Anthu opambana amadziwa mphamvu ya mawu osalankhula chifukwa amawerengedwa m'thupi mwathu. Chinsinsi chake ndi kupewa manja osaonekera koma olankhula pamene mukucheza ndi munthu wina kuntchito kapena panthawi iliyonse yomwe ili yofunika kwa inu. Zotsatira za zomwe Travis Bradbury adawona.
Chilankhulo cha thupi chimalankhula kwa ife tisanakhale ndi nthawi yokonza mawu athu. Ndipo ndizovuta kwambiri kuzilamulira kuposa zolankhula zathu - ndichifukwa chake amazikhulupirira kuposa zomwe amamva? Mwachitsanzo, mumanyong'onyeka pang'ono kapena mwaphwanyidwa pamsonkhano… Nthawi zina zimakhala choncho.
Ndipo nthawi zina mayendedwe athu amawonedwa ndi ena mwanjira yosiyana kwambiri ndi momwe tingaganizire.
Yang'anani anthu ochita bwino omwe amalankhulana ndi chidaliro chawo ndikuwongolera zomwe zikuchitika pamalankhulidwe ndi thupi. Samalani kwambiri zomwe simuyenera kuchita…
Zikuwoneka kwa inu kuti palibe amene angazindikire kuyang'ana kwanu pa koloko. Koma izi zimawonekera nthawi zonse ndipo zimatanthauzidwa ngati kusalemekeza komanso kusaleza mtima.
1. Khalani pansi. Simudzauza abwana anu kuti, "Sindikuwona chifukwa chake ndiyenera kukumverani," koma ngati mutasintha malo a thupi lanu ndikukhala pansi, thupi lanu lidzakuuzani, komanso momveka bwino. Ichi ndi chizindikiro cha kusalemekeza. Mukakhala odekha komanso osasunga kaimidwe kanu, zikuwonetsa kuti simukufuna ndipo simukufuna kukhala pano.
Ubongo wathu umagwiritsidwa ntchito powerenga chidziwitso mwa kaimidwe komanso kuchuluka kwa malo omwe munthu waima pafupi ndi ife amakhala.
Mphamvu yamagetsi - mukayimirira mowongoka ndi mapewa anu kumbuyo, ndikuwongolera mutu wanu. Pamene, mwa slouching, mumafooketsa mawonekedwe anu, yesetsani kutenga malo ochepa ndipo motero mumasonyeza kuti muli ndi mphamvu zochepa. Chifukwa chake, pali chifukwa chabwino kwambiri chokhalira ndi kaimidwe muzokambirana zonse: umu ndi momwe timakhaliranso chidwi ndi olankhula nawo, kusonyeza ulemu ndi chidwi mwa iye.
2. Gesticulate mokokomeza. Nthawi zambiri, anthu akafuna kubisa chinachake kapena kusokoneza chidwi, amawombera kwambiri. Dziyang'anire nokha pamene simukufuna kupereka yankho lachindunji - mudzawonanso mayendedwe a thupi omwe siachilendo kwa inu.
Yesetsani kusunga manja aang'ono ndi olondola, izi zimasonyeza kuti ndinu olamulira pazochitika ndi zolankhula zanu. Manja oterowo ndi ofanana ndi anthu ambiri ochita bwino omwe amadzidalira komanso amangoyang'ana bizinesi. Komanso manja ayenera kukhala otseguka.
3. Yang'anani pa wotchi yanu. Osachita izi polankhula ndi munthu, zimamveka ngati kusalemekeza komanso kusaleza mtima. Kachitidwe kowoneka ngati kowoneka bwino kameneka kamawonekera nthawi zonse. Ndipo ngakhale mutangozolowera kulamulira nthawi ndipo mukufunadi kumvetsera wolankhulayo, ndi manja awa mudzamupatsa kuganiza kuti mudatopa pakukambirana.
4. Patukani kwa aliyense. Izi sizikutanthauza kuti simukukhudzidwa ndi zomwe zikuchitika. Zimawerengedwabe pamlingo wocheperako ngati chizindikiro cha kusakhulupirira wolankhula. Zomwezo zimachitikanso mukapanda kutembenukira kwa interlocutor wanu panthawi yokambirana kapena kuyang'ana kumbali.
Yesetsani kulamulira osati manja okha, komanso mayendedwe a thupi, kuti musatumize zizindikiro zowoneka bwino pamsonkhano wa ntchito kapena zokambirana zofunika.
Tikudziwa kuti tikhoza kumvetsera mosamalitsa popanda kuyang'ana pa interlocutor, koma mnzathu angaganize mosiyana
5. Dulani mikono ndi miyendo yanu. Ngakhale mutamwetulira nthawi imodzi ndi kukambirana mosangalatsa, munthuyo amaonabe kuti mukumukankhira kutali. Ichi ndi chilankhulo cha thupi chomwe ambiri adalembapo. Umu ndi momwe mumapangira chotchinga chakuthupi pakati pa inu ndi wokamba nkhani chifukwa simumasuka ku zomwe akunena.
Kuyimirira ndi manja anu mutadutsana ndi bwino, koma muyenera kulimbana ndi chizolowezi ichi ngati simukufuna kuwonedwa ngati (mopanda chilungamo!) Mtundu wachinsinsi.
