Zamkatimu
Sikuti nthawi zonse moyo uli wokonzeka kutipatsa zomwe timayembekezera. Komabe, kwa ena n’kovuta kuvomereza zimenezi. Katswiri wa zamaganizo Clifford Lazarus anakamba za ziyembekezo zitatu zimene zimatipangitsa kukhala osasangalala.
Bonnie ankayembekezera kuti moyo wake udzakhala wosalira zambiri. Anabadwira m'banja lolemera, anaphunzira pasukulu yaing'ono yachinsinsi. Sanakumane ndi mavuto aakulu, ndipo sanafunikire kudzisamalira. Pamene adalowa ku koleji ndikusiya dziko lake lotetezeka komanso lodziwikiratu, adasokonezeka. Anayenera kukhala yekha, kudziimira payekha, koma analibe luso lodzisamalira, kapena kufuna kuthana ndi mavuto.
Zoyembekeza za moyo zimagwirizana ndi ziganizo zitatu: "Chilichonse chiyenera kukhala chabwino ndi ine", "Anthu ondizungulira ayenera kundichitira zabwino", "Sindidzayenera kuthana ndi mavuto." Anthu ambiri amakhulupirira zimenezi. Ena amakhulupirira kuti sangatsekerezedwe m’misewu, kudikirira nthawi yokwanira, kuyang’anizana ndi akuluakulu a boma, ndi kunyozedwa.
Njira yabwino yothetsera ziyembekezo zapoizonizi ndikusiya zikhulupiriro zopanda pake ndi zofuna zanu, ena, ndi dziko lonse lapansi. Monga momwe Dr. Albert Ellis ananenera, “Inenso, kaŵirikaŵiri ndimalingalira mmene zikanakhalira zodabwitsa ngati ndikanakhala ndi khalidwe labwino, amene ali pafupi nane amandichitira chilungamo, ndipo dziko liri losavuta ndi lokondweretsa. Koma izi sizingatheke. ”
Anthu ena amaganiza kuti ayenera kupeza zomwe akufuna mwachangu komanso mosavutikira.
Ellis, yemwe anayambitsa chithandizo chamankhwala oganiza bwino m’maganizo, analankhula za ziyembekezo zitatu zopanda nzeru zimene zimayambitsa matenda ambiri a ubongo.
1. "Chilichonse chikhale chabwino ndi ine"
Chikhulupiriro chimenechi chimasonyeza kuti munthu amayembekezera zambiri kwa iye mwini. Amakhulupirira kuti ayenera kugwirizana ndi zomwe zili zoyenera. Iye akudziuza yekha kuti: “Ndiyenera kukhala wopambana, kufika pamwamba kwambiri. Ndikapanda kukwaniritsa zolinga zanga ndi kusachita zimene ndikuyembekezera, ndilepheradi.” Kuganiza koteroko kumayambitsa kudzidetsa, kudzikana, ndi kudzida.
2. “Anthu azindichitira zabwino”
Chikhulupiriro choterocho chimasonyeza kuti munthu samaona anthu ena moyenerera. Iye amawasankhira chimene iwo ayenera kukhala. Kuganiza motere, tikukhala m’dziko limene tinadzipanga tokha. Ndipo m’menemo aliyense ndi woona mtima, wachilungamo, woletsa ndi waulemu.
Ngati ziyembekezo zikuphwanyidwa ndi zenizeni, ndipo wina wadyera kapena woipa akuwonekera pafupi, timakwiyitsidwa kwambiri kotero kuti timayamba kudana ndi wowononga chinyengo, kukumana ndi mkwiyo komanso kumukwiyira. Maganizo amenewa ndi amphamvu kwambiri moti sakulolani kuganiza za chinthu cholimbikitsa komanso cholimbikitsa.
3. "Sindiyenera kuthana ndi mavuto ndi zovuta"
Anthu amene amaganiza choncho ali otsimikiza kuti dziko ndi lozungulira iwo. Chifukwa chake, zozungulira, zochitika, zochitika ndi zinthu zilibe ufulu wozikhumudwitsa ndi kuzikhumudwitsa. Ena amakhulupirira kuti Mulungu, kapena munthu wina amene amakhulupirira, ayenera kuwapatsa chilichonse chimene akufuna. Amakhulupirira kuti ayenera kupeza zomwe akufuna mwachangu komanso mosavutikira. Anthu oterowo amakhumudwa mosavuta, amaona kuti mavuto ndi tsoka la padziko lonse.
Zikhulupiriro zonsezi ndi ziyembekezo ziri kutali ndi zenizeni. Ngakhale kuti kuwachotsa sikophweka, zotsatira zake zimatsimikizira nthawi ndi khama.
Kodi tingasiye bwanji kukhala ndi malingaliro omwe ife tokha, omwe amatizungulira, mikhalidwe ndi mphamvu zapamwamba tiyenera kuchita mwanjira inayake? Pang'ono ndi pang'ono, m'malo mwa mawu akuti "ndiyenera" ndi "ndiyenera" ndi "Ndikufuna" ndi "Ndingakonde." Yesani ndipo osayiwala kugawana zotsatira.
Za Katswiri: Clifford Lazaro ndi director of the Lazarus Institute.