Kuyankhulana ndi Gabrielle Rubin pa zoletsa pakukula kwa ana
makolo : Malinga ndi inu, kuletsa kumamanga lingaliro ndikulola mwana kulenga. Kodi choletsa ndi chiyani?
Gabrielle Rubin : Zonsezi ndi zoletsedwa. Omwe amalamulidwa ndi anthu komanso onse otchuka "Musamachite izi", "Musamaponye phala lanu pansi", "Ndimakuletsani kumenyana kusukulu". Ndi zophweka: pamene inu kuletsa munthu kuchita chinachake, makamaka mwana, iwo amangofuna chinthu chimodzi ... ndipo ndi kupeza njira kupita ndi kuona zimene zikuchitika kuseri kwake. Uwu ndiye mutu wankhani ya Bluebeard, yemwe mkazi wake amakankhira chitseko cha nyumbayo kuti asatsegule!
P.: Pamene tiika zoletsa, kodi sitikhala pachiwopsezo chotsekereza chidwi chathu chofuna kuphunzira?
GR : M'malo mwake. Tsopano timauza ana zonse, ngakhale ana ang'onoang'ono. Kuphatikizapo zokhudzana ndi kugonana. Koma chinsinsicho chimakulitsanso luntha. Tengerani chitsanzo cha mwana wamng’ono amene adziŵa kuti posachedwapa adzakhala ndi mchimwene wake. Adzifunsa mafunso okhudza "timapanga bwanji makanda". Ngati, m'malo monena zonse, timayankha kuti kufotokozera sikuli kwa tsopano, kuti ali wamng'ono kwambiri, amafunafuna ndikupanga malingaliro, nthawi zambiri zabodza komanso ngakhale osadziwika. Koma, pang’ono ndi pang’ono, m’kupita kwa nthaŵi, zimachitika zokha ku chinachake chimene chimawoneka ngati chenicheni. Izi zimatchedwa "mayesero ndi zolakwika" njira, yomwe ili maziko a sayansi yonse, yazinthu zonse za sayansi. Ndipo ndi zomwe mwanayo amachita: amayesa, akuwona kuti sizikuyenda bwino, amayesa njira ina.
P.: Kodi pali zoletsa zina zomwe zili "zanzeru" kuposa zina?
GR : Ndikofunika kuika m’maganizo mwa ana ndi makolo kuti zoletsa n’zofunika kwambiri poika malire. Ngakhale zomwe zikuchitika pano ndizovuta kuzichotsa. Koma ndithudi, ngati kuletsa kuli kosayenera kapena kosamveka, kungakhale ndi zotsatira zovulaza. Pali zoletsa zoyipa, ndipo psychoanalysis imathandizira kuletsa zotsatira zake! Chotero, kuuza mwana kuti sadzakhala ndi ufulu wochita zimenezo kapena ntchito yoteroyo kapena kuti iye ndi wopusa kwambiri kuti asapite kusukulu, kungachedwetse kukula kwake kwabwino. Ndipo pamene, monga munthu wamkulu, timachita psychoanalysis, timayamba kudzifunsa chifukwa chake ndili choncho, chifukwa chiyani, mwachitsanzo, ndimamera pansi pazomwe ndingathe, chifukwa chiyani sindinapeze mwamuna kapena mkazi yemwe amagwirizana ndi ine. Timadzifunsa mafunso amene amatibweza ku zoletsedwa zovulaza zimenezi.
P.: Anthu amasiku ano akuwoneka kuti akupita ku kukana zoletsa maphunziro. Chifukwa chiyani?
GR : Kukanidwa kwa zoletsedwa kumapeza chimodzi mwazinthu zake pakukana kwatsopano kwa ulamuliro wa abambo. Izi sizodziwika bwino komanso sizilandiridwa bwino ndi anthu. Makolo amadzimva kukhala olakwa akagwiritsa ntchito mwamphamvu pang’ono. Tiyeni timveke momveka bwino: mwaulamuliro, si nkhani yozunza mwanayo. Koma kuika malire omveka bwino pakati pa zomwe zili zololedwa ndi zosaloledwa. Makolo sayerekezanso. Chizoloŵezi chake ndi "Wokondedwa wosauka, timamukhumudwitsa." " M'malo mwake ! Timamupanga iye wanzeru. Ndipo kuwonjezera apo, timamutsimikizira. Pamene sitidziwa njira yoti titsatire, timafunika munthu wamkulu kuti atitsogolere. Zokulirapo, titha kuzisintha ngati tikufuna!
* Wolemba wa "Chifukwa chiyani kuletsa kumapangitsa ana athu kukhala anzeru", ed. Eyrolles.