M'mabanja omwe ali ndi maubwenzi osavuta, kukwapula kuntchito kumawoneka ngati kwachilendo ndipo sikutsutsana ndi mfundo yakuti ana amakonda ndi kulemekeza abambo. Nthawi zambiri zimakhala zowopsa osati zenizeni.
tsitsani kanema
Kukwapula ndi chinthu chankhanza kwambiri. Ichi ndi chilango chakuthupi cha mwana, kaŵirikaŵiri ndi lamba m’matako, ndi ntchito yopweteka kwambiri ndi kuvulaza mwanayo kaŵirikaŵiri, kotero kuti asachitenso zimene akukwapulidwa. Kupereka lamba si kukwapula, ndi kupereka lamba wopweteka kamodzi kapena kawiri. M'nthawi yathu ino, kukwapula ndi lamba monga njira zamaphunziro sizimagwiritsidwa ntchito, ngakhale kuopseza kwa makolo (kawirikawiri kuchokera kwa abambo) kumamveka, kutha ndi kukwapula papa.
Komabe, zonse zimachitika m'moyo. Zitsanzo zenizeni za moyo:
Zomwe zimachitikira kukwapula zimadalira kwambiri malo a moyo wa mwanayo: ngati ubalewu ndi wosavuta, ngati mozungulira, m'mabanja ena, ana onse amakwapulidwa, choncho, komanso panthawi yake, kukwapula kumawonedwa ngati chilango wamba. Ngati palibe amene amalangidwa mwakuthupi, koma ndinalangidwa, ndipo ngakhale - choipitsitsa - anzanga adadziwa za izo ndipo akhoza kuziseka, mwanayo akhoza kuziwona kwambiri, monga kupwetekedwa mtima.
M'mabanja omwe ali ndi ubale wosavuta, kuopsezedwa kwa kukwapulidwa kumawonedwa ngati kwachilendo monga m'banja lopita patsogolo, kuopsezedwa kwa kukhala opanda TV.
Onerani kanema wa "Adoption" kuchokera ku filimuyo "Liquidation", komwe, panthawi yomwe analeredwa, mwana amabera bambo ake omwe adangopezeka kumene - wotchi ...
kugwira ntchito bwino
Mphamvu yakukwapula ndiyokayikitsa. Zikuwoneka kuti pakukwapula, ana amawopa kwambiri osati ululu womwewo, koma kumverera kwakusowa thandizo ndi kunyozeka. Nthawi zambiri amanyadira kuti amatha kupirira kukwapulidwa (“Sindikunyadira chilichonse!”). Ngati maunansi m’banja ali ovuta, makolo alibe ulamuliro, ndiye kuti kukwapula sikumawonjezera kalikonse ku maunansi oterowo: Kuopa ululu kwa mwanayo sikudzalowa m’malo mwa kupanda ulamuliro kwa makolo. Kupambana kwakukulu komwe kungapezeke nthawi zina ndiko kulepheretsa ana kusagwirizana ndi anthu.
Sindimaopa amayi anga - ndipita kukaba kwa amayi anga. Ndimachita mantha ndi bambo anga - sindizaba.
Zikuwoneka kuti muyenera kusiyanitsa: kukwapula nthawi zonse ndikupatsidwa lamba. Kukwapulidwa kosalekeza kumakhala ndi vuto la kusowa thandizo kwa makolo, kapena malingaliro ankhanza a makolo. Nthaŵi zina kupereka lamba pamene mwana amayesa mphamvu za makolo ake, samvera mawu ndikuchita zonse mwachipongwe - makamaka m'mabanja osavuta kungakhale kofunikira ndipo amamvetsetsa bwino anawo: "Thamangani. pamwamba? -ndipo».
M’mabanja amene ana ali abwinobwino, chifukwa chakuti makolowo iwo eniwo ndi anthu anzeru ndi akhalidwe labwino, kukwapula ndi lamba sikuli kofunikira mwanjira iriyonse, iwo amaperekedwa mosavuta ndipo amawonedwa m’malo mwa nkhanza.
Zimakhala zovuta kuyankha makolo omwe anyalanyaza kale ana awo, kumene ana ndi ovuta, ndipo makolowo sasiyana chikhalidwe: "Ndiye bwanji m'malo mwa kukwapula?" - Yankho: kukhala makolo abwinobwino.
Kafukufuku akuwonetsa:
Amayi ndi abambo ambiri omwe amagwiritsira ntchito chilango choopsa chakuthupi anali, kuwonjezera apo, ozizira ndi opanda chidwi ndi ana awo, nthawi zina ngakhale adani awo poyera, sanawamvere, ndipo nthawi zambiri amasonyeza kusagwirizana kapena kugwirizana m'maphunziro a ana awo. M’kafukufuku wakale wa R. Sears, E. Maccoby, ndi G. Levin, zinasonyezedwa kuti makolo amene amagwiritsira ntchito gu.ee chilango chakuthupi samangomenya ana awo kaŵirikaŵiri, koma analinso osagwirizana ndipo nthaŵi zina amalola ngakhale kumvana mopambanitsa ( . Sears, Maccoby ndi Levin, 1957). Mu kafukufuku wa asayansi a Oregon, adapezanso kuti chilango cha makolo chimasakanikirana ndi makhalidwe ena. Monga momwe Patterson anagogomezera mobwerezabwereza, amayi ndi abambo a ana avuto amene iye ndi antchito ake anawapenda sanali chabe olanga mopambanitsa, koma analinso ogwira mtima kukhomereza chilango mwa ana awo. Sanali osankha mokwanira komanso osasinthasintha posankha zochita kuti apereke mphotho kapena kulanga, ndipo nthawi zonse komanso mopanda tsankho, ankawazunza, kuwatemberera, ndikuwopseza ana awo (Patterson, 1986a, 1986b; Patterson, Dishion and Bank, 1984; Patterson, DeBaryshe ndi Ramsey, 1989). Onani →
Mwinamwake ndi zambiri mu izi, osati mu kukwapula komweko?
Nkhani zovuta sizitha msanga. Makolo amafunika kuleza mtima, ndipo ana amafunikira malo abwino. Ngati simungathe kupirira nokha ndi mwanayo - ganizirani za yemwe angakuthandizeni pa izi. Ngati achikulirewo amakhala ngati anthu, ngati mwana wazunguliridwa ndi chikondi komanso kuuma koyenera, ngakhale ana ovuta amakhala bwino m'zaka zingapo. Onani, mwachitsanzo, zomwe zinachitikira anthu amtundu wa Kitezh.