Malinga ndi otanthauzira mawu, Akatswiri a zamaganizo omwe amagwira ntchito ndi mazana a makasitomala ndikuphunzira zovuta zambiri ndi mavuto amadziwa kuti aliyense akhoza kuchitira kaduka, ndipo ngakhale kuti anthu ambiri amakonda kusirira chuma, pali ena omwe amamva izi poyerekezera ndi maonekedwe a wina. luso, moyo waumwini ngakhale zizolowezi. Komabe, mosasamala kanthu za nkhani ya kaduka, chizoloŵezi cha kaduka sichimabweretsa phindu lililonse, chikhutiro cha makhalidwe kapena chimwemwe. Tiyeni tione bwinobwino chifukwa chake nsanje ili yoipa.
Akatswiri a zamaganizo, atsogoleri achipembedzo, ndi anthu wamba amavomereza kuti kaduka ndi chinthu chowononga chomwe chiyenera kuchotsedwa pa moyo wa chikhalidwe ndi maganizo. Koma nthano zodziwika bwino za kaduka ndi kulimbana nazo zimawonekera m'manyuzipepala otchuka komanso zoyankhulana ndi anthu otchuka osasinthasintha. Inde, aliyense wa ife kamodzi anamva nthano izi, ambiri anayesera kutsogoleredwa ndi iwo polimbana ndi zoipa zawo, koma sanathe kuchotsa chizolowezi cha kaduka. Tiyeni tione bwinobwino nthano zimenezi.
Bodza #1: Pali nsanje yoyipa yakuda komanso nsanje yopanda vuto.
Chilungamo: palibe nsanje yopanda vuto, chifukwa chodabwitsa ichi m'mawonekedwe ake onse ndi owononga komanso ovulaza. Anthu amene amati amachitira nsanje “oyera” akungoyesa kukhazika mtima pansi chikumbumtima chawo ndi kuchotsa liwongo. Polankhula motere, amadzitsimikizira okha kuti amachitira kaduka, koma mokoma mtima, kotero kuti kulakwa kwawo kulibe vuto. Koma muyenera kumvetsetsa kuti kukhumudwitsidwa komweko chifukwa cha kupambana kwa munthu wina kumawononga malingaliro ndi psyche ya munthu wansanje. Zilibe kanthu kuti ndi nsanje bwanji.
Nthano #2: Kaduka umakankhira kudzitukumula komanso kudzitukumula.
Chilungamo: chitukuko cha munthu, mosasamala kanthu kuti chikuwoneka chochepa bwanji, chimayendetsedwa ndi chikhumbo cha kukula ndi kukula monga munthu, ndipo chilimbikitso choyenera chimathandiza kuzindikira chikhumbo ichi. Komano, kaduka ndi chinthu chowononga kotheratu, choncho munthu wansanje akhoza mwamaganizo ndi mokweza kudana ndi kupambana kwa ena kwa maola ndi masiku, koma sadzachitapo kanthu kuti akwaniritse chilichonse. Ndipo chifukwa chake ndi chophweka: kuti akhale wopambana, munthu ayenera kutsogolera chuma chake chonse (kuphatikiza nzeru ndi maganizo) ku njira yomanga, ndipo munthu wansanje ali ndi mkwiyo ndi kukhumudwa, ndipo ubongo umakhala wotanganidwa. kuganiza za kupanda chilungamo kwa moyo ndikudzudzula munthu wina amene wapambana.
Bodza #4: Kuganizira za ubwino wanu ndikuzindikira kuti munthu wansanje ndi wabwino kuposa munthu wansanje ndiyo njira yabwino yothetsera kaduka.
Chilungamo: chizoloŵezi chodziyerekeza ndi anthu ena, kwenikweni, sichili bwino kuposa kaduka, ndipo ngakhale zambiri - ndizomwe mizu yachipongwechi imakula. Podziyerekezera ndi munthu wina ndikuyesera kudziŵa ubwino wake kuposa iye, munthu wansanje “amadyetsa” nsanje yake, chifukwa m’malo mouchotsa, amadekha mothandizidwa ndi ukulu wake. Chifukwa chake, m'malo mochotsa kaduka, munthu nthawi zonse amadzitsimikizira kuti ndi wokongola / wanzeru / wokoma mtima kuposa yemwe amasilira.
Bodza #5: Kuchepetsa chinthu chosilira ndi njira yosavuta komanso yothandiza yochotsera kukhumudwa komwe kumachitika chifukwa cha kupambana kwa anthu ena.
Chilungamo: akatswiri ambiri a zamaganizo amalangiza anthu ansanje kuganiza kuti kaduka ndi "chithunzi" chabe, "ziwonetsero zakunja za kupambana" zomwe munthu wansanje wataya chinthu chofunika kwambiri. Ndichikhulupiliro ichi kuti mizu yamalingaliro imakhala yofanana ndi zinthu monga "anthu okongola alibe nzeru zapamwamba", "mkazi yemwe ali ndi ntchito yabwino yolipira kwambiri sakusangalala ndi moyo wake", "olemera onse ndi anthu opanda khalidwe." ” ndipo pepani kwambiri. Koma njira iyi yothanirana ndi kaduka sizothandiza chabe, komanso yovulaza, chifukwa kudzera mwa iyo munthu amadzipangira yekha malingaliro olakwika. Mwa kufooketsa chilichonse chomwe chimayambitsa kaduka, munthu pamlingo wocheperako amadzilimbikitsa kuti chuma, kukongola, ntchito yabwino ndi zoyipa komanso zosafunikira. M'tsogolomu, zidzakhala zovuta kwambiri kuti munthu wansanje achite bwino, chifukwa malingaliro osadziwika bwino adzakana ntchito zonse zabwino chifukwa cha malingaliro oyambirira.
