“Chimwemwe chingapezeke ngakhale m’nthaŵi zamdima kwambiri, ngati simuiŵala kutembenukira kuunika,” anatero munthu wanzeru wa m’buku lina lotchuka. Koma kusakhutira kukhoza kutipeza nthawi yabwino, komanso mu "zabwino" maubwenzi. Ndipo chikhumbo chathu chokha chimene chingatithandize kukhala osangalala, anatero Lori Lowe, wofufuza komanso wolemba mabuku ofotokoza za ukwati ndi maubwenzi.
Kulephera kwa anthu kukhala ndi chikhutiro m’miyoyo yawo ndicho chopinga chachikulu cha kukhala wachimwemwe. Chikhalidwe chathu chimatipangitsa kukhala osakhutira. Nthawi zonse timasowa china. Tikapeza zomwe tikufuna: kupindula, chinthu, kapena ubale wabwino, timakhala okondwa kwakanthawi, ndiyeno timamvanso njala yamkati iyi.
Laurie Lowe, yemwe ndi wochita kafukufuku komanso mlembi wa mabuku onena za ukwati ndi maunansi, anati: “Sitikhala okhutira ndi zimene tili nazo. - Komanso bwenzi, ndalama, nyumba, ana, ntchito ndi thupi lako. Sitikhala okhutira kotheratu ndi moyo wathu wonse.”
Koma zimenezi sizikutanthauza kuti sitingaphunzire kukhala osangalala. Choyamba, tiyenera kusiya kuimba mlandu dziko lotizungulira chifukwa silitipatsa chilichonse chimene tikufunikira kapena chimene tikufuna.
Njira yathu yopita ku chisangalalo imayamba ndi ntchito pamalingaliro
Dennis Praner, mlembi wa buku lakuti Happiness Is a Serious Issue, analemba kuti, “Kwenikweni, tidzayenera kuuza chibadwa chathu kuti ngakhale kuti timachimva ndi kuchilemekeza, sichidzakhala kutero, koma maganizo ndi amene angasankhe ngati takhutira.”
Munthu amatha kupanga chisankho chotero - kukhala wosangalala. Chitsanzo cha zimenezi ndi anthu amene akukhala muumphaŵi ndipo, kuwonjezera apo, amakhala osangalala kwambiri kuposa anthu olemera kwambiri a m’nthawi yawo.
Pokhala osakhutira, tikhoza kupanga chisankho kuti tikhale osangalala, Laurie Low akukhulupirira. Ngakhale m’dziko limene muli zoipa, tingakhalebe osangalala.
Pali zinthu zabwino zimene sitingathe kukhutitsidwa ndi moyo. Zimatilimbikitsa kusintha, kukonza, kuyesetsa, kupanga, kukwaniritsa. Pakadapanda kumverera kosakhutira, anthu sakadapanga zotulukira ndi zopanga zodzipangira okha komanso dziko lapansi. Ichi ndi chinthu chofunika kwambiri pa chitukuko cha anthu onse.
Prager akugogomezera kusiyana pakati pa zofunika - zabwino - kusakhutira ndi zosafunikira.
Tidzakhala osasangalala nthawi zonse ndi chinachake, koma izi sizikutanthauza kuti sitingakhale osangalala.
Kukwiyira kofunikira ndi ntchito yake kumapangitsa anthu kulenga kusintha. Gawo la mkango la kusakhutira kwabwino kumatikakamiza kupanga masinthidwe ofunika m'moyo.
Tikadakhala okhutira ndi ubale wowononga, sitingakhale ndi chilimbikitso chofunafuna bwenzi loyenera. Kusakhutira ndi kuchuluka kwa maubwenzi apamtima kumalimbikitsa okwatirana kufunafuna njira zatsopano zopititsira patsogolo kulankhulana.
Kukwiyira kosafunika kugwirizana ndi zinthu zomwe mwina sizofunika kwenikweni (monga manic kufufuza nsapato "zangwiro") kapena zimene sitingathe kuzilamulira (monga kuyesera kusintha makolo athu).
“Kusakhutira kwathu nthaŵi zina kumakhala kodziŵika bwino, koma ngati choyambitsa chake sichikhoza kuthetsedwa, chimangowonjezera kupanda chimwemwe,” akutero Prager. "Ntchito yathu ndikuvomereza zomwe sitingasinthe."
Nthawi zonse timakhala osakhutira ndi chinachake, koma izi sizikutanthauza kuti sitingakhale osangalala. Chimwemwe chimangogwira ntchito pamalingaliro anu.
Pamene sitikonda chinachake mwa mwamuna kapena mkazi, izi ndi zachilendo. Ndipo zimenezi sizikutanthauza kuti iye ndi wosayenera kwa ife. Mwina, akulemba Laurie Lowe, timangofunika kuganizira kuti ngakhale munthu wangwiro sakanatha kukwaniritsa zokhumba zathu zonse. Wokondedwa sangatipangitse kukhala osangalala. Ichi ndi chosankha chimene tiyenera kupanga tokha.
Za Katswiri: Lori Lowe ndi wofufuza komanso wolemba mabuku okhudza maukwati ndi maubwenzi.