Khalidwe lathu ngati achikulire limakhudzidwa kwambiri ndi zowawa zaubwana komanso zomwe tikukumana nazo paubwana wathu. Palibe chomwe chingasinthidwe? Zikuoneka kuti chirichonse chiri bwino kwambiri.
Pali chilinganizo chokongola, chomwe mlembi wake sakudziwika: "Khalidwe ndilomwe linali paubwenzi." Chimodzi mwazinthu zomwe Sigmund Freud adapeza ndikuti zowawa zoyambilira zimabweretsa zovuta m'miyoyo yathu, zomwe pambuyo pake zimatanthauzira malo amoyo wozindikira.
Izi zikutanthauza kuti tikakula timadzipeza tikugwiritsa ntchito njira yomwe sinakonzedwe ndi ife, koma ndi ena. Koma simungalembenso mbiri yanu, simungasankhe nokha maubwenzi ena.
Kodi izi zikutanthauza kuti zonse zimakonzedweratu ndipo tingapirire popanda kuyesa kukonza chilichonse? Freud mwiniyo adayankha funsoli poyambitsa lingaliro la kukakamiza kubwereza mu psychoanalysis.
Mwachidule, kufunikira kwake kuli motere: kumbali imodzi, khalidwe lathu lamakono nthawi zambiri limawoneka ngati kubwereza mayendedwe am'mbuyomu (uku ndikulongosola kwa neurosis). Kumbali ina, kubwerezabwerezaku kumangochitika kuti tithe kukonza chinachake pakalipano: ndiko kuti, njira yosinthira imapangidwira mu dongosolo lomwe la neurosis. Tonse timadalira zam'mbuyo ndipo tili ndi zinthu zomwe tingathe kuzikonza.
Timakonda kulowa m'mikhalidwe yobwerezabwereza, kuyerekezera maubwenzi omwe sanathe m'mbuyomo.
Mutu wobwerezabwereza umawonekera m'nkhani zamakasitomala: nthawi zina monga kukhumudwa komanso kufooka, nthawi zina ngati cholinga chodzichotsera udindo pa moyo wake. Koma nthawi zambiri, kuyesa kumvetsetsa ngati n'kotheka kuchotsa zolemetsa zakale kumabweretsa funso la zomwe kasitomala amachita kuti akokere mtolowu mopitirira, nthawi zina ngakhale kuonjezera kuuma kwake.
Mtsikana wina wazaka 29, dzina lake Larisa, ananena kuti: “Ndimadziwana mosavuta, ndine munthu womasuka. Koma maubwenzi amphamvu sagwira ntchito: amuna posachedwapa amatha popanda kufotokoza.
Chikuchitikandi chiyani? Timapeza kuti Larisa sadziwa zosiyana za khalidwe lake - pamene mnzanu akuyankha kumasuka kwake, amagonjetsedwa ndi nkhawa, zikuwoneka kuti ali pachiopsezo. Kenako amayamba kuchita mwaukali, kudziteteza ku ngozi yongoganiza, ndipo potero amathamangitsa mnzanga watsopano. Sakudziwa kuti akuukira chinthu chamtengo wapatali kwa iye.
Kusatetezeka kwanu kumakupatsani mwayi wozindikira kusatetezeka kwa wina, zomwe zikutanthauza kuti mutha kupita patsogolo pang'ono moyandikira.
Timakonda kulowa m'mikhalidwe yobwerezabwereza, kuyerekezera maubwenzi omwe sanathe m'mbuyomo. Kumbuyo kwa khalidwe la Larisa ndi kupwetekedwa mtima kwaubwana: kufunikira kotetezedwa ndi kulephera kuchipeza. Kodi zimenezi zingatheke bwanji panopa?
M'kati mwa ntchito yathu, Larissa akuyamba kumvetsa kuti chochitika chomwecho akhoza zinachitikira ndi maganizo osiyana. M'mbuyomu, zinkawoneka kwa iye kuti kuyandikira wina kumatanthauza kukhala pachiwopsezo, koma tsopano amapeza mwayi wokhala ndi ufulu wochulukirapo pazochita ndi zomverera.
Kusatetezeka kwanu kumakupatsani mwayi wopeza chiwopsezo cha wina, ndipo kudalirana uku kumakupatsani mwayi wopitilira muubwenzi - abwenzi, monga manja omwe ali muzolemba zodziwika bwino za Escher, jambulani wina ndi mnzake mosamala komanso mothokoza chifukwa cha njirayi. Zomwe zinamuchitikira zimakhala zosiyana, sizikubwerezanso zakale.
Kuti tichotse zolemetsa zakale, ndikofunikira kuti tiyambirenso ndikuwona kuti tanthauzo la zomwe zikuchitika siziri muzinthu ndi zochitika zomwe zimatizungulira - zili mwa ife tokha. Psychotherapy sisintha kalendala yakale, koma imalola kuti ilembedwenso pamlingo wa matanthauzo.