakumana ndi nkhani zoipa, ngakhale zitakhala zovuta bwanji, ndikofunikira kukhala chete, kuyang'ana nthawi yomwe ilipo, ndikukumbukira kupuma momasuka.