Zamkatimu
Kukhala mosangalala nthawi zonse ndi munthu m’modzi sikophweka. Tiyenera kukhala pafupi ndi munthu amene amaona, kumva ndi kuchita mosiyana. Tili pansi pa chitsenderezo cha chilengedwe, zochitika za makolo ndi zofalitsa. Maubwenzi ndi gawo la anthu awiri, mutha kuswa mikhalidwe ndi miyambo ngati nonse mukufuna. Kuyambira tili ana, tinaphunzitsidwa kuti n’kulakwa kukonza zinthu, okwatirana ayenera kuchita zonse pamodzi ndi kuthandizana. Yakwana nthawi yoti musiye maganizo olakwika.
Anthu okwatirana amene akhala pamodzi kwa nthawi yaitali samangokhalira kupirira maganizo ndi zizoloŵezi za wina ndi mzake, komanso kuti agwirizane ndi chikhalidwe cha anthu. Mphunzitsi Katerina Kostoula amakhulupirira kuti munthu sayenera kutsatira malamulo mwachimbulimbuli.
1. Kukangana ndikwabwino
Maubwenzi omwe mulibe malo a mikangano siwolimba komanso owona mtima. Ngati musunga malingaliro anu, mulibe mwayi wosintha chilichonse. Kumenyana kumachiritsa: kumakuthandizani kutulutsa mkwiyo wanu ndikulankhula zomwe simukuzikonda. M'kati mwa mikangano, mumaphunzira za ululu wa wina ndi mzake, izi zimakuthandizani kumvetsetsa bwino mnzanuyo, ndipo pamapeto pake zimakhala zosavuta kwa aliyense. Mwa kupondereza mkwiyo, mumamanga khoma pakati pa inu ndi mnzanu ndikuchepetsa chitetezo chanu cha mthupi.
Muyenera kukangana, koma yesani kuchita mwachitukuko. Kukambitsirana kotentha komwe kumabweretsa mapangano abwino kumakhala kothandiza, sikuli koyenera kukhumudwitsana.
2. Nthawi zina muyenera kuchita zomwe mumakonda.
Kodi mukufuna kupitiriza kuchita chizolowezi chosasangalatsa kwa mnzanuyo? Kodi mukufuna kucheza ndi anzanu, kukonda kukhala nokha kwa maola angapo? Izi nzabwino. Kudzikonda kudzakuthandizani kukonda wokondedwa wanu kwambiri.
Zokonda zanu, kudziyimira pawokha komanso kupatukana kwa wina ndi mnzake kwakanthawi zimathandizira kusunga chikondi chamoto. Kutsimikizika ndi kuyanjana kosalekeza kumawononga chilakolako. Iwo ali ofunikira kokha kumayambiriro kwa chiyanjano.
Kutalikirana kumathandizira kukopa chidwi chifukwa nthawi zambiri anthu amafuna zomwe alibe.
Katswiri wa zamaganizo Esther Perel, mmodzi mwa akatswiri odziwika bwino pa ubale, adafunsa anthu akapeza wokondedwa wawo wokongola. Nthawi zambiri, iye analandira mayankho otsatirawa: pamene iye kulibe, pa phwando, pamene iye ali wotanganidwa ndi bizinesi.
Kutalikirana kwanu kumathandizira kukopeka chifukwa nthawi zambiri anthu amafuna zomwe alibe pakadali pano. Tiyenera kuteteza ufulu wathu waumwini ngati tikufuna kukhalabe okongola kwa mnzako, ngakhale sakufuna kukusiyani.
Palinso chifukwa china chomwe muyenera kupitiriza kugwira ntchito yanu: kudzipereka nokha, mumapeza kusakhutira ndi kukwiya komanso kumva chisoni.
3. Palibe chifukwa chokhalira kuthandizana
Wokondedwa amabwera kunyumba kuchokera kuntchito ndikudandaula za tsiku lovuta. Mukufuna kuthandiza, kupereka malangizo, kuyesa kukonza zinthu. Ndi bwino kuyesa kumvetsera, kuyesa kumvetsetsa, kufunsa mafunso. Wokondedwayo ndi munthu wodziwa zambiri, adzatha kuthetsa mavuto ake. Chomwe amafunikira ndikutha kumvetsera ndi kumvetsetsa.
Ngati mukufuna kumanga ubale wofanana, pewani udindo wa wothandizira, makamaka pankhani ya ntchito za akatswiri a mnzanuyo. Muyenera kumuthandiza mnzanuyo pazochitika zake akakufunsani.
M'madera ena, chithandizo chanu nthawi zonse chimakhala chofunikira komanso chofunikira: ntchito zapakhomo ndi kulera ana. Tsukani mbale, yendani galuyo ndikuchita homuweki ndi mwana wanu nthawi zonse.