Mizu ya kaduka yagona pakuwunika ndi kachitidwe kaulamuliro komwe aliyense amagwiritsa ntchito kumlingo wina. Ngati munthu, akudziyerekezera ndi anthu ena, amadziyesa "otsika", amayamba kukwiya komanso nsanje, chifukwa mosadziwa (kapena mwachidziwitso) akufuna kukhala "wamkulu" kuchokera pamalingaliro a dongosolo lake laulamuliro. . Kuchotsa kaduka n'kotheka, koma chifukwa cha ichi munthu ayenera kusintha maganizo ake padziko lonse ndi maganizo pa maudindo chikhalidwe ndi utsogoleri wotsogola.
Njira yokhayo yochotsera nsanje ndikubwezeretsa kudzidalira kokwanira ndipo izi zitha kukwaniritsidwa ndi malingaliro awa:
1. Chepetsani kucheza ndi anthu amene amakonda kukudzudzulani ndi kukuchititsani kudziimba mlandu. Aliyense ali ndi mnzake osachepera mmodzi amene amakonda kuphunzitsa aliyense ndi kuuza ena chifukwa chake amakhala molakwika. Kuyanjana ndi anthu oterowo kungachititse munthu kudzikayikira, kudziimba mlandu kwa ena chifukwa cha moyo wanu “wolakwika,” ndipo chifukwa chake, kuchitira nsanje anthu ambiri “olondola”. Pali njira zambiri zothetsera kulakwa, kotero munthu aliyense angathe kuthetsa mwamsanga zotsatira za kuchita ndi manipulators ndi otsutsa ndi kubwezeretsa psyche.
2. Chotsani chikhulupiriro cha “dziko lolungama.” Zikhulupiriro zonse za “chilungamo cha dziko lapansi” n’zochokera m’chikhulupiriro chakuti anthu onse abwino ayenera kufupidwa ndi maulamuliro apamwamba, ndipo anthu oipa ayenera kulangidwa. Ndipo, ndithudi, amadziona kuti ndi "abwino". Ndipotu, sitinganene kuti dziko lapansi ndi lopanda chilungamo, koma palibe kugawanika kukhala "zabwino ndi zoipa" mmenemo, popeza palibe mphoto ya "zabwino". Choncho, muyenera kuchotsa chikhulupiriro mu "chilungamo chapamwamba" mwamsanga kuti musiye kuyembekezera mphatso zochokera kumwamba ndi kutenga moyo wanu m'manja mwanu.
3. Nthawi zonse funirani zabwino anthu ndipo muzisangalala ndi chipambano cha ena. Mukamva za kupambana kwa munthu wina, muyenera kuyesa kudziyika nokha m'malo mwake, ganizirani chisangalalo chake ndikumverera bwino. Zochita zosavutazi zidzakuthandizani kuti musamangokhalira kugonjetsa nsanje, komanso mukhale munthu wodzikonda, chifukwa amalimbikitsa chifundo ndi chifundo. Ndipo, ndithudi, tiyenera kukumbukira kuti njira yotereyi kwa munthu wachifundo idzathandiza kuchitira anthu onse mofanana, osati kuchitira nsanje aliyense.
4. Dziwani zolinga zanu zenizeni ndi zokhumba zanu. “Aliyense ali ndi chimwemwe chake,” akutero anthu anzeru, ndipo akatswiri a zamaganizo amavomerezana nawo. Ndipotu, ambiri aife sitifuna galimoto yapamwamba, chithunzi chapamwamba, kapena digiri yapamwamba. Ndiko kuzindikira chimene chimatchedwa “chimwemwe chaumwini” chimene chingathandize kuti asiye kusirira anthu amene achita bwino m’mbali zina. Chifukwa chake, njira yabwino yochotsera chizolowezi chodzifananiza ndi ena ndikusilira anthu opambana ndikumvetsetsa zomwe zimakusangalatsani komanso zomwe mukufuna kuchita.
5. Tengani mopepuka mfundo yakuti munthu aliyense ali ndi njira yakeyake ya moyo, ndipo kupambana ndi kulephera ndizo zotsatira za chosankha chake panjira. Palibe ziweruzo ziwiri zofanana, chifukwa aliyense wa ife tsiku lililonse amasankha chimodzi kapena china, chomwe m'tsogolomu chidzabweretsa zotsatira zina. Wina amasankha kudzipereka yekha ku banja lake, wina amawononga nthawi yambiri ya moyo wake, wina amaika pangozi ndikuyamba ntchito zatsopano, ndipo wina amakonda moyo wabata ndi ntchito yokhazikika. Chilichonse chimene chili m’moyo wa munthu ndi chotsatira cha zochita zake ndi zochita zake, ndipo nsanje ilibe tanthauzo, chifukwa palibe phindu limene limagwera anthu ochokera kumwamba. Choncho m’malo mosirira bwenzi lochita bwino kwambiri, ganizirani zimene muyenera kusankha kuti zinthu zikuyendereni bwino komanso kuti mukhale osangalala.