N’chifukwa chiyani atsikana amakopeka kwambiri ndi amuna a ndevu? Ndi njira zozama ziti zomwe zimaphatikizidwa mwa amayi akaona zomera pankhope ya okondedwa awo? Mfundo zochepa zokakamiza poteteza ndevu.
Kodi ndevu zabwerera m'fashoni kapena sizinachoke mufashoni? Kuchokera pamalingaliro a chisinthiko - chachiwiri. Pampikisano wofuna chidwi cha akazi, amuna a ndevu amayamba ndikupambana.
Nyenyezi zambiri, kuyambira ochita zisudzo mpaka mafano a rock, amavala ndevu. Ndevu zili ponseponse, koma anthu ena samazikondabe. Posadziwa chilichonse chokhudza munthu, amathamangira kutsimikizira za iye, alibe nthawi kapena safuna kuzindikira umunthu womwe uli kumbuyo kwa zomera.
“Komabe, aliyense amene ali wofunitsitsa kuvomereza mfundo zachiphamaso zoterozo ndi kulumphira ku chiweruzo monga chilungamo ayenera kudziŵa kuti ali m’manja mwa malingaliro amalingaliro,” akukumbutsa motero Wendy Patrick, wolemba buku lakuti How to Read People.
Zinsinsi za kukopa amuna
Kukula kapena kusakula? Chisankho chomwe amuna ambiri amakumana nacho nthawi ndi nthawi. Pochita izi, ndikofunika kuti aganizire za chikhalidwe chawo, zizoloŵezi, makhalidwe a moyo, malo ogwira ntchito, maganizo a mkazi ndi zina.
Ndevu imasintha kwambiri maonekedwe a mwamuna, ndipo izi zimagwiritsidwa ntchito nthawi zambiri, mwachitsanzo, m'makampani opanga mafilimu, kusintha maonekedwe a zisudzo ndi izo. Kwa ambiri, chithumwa chake chimakhala chakuti ngati watopa kapena sapita, mukhoza kumuchotsa m'mphindi zochepa. Koma si zokhazo: kafukufuku waposachedwapa watsimikizira kuti amayi amapeza amuna omwe ali ndi tsitsi lakumaso okongola komanso olamulira pamagulu ndi thupi.
Amuna a ndevu omwe anali ndi maonekedwe aamuna ankaonedwa kuti ndi okongola kwambiri kwa otenga nawo mbali.
Phunziro la University of Queensland linaphatikizapo amayi a 919 a zaka zapakati pa 18 ndi 70. Anawonetsedwa zithunzi za amuna omwe ali ndi mitundu yosiyanasiyana ya tsitsi la nkhope ndipo adafunsidwa kuti ayese aliyense. Ophunzirawo adawona zithunzi 30 za amuna: aliyense adajambulidwa koyamba wopanda ndevu, kenako ndi ndevu zazikulu; nkhanizo zinawonetsedwanso matembenuzidwe ojambulidwa a zithunzi momwe nkhope zimawoneka zachimuna. Azimayi adawavotera chifukwa chokopeka ndi maubwenzi akanthawi kochepa komanso anthawi yayitali.
Kodi zotsatira zake zinali zotani? Kuchuluka kwa tsitsi kumaso, amuna okongola kwambiri, akatswiri a zamaganizo afika pamaganizo awa. Amuna a ndevu omwe ali ndi maonekedwe aamuna amaonedwa kuti ndi okongola kwambiri, makamaka pa maubwenzi a nthawi yaitali.
Ndevu ndi cheeky
Ofufuzawo anafika ponena kuti timaona nkhope yachimuna kwambiri ngati chizindikiro chakuti munthu ali ndi udindo waukulu pakati pa anthu ndipo ali ndi mphamvu zakuthupi. Tsitsi lakumaso limagogomezera mawonekedwe aamuna pobisa malo osawoneka bwino.
Olemba pulojekitiyi adatsimikizira kugwirizana pakati pa maonekedwe a nkhope yamphongo ndi mphamvu zakuthupi, luso lomenyana ndi malo apamwamba. Malingaliro awo, poyang'ana nkhope ya mwamuna, akazi amalingalira za mphamvu ndi thanzi la mwamuna, zomwe zingakhudze zomwe amakonda m'banja.
Zikuoneka kuti pokulitsa ndevu, mwamuna akhoza kulimbikitsa umuna wake? Zikuwoneka choncho. Kafukufuku akuwonetsa kuti amuna a ndevu nawonso amadzimva kuti ndiamuna kwambiri ndipo amatulutsa seramu ya testosterone, yomwe imawonjezera kulamulira kwa anthu.
Sikuti akazi onse amakonda ndevu
Panthawi imodzimodziyo, si amayi onse mu polojekitiyi omwe ankakonda nkhope ndi zomera: makamaka, ena amawopa kukhalapo kwa tizilombo toyambitsa matenda pamutu kapena pakhungu la amuna. Ena amaona nkhope zosameta ngati chizindikiro chakuti mwamuna satsatira maonekedwe ake.
Komabe, ubalewu sugwira ntchito mosiyana - amayi omwe ali ndi vuto lalikulu lodana ndi tizilombo toyambitsa matenda amatha kukonda amuna a ndevu, zomwe zingasonyeze kuti amawona tsitsi la nkhope ngati chizindikiro cha thanzi labwino.
Azimayi osakwatiwa omwe ali ndi zilakolako zobereka ankakonda kwambiri amuna ometedwa bwino.
Olemba pulojekitiyi adapezanso kuti amayi omwe ali ndi "zilakolako zazikulu zobereka" sankakonda amuna a ndevu. Komabe, asayansi ataganizira zaukwati wa omwe adagwira nawo ntchitoyi, zidapezeka kuti, ambiri, azimayi osakwatiwa komanso okwatiwa omwe amafuna kubereka adapeza kuti azimayi a ndevu amakhala okongola kwambiri kuposa amayi omwe sanalote za umayi.
Azimayi osakwatiwa omwe ali ndi zilakolako zoberekera ankakonda kwambiri amuna ometedwa bwino, pamene akazi okwatiwa ankasonyeza kuti amadana nawo.
Zoonadi, malingaliro a maonekedwe a amuna kapena akazi okhaokha ndi nkhani ya kukoma, yomwe imapangidwa chifukwa cha zinthu zambiri. Koma zikuwoneka kuti asayansi atsimikiziranso kuti timatsogoleredwa kwambiri ndi chilengedwe ndi njira zomwe zinayikidwa mazana, ngati si zikwi za mibadwo yapitayo. Ndipo tsopano, poyang'ana, mwachitsanzo, mafilimu omwe ali ndi Sean Connery, munthu amatha kumvetsa chifukwa chake Bond yometedwa bwino ikuwoneka ngati yocheperapo kusiyana ndi anthu omwe adasewera zaka zambiri pambuyo pake ndi ndevu zolemekezeka komanso zokongoletsedwa bwino.
Za Wolemba: Wendy Patrick ndi loya woweruza, wasayansi wazamalamulo, komanso wolemba buku la How to Read People.