Chikondi ndi chochitika chachinsinsi m'moyo wa munthu aliyense. Iye ndi chiwonetsero champhamvu cha malingaliro athu, chiwonetsero chakuya cha moyo ndi mankhwala opangidwa mu ubongo (kwa iwo omwe amakonda zomaliza). Chikondi chopanda malire chimasamala za chisangalalo cha munthu wina popanda kuyembekezera kubweza kalikonse. Zikumveka bwino, koma mumamva bwanji?
Mwina aliyense wa ife amafuna kukondedwa osati chifukwa cha zimene (a) amachita, zimene wafika, udindo umene ali nawo m’gulu la anthu, zimene amagwira ntchito, ndi zina zotero. Kupatula apo, kutsata "zofunikira" zonsezi, timasewera chikondi, m'malo mozimva zenizeni. Pakali pano, chodabwitsa chokongola ngati “chikondi chopanda mikhalidwe” chingatipatse ife kuvomereza kwa wina m’mikhalidwe yake yovuta ya moyo, zolakwa zopangidwa, zosankha zolakwika ndi zovuta zonse zimene moyo umatibweretsera mosapeŵeka. Amatha kupereka kuvomereza, kuchiritsa mabala ndi kupereka mphamvu kuti apite patsogolo.
Ndiye, tingachite chiyani kuti tiphunzire kukonda ena athu mopanda malire, kapena kuyandikira pafupi ndi chodabwitsa chotere?
1. Chikondi chopanda malire sikumverera kwenikweni koma ndi khalidwe. Tangolingalirani mkhalidwe umene ife tiri omasuka kotheratu ndi chisangalalo chonse ndi mantha, kupereka ena zabwino zonse zomwe ziri mwa ife. Tangoganizani chikondi monga khalidwe mwa iwo wokha, lomwe limadzaza mwini wake ndi ntchito yopatsa, kupereka. Chimakhala chozizwitsa cha chikondi cholemekezeka ndi chowolowa manja.
2. Dzifunseni nokha. Kukonzekera koteroko kwa funsoli sikungaganizidwe popanda kuzindikira, popanda zomwe, chikondi chopanda malire sichingatheke.
3. Lisa Poole (): “Pali zinthu zina m’moyo wanga zimene sindine “womasuka” kuvomereza. Makhalidwe anga ndi zochita zanga, ngakhale sizisokoneza aliyense, sizikugwirizana ndi zofuna zanga. Ndipo mukudziwa zomwe ndinazindikira: kukonda munthu mopanda malire sizitanthauza kuti kudzakhala kosavuta komanso kosavuta. Mwachitsanzo, wokondedwa wanu ali mu chinyengo kapena chisokonezo pazochitika zina, kuyesera kuzipewa kuti achoke ku zovuta za moyo. Kufuna kumutchinjiriza ku malingaliro ndi malingaliro awa sikuwonetsa chikondi chopanda malire. Chikondi chimatanthauza kuona mtima ndi kuona mtima, kulankhula zoona ndi mtima wokoma mtima, wodekha, wopanda chiweruzo.”
4. Chikondi chenicheni chimayamba ndi ... iwe mwini. Mumadziwa zolakwa zanu kuposa wina aliyense komanso kuposa wina aliyense. Kukhoza kudzikonda nokha pamene mukuzindikira kupanda ungwiro kwanu kumakupangitsani kusonyeza chikondi chofananacho kwa wina. Mpaka mutadziona kuti ndinu woyenera kukondedwa mopanda malire, kodi mungakonde bwanji munthu wina?