Ndikosavuta kuwononga mawonekedwe oyamba mukakumana. Makamaka ngati ndinu introvert ndipo interlocutor wanu ndi extrovert. Kodi tingabwezere bwanji wina ndi mnzake ndipo pambuyo pake tingasinthe malingaliro athu pankhani yodziwana chatsopano?
Mumabwera kudzacheza ndikuwona anthu ambiri atsopano omwe simunakumane nawo. Mukawayang'ana - ndipo kuyang'ana kwanu nthawi yomweyo kumagwira munthu yemwe simulankhulana naye lero! Kodi munazindikira bwanji izi ndipo nchifukwa ninji, popanda ngakhale kulankhula ndi mnzako watsopano, mumakana nthawi yomweyo kulankhulana?
Yankho lingakhale pamwamba ngati ndinu munthu wongolankhula, ndipo amene mwamsanga munam’dziŵikitsa monga munthu wosayenerera kulankhulana ali wonyada, akutero wopenda makhalidwe Jack Schafer.
"Otsatsa amawoneka odzidalira, opusa, odzikweza komanso onyada kwa omwe amangolankhula. Ma introverts, kuchokera kumalingaliro a owonetsa, ndi otopetsa komanso odekha, osagwirizana ndi anthu, "akutero Schafer. Ndipo ziribe kanthu zomwe munganene, ziribe kanthu momwe mungakhalire m'tsogolomu, zochita zanu zonse zidzaganiziridwa kupyolera mu prism ya lingaliro loyamba.
Timasangalala anthu akatizungulira akamafotokoza mmene timaonera moyo. Chifukwa chake zimakhala kuti ma extroverts ndi ma introverts nthawi zambiri amakhala opanda chikondi kwa wina ndi mnzake. Chisamaliro cha akale chimakopeka ndi dziko lakunja, otsirizawa amasunga zochitika zawo zamkati. Kuonjezera apo, gwero lalikulu la mphamvu kwa extrovert ndi kulankhulana ndi ena, pamene introvert, kudzuka m'mawa ndi "batire yodzaza mokwanira", imathetsedwa ndi madzulo chifukwa chokumana ndi ena. Ndipo kuti apeze mphamvu, amafunikira kukhala chete - ndipo makamaka kusungulumwa pang'ono.
ganiza, kumva, kulankhula
Ndi kusiyana kwa moyo ndi maonekedwe a dziko zomwe zingayambitse kusamvana pakati pa anthu awiri omwe ali pa "mitengo" yosiyana, akutero Jack Schafer.
Mosiyana ndi anthu ongolankhula, amene modekha ndiponso nthaŵi zina amauza ena zimene akumana nazo mosangalala, nthaŵi zambiri anthu ongoyamba kumene kulankhula sakhala okonzeka kufotokoza zakukhosi kwawo. Ndipo kukwiyitsidwa komwe kumachitika ndi anzawo ocheza nawo kumatha kudziunjikira mkati mwawo kwa nthawi yayitali kwambiri. Ndipo pokhapokha ngati woyambitsayo sangathe kudziletsa, amapereka mndandanda wa "machimo" ake. Ndipo ingakhale yaikulu kwambiri!
Otulutsa ambiri amakonda kutsiriza mawu omwe wolankhulayo akunena.
Kodi extroverts amakwiyitsa bwanji oyambitsa akafika pamsonkhano woyamba?
Amakonda kunena zimene amaganiza popanda kuganizira kwambiri mmene ena akumvera. Komano, ma introverts, nthawi zambiri amayamba kuganiza zonena za malingaliro awo, ndipo samamvetsetsa momwe munganyalanyaze zomwe ena akumana nazo.
Kuphatikiza apo, ambiri amangokonda kutsiriza mawu omwe interlocutor akunena. Komano, anthu ongoyamba kumene, amakonda kuloŵetsamo mawu awo ndi kupuma kuti awongolere maganizo awo, kuwafikitsa ku ungwiro. Ndipo ndithudi sadzilola kuganiza za ena. Pamene extrovert mwadzidzidzi amasokoneza interlocutor ndi kumaliza mawu ake, introvert amakhumudwa.
Perekani mwayi winanso
Tsoka ilo, kuwonekera koyambako kumakhala kovuta kwambiri kusintha, katswiriyo akugogomezera. Ndipo ngati kumayambiriro kwa kulankhulana tili ndi maganizo oipa a winayo, sitingathe kupitiriza kukambirana kapena kukumana naye kachiwiri. Ndipo popanda msonkhano wobwerezabwereza, wobala zipatso ndi wosangalatsa, sipangakhale nkhani ya kusintha kulikonse.
Palinso vuto lina lofunika. Tikakhala ndi chithunzi choyamba cha munthu, zimakhala zovuta kuti tisinthe malingaliro athu. Pambuyo pake, kuvomereza kuti wotsutsana naye sangakhale woipa kwambiri ndiko kuvomereza kuti tinalakwitsa pa zigamulo zathu. Ndipo, kukhala owona ku lingaliro loyamba, timakhala ndi nkhawa zochepa kuposa ngati taganiza zovomereza kuti tinali olakwa, katswiriyo akutsimikiza.
Kumvetsa mmene anthu osiyanasiyana amalankhulirana kungatithandize kuti tizigwirizana ndi ena.
Kodi mfundo zimenezi tingazigwiritse ntchito bwanji pa moyo wathu? Choyamba, ngati tikumbukira kusiyana kwa khalidwe pakati pa anthu ongolankhula ndi introverts, sitidzada nkhawa kwambiri ndi zifukwa zomwe sitikonda munthu. Mwina angochokera “ku sandbox yosiyana”.
Chachiwiri, kumvetsa mmene anthu osiyanasiyana amalankhulirana kungatithandize kuti tizigwirizana. Mwina tidzakhala osamala kwambiri ndi ena kapena tidzatha kuvomereza zodziwika bwino za kulumikizana kwawo.
Za Wolemba: Jack Schafer ndi katswiri wamakhalidwe.