Tikukhala m'malo ampikisano: ngati mukufuna kukwaniritsa china chake, dzineneni nokha, onetsani kuti ndinu abwino kuposa ena. Kodi mukufuna kuganiziridwa? Imirirani ufulu wanu. Kudzichepetsa masiku ano sikulemekezedwa. Ena amaona kuti ndi chizindikiro cha kufooka. Psychoanalyst Gerald Schonewulf akutsimikiza kuti tinakankhira khalidwe ili m'mizere yakumbuyo mopanda chifukwa.
Afilosofi ndi olemba ndakatulo akale ankadziŵa bwino kufunika kwa kudzichepetsa. Socrates anapenda anzeru onse otchuka a m’nthaŵi yake ndipo anapeza kuti iye anali wanzeru koposa onse, chifukwa “amadziŵa kuti sadziwa kanthu.” Ponena za wanzeru wina wotchuka, Socrates anati: "Akuganiza kuti amadziwa zomwe sakudziwa, pomwe ine ndikumvetsa bwino umbuli wanga."
“Ndayenda kwambiri ndi kuwona zambiri, koma kufikira tsopano sindinakumanepo ndi munthu amene angadziweruze yekha,” anatero Confucius. "Koma chinthu chachikulu: khalani owona kwa inu nokha / Ndiye, usiku utatha, / simudzapereka ena," Shakespeare analemba ku Hamlet (yomasuliridwa ndi ML Lozinsky). Mawu awa akugogomezera momwe kulili kofunika ku thanzi lathu lamalingaliro kuti tithe kudziyesa tokha (ndipo izi sizingatheke popanda kudzichepetsa).
Izi zimathandizidwa ndi kafukufuku waposachedwapa wa Toni Antonucci ndi anzake atatu ku yunivesite ya Michigan. Ofufuza apeza kuti kudzichepetsa n’kofunika kwambiri kuti munthu akhale ndi ubale wabwino.
Kudzichepetsa kumathandizira kupeza kusagwirizana kofunikira kuti athetse mavuto omwe amabwera.
Phunzirolo linakhudza mabanja 284 a ku Detroit, anafunsidwa kuyankha mafunso monga akuti: “Kodi ndinu wodzichepetsa bwanji?”, “Kodi mnzanuyo ndi wodzichepetsa chotani?”, “Kodi mukuganiza kuti mungakhululukire mnzanu ngati akukhumudwitsani kapena kukukhumudwitsani. inu?" Mayankhowo anathandiza ochita kafukufukuwo kudziwa zambiri za ubale wa kudzichepetsa ndi kukhululuka.
“Tinapeza kuti anthu amene amaona kuti mnzawoyo ndi wodzichepetsa, amakhala okonzeka kumukhululukira ngati walakwa. Mosiyana ndi zimenezo, ngati mnzanuyo anali wodzikuza ndipo sanavomereze zolakwa zake, adakhululukidwa monyinyirika, "olemba phunzirolo alemba.
Tsoka ilo, kudzichepetsa sikulemekezedwa mokwanira m’chitaganya chamakono. Sitilankhula kawirikawiri za kudzidalira komanso kulolera maganizo a anthu ena. M'malo mwake, timabwereza mobwerezabwereza kufunika kodzidalira komanso kumenyera ufulu wanu.
Mu ntchito yanga ndi maanja, ndaona kuti nthawi zambiri chopinga chachikulu pa chithandizo ndi kusafuna kwa onse awiri kuvomereza kuti akulakwitsa. Munthu akakhala wodzikuza, m’pamenenso angadziŵe kuti iye yekha ndiye wolondola, ndipo ena onse ndi olakwa. Munthu wotero nthawi zambiri sali wokonzeka kukhululukira mnzake, chifukwa sangavomereze zolakwa zake ndipo chifukwa chake amangokhala osalekerera alendo.
Anthu odzikuza ndi odzitukumula nthawi zambiri amakhulupirira kuti chipembedzo chawo, zipani zawo zandale kapena mtundu wawo ndi wapamwamba kuposa ena onse. Kufuna kwawo kolimbikira kuti nthawi zonse ndi m'zonse zikhale zolondola kumadzetsa mikangano - pakati pa anthu komanso zikhalidwe. Komano, kudzichepetsa sikuyambitsa mikangano, koma, m’malo mwake, kumalimbikitsa mgwirizano ndi kuthandizana. Monga momwe kudzikuza kumayambitsa kudzikuza, momwemonso kudzichepetsa nthawi zambiri kumayambitsa kudzichepetsa, kumabweretsa kukambirana kolimbikitsa, kumvetsetsana ndi mtendere.
Mwachidule: kudzichepetsa kwathanzi (osati kusokonezedwa ndi kukhumudwa) kumakuthandizani kuti muzitha kudziyang'ana nokha komanso ena. Kuti tiwone bwino dziko lotizungulira komanso udindo wathu momwemo, ndikofunikira kuzindikira zenizeni zenizeni. Kudzichepetsa kumathandizira kupeza malingaliro oyenera kuthetsa mavuto omwe amabwera. Choncho, kudzichepetsa n’kofunika kwambiri kuti munthu athe kudzidalira.
Mbiri yakale imasonyeza kuti kudzikuza ndi kudzikuza kunalepheretsa zikhalidwe ndi anthu ambiri kusintha pamene kusintha kunali kofunika kuti apulumuke. Onse aŵiri Agiriki ndi Roma anayamba kutsika pamene anakhala onyada ndi odzitukumula, akumayiŵala kufunika kwa kudzichepetsa. “Kunyada kutsogolera chiwonongeko; kudzikuza kutsogolera kugwa,” limatero Baibulo. Kodi ife (anthu paokha ndi anthu onse) tingazindikirenso kufunika kwa kudzichepetsa?
Chitsime: blogs.psychcentral.com