Kulera achinyamata si kophweka. Poyankha zonena zawo, amatembenuza maso, kumenyetsa chitseko, kapena kuchita mwano. Mtolankhani Bill Murphy anafotokoza kuti n’kofunika kukumbutsa ana zimene akuyembekezera ngakhale kuti amawachitira nkhanza.
Nkhaniyi idzachotsa makolo padziko lonse lapansi, koma mwana wanga wamkazi tsiku lina adzalolera "kundipha" chifukwa cha iye.
Mu 2015, Dokotala wa Economics Erica Rascon-Ramirez anapereka zotsatira za phunziroli pamsonkhano wa Royal Economic Society. Gulu la asayansi ochokera ku yunivesite ya Essex adatenga atsikana 15 aku Britain azaka zapakati pa 13-14 ndikuwunika moyo wawo kwazaka khumi.
Ofufuzawo anapeza kuti zimene makolo amayembekeza kwambiri kwa ana awo aakazi azaka zapakati pa XNUMX ndi XNUMX ndi chimodzi mwa zinthu zimene zimawathandiza kuti apambane m’tsogolo akadzakula. Atsikana omwe amayi awo amawakumbutsa mosalekeza za ziyembekezo zawo zazikulu sakanagwera mu misampha ya moyo yomwe ingawononge chipambano chawo chamtsogolo.
Makamaka, atsikana awa:
- zocheperako kutenga mimba paunyamata
- okonzeka kupita ku koleji
- sakhala ndi mwayi wokakamira ntchito zosadalirika, zolipira zochepa
- nthawi zambiri amakhala osagwira ntchito kwa nthawi yayitali
Inde, kupeŵa mavuto oyambirira ndi misampha sikutsimikizira tsogolo lopanda mavuto. Komabe, atsikana oterowo amakhala ndi mipata yambiri yopambana pambuyo pake. Ndi zimenezo, makolo okondedwa, ntchito yanu yatha. Ndiponso, chipambano cha ana chimadalira kwambiri pa zokhumba zawo ndi khama lawo osati pa mikhalidwe yanu.
Kutembenuza maso awo? Choncho zimagwira ntchito
Zowonadi - owerenga ena angayankhe. Kodi inuyo munayesapo kupeza zifukwa mwana wanu wamkazi wazaka 13? Anyamata ndi atsikana onse amayang'ana maso awo, akumenyetsa zitseko, ndikudzipatula.
Ine ndikutsimikiza sizosangalatsa kwambiri. Mwana wanga wamkazi ali ndi chaka chimodzi chokha, choncho sindinapezebe mwayi wodzisangalatsa ndekha. Koma makolo angatonthozedwe ndi lingaliro, lochirikizidwa ndi asayansi, lakuti pamene kuli kwakuti zikuoneka ngati mukulankhula ndi khoma, malangizo anu akugwiradi ntchito.
Ngakhale titayesetsa bwanji kupeŵa uphungu wa makolo, umakhudzabe zosankha zathu.
“Nthaŵi zambiri, timatha kuchita zimene tikufuna, ngakhale zitakhala zosemphana ndi chifuniro cha makolo,” analemba motero wolemba kafukufuku Dr. Rascon-Ramirez. Koma ngakhale titayesetsa bwanji kupeŵa uphungu wa makolo, umakhudzabe zosankha zathu.”
M’mawu ena, ngati mwana wamkazi wachichepere atembenuza maso ndi kunena kuti, “Amayi, mwatopa,” chimene kwenikweni amatanthauza ndicho, “Zikomo kaamba ka uphungu wothandiza. Ndiyesetsa kuchita bwino. ”
Zotsatira za kulera ana
Zoyembekeza zazikulu zosiyanasiyana zimalimbitsana. Ngati mukakamiza mwana wanuyo kuti azikhala ndi malingaliro awiri nthawi imodzi - ayenera kupita ku koleji ndipo sayenera kutenga mimba ali wachinyamata - amakhala ndi mwayi wosakhala mayi pofika zaka 20 kusiyana ndi mtsikana yemwe adaulutsidwa uthenga umodzi wokha: inu musatenge pakati mpaka mutakhwima mokwanira.
Mtolankhani Meredith Bland anathirira ndemanga pa ichi: “Zowonadi, kudzidalira koyenera ndi kuzindikira maluso a munthu kuli kodabwitsa. Koma ngati mwana wamkazi wadziteteza ku mimba yoyambirira chifukwa chakuti sakufuna kumvetsera kung’ung’udza kwathu, zili bwinonso. Zolinga zilibe kanthu. Chachikulu ndichakuti izi sizichitika. ”
Sindikudziwa za iwe, koma ngakhale ine, bambo wazaka makumi anayi, nthawi zina ndimamva mawu ochenjeza a makolo anga kapena agogo anga m'mutu mwanga ndikapita komwe sindiyenera kupita. Agogo anga aamuna anamwalira pafupifupi zaka makumi atatu zapitazo, koma nditadya kwambiri mchere, ndimamumva akung’ung’udza.
Poganiza kuti phunzirolo nloonanso kwa anyamata—palibe chifukwa chokhulupirira zimenezo—kuti ndapambana, makamaka mwa zina, ndiyenera kuthokoza makolo anga ndi zimene amayembekezera. Kotero amayi ndi abambo, zikomo chifukwa cha nitpicking. Ndipo mwana wanga wamkazi - ndikhulupirireni, zidzakhala zovuta kwa ine kuposa inu.
Za wolemba: Bill Murphy ndi mtolankhani. Lingaliro la wolembayo silingafanane ndi malingaliro a akonzi.