6. Muzitsutsana ndi mawu anu ndi nkhope kapena manja. Mwachitsanzo, kumwetulira mokakamiza panthawi yokambirana pamene mukukana. Mwina umu ndi mmene mungafunire kuchepetsa kukana kwanuko, koma ndi bwino kwambiri ngati mawu a pankhope yanu akugwirizana ndi mmene mukumvera. Wothandizira wanu amangoganizira za izi kuti pali chinachake cholakwika apa, chinachake sichikugwirizana ndipo, mwinamwake, mukubisa chinachake kwa iye kapena mukufuna kunyenga.
7. Gwirani mutu mwamphamvu. Anthu ambiri amalangiza kugwedeza mutu nthawi ndi nthawi kuti apitirize kulumikizana. Komabe, ngati mugwedeza mutu pambuyo pa mawu ake aliwonse, zingawonekere kwa wokambirana naye kuti mukugwirizana ndi chinachake chimene simukuchimvetsa, ndipo nthawi zambiri mumalakalaka chivomerezo chake.
8. Konzani tsitsi lanu. Ichi ndi chizindikiro cha mantha, chosonyeza kuti mumangoganizira za maonekedwe anu kusiyana ndi zomwe zikuchitika. Zomwe, kawirikawiri, sizili kutali ndi choonadi.
9. Pewani kuyang'ana maso. Ngakhale kuti tonsefe timamvetsetsa kuti n'zotheka kukhala nawo mokwanira pa zomwe zikuchitika ndikumvetsera mosamala kwambiri, osayang'ana mmwamba, zizindikiro za thupi ndi momwe ubongo umawerengera, mikangano yamaganizo imapambana apa. Izi zidzawoneka ngati chinsinsi, zomwe mumasunga, ndipo zidzadzutsa kukayikira poyankha.
Ndikofunikira kwambiri kuyang'anana maso panthawi yomwe mukulankhula zofunikira kapena mukamalankhulana zovuta. Amene ali ndi chizolowezi ichi ayenera kudzikumbutsa kuti asayang'ane pansi, kuzungulira, chifukwa izi zidzakhala ndi zotsatira zoipa.
10. Kuyang'ana maso kwambiri. Mosiyana ndi m'mbuyomo, kuyang'ana kwambiri m'maso kumawonedwa ngati nkhanza ndi kuyesa kulamulira. Pa avareji, anthu aku America amangoyang'ana maso kwa masekondi 7, nthawi yayitali pomvetsera, kuchepera polankhula.
M'pofunikanso kuti muyang'ane kumbali. Ngati mutsitsa maso anu pansi, izi zimawonedwa ngati kugonjera, kumbali - chidaliro ndi chidaliro.
11. Perekani maso anu. Ena ali ndi chizoloŵezi chimenechi, komanso amangoyang’anana mwaluso ndi mmodzi wa anzawo. Mwamwayi kwa ife, zizolowezi zachidziwitsozi ndizosavuta kuziletsa komanso ndizofunika.
Kugwirana chanza mwamphamvu kwambiri kumasonyeza kufuna kulamulira, kufooka kwambiri - za kusatetezeka
12. Atakhala momvetsa chisoni. Ndizovuta kwambiri pano - sitingathe kuwongolera komanso kulingalira momwe timawonekera kunja. Vuto ndiloti ngati timizidwa m'malingaliro athu omvetsa chisoni popanda cholakwa cha omwe ali pafupi nafe, adzawonabe kuti mwakhumudwa chifukwa cha iwo.
Njira yopulumukira ndikukumbukira izi mutazunguliridwa ndi anthu. Taganizirani mfundo yakuti ngati mupita kwa mnzanu ndi funso linalake la ntchito ndipo nthawi yomweyo nkhope yanu ikuwoneka yachisoni komanso yotanganidwa, zomwe angachite poyamba sizikhala ndi mawu anu, koma pa nkhope yanu: sunasangalale ndi izi kamodzi?" Kumwetulira kophweka, ngakhale kumveka kochititsa manyazi bwanji, ubongo umawerengedwa bwino ndikusiya malingaliro abwino kwa inu.
13. Yandikirani kwambiri kwa interlocutor. Ngati muyimirira pafupi ndi mapazi ndi theka, izi zimawoneka ngati kuwukira kwa malo anu ndipo zikuwonetsa kusalemekeza. Ndipo nthawi ina, munthu ameneyu adzakhala wosamasuka pamaso panu.
14. Finyani manja anu. Ichi ndi chizindikiro chakuti ndinu wamanjenje kapena odzitchinjiriza kapena mukufuna kukangana. Kulankhulana nanu, anthu omwe akuyankha nawonso amakhala ndi mantha.
15. Kugwirana chanza kofooka. Kugwirana chanza mwamphamvu kwambiri kumasonyeza kufuna kulamulira, kufooka kwambiri - kusadzidalira. Onse si abwino kwambiri. Kugwirana chanza kwanu kuzikhala chiyani? Nthawi zonse zimasiyana malinga ndi munthuyo ndi momwe zinthu zilili, koma nthawi zonse zimakhala zolimba komanso zotentha.
Za Katswiri: Travis Bradbury ndi wolemba nawo Emotional Intelligence 2.0, yomwe yamasuliridwa m'zilankhulo za 23; woyambitsa nawo wa TalentSmart consulting Center, omwe makasitomala ake amaphatikiza magawo atatu mwa magawo atatu amakampani a Fortune 